Living For Myself (Sequel)

Disaster

It was time. The day that Winter and I would have to go have dinner with my mom and father. I already could tell that this entire monstrosity of an Indra would end badly, however it was too late to come up with something to get out of it. Winter was excited honestly, but the thought of things ending poorly kept coming to mind. I wasn't scared of Winter's reaction of them, I was worried about... my father blowing up at me. I already know his views on this sort of stuff and he's completely against it. Like... "the gays will all go to hell" against it. He's your stereotypical homophobic piece of shit who forces his own opinion on people, but then there's me who is his raging lesbian daughter. Yep, disaster.

My mom kept sending texts throughout the last hour of getting ready to go such as asking if we're on our way yet, what we want to eat, and other minuscule things. I love my mom, but I think she's going overboard. I know it's just because of what had happened with Nora, but the fact still stands that there will always be that thought in the back of my mind that things won't ever go my way or at least decently good. I'm scared I'm reality that I'll be left all alone again and my heart can't take even the thought of that let alone if it were to actually happen.

Is it too much to ask for a happy ending? It doesn't even have to be one of those unbelievable fairly tale ones, I just want to live my life normally with the one I love. It's hard enough to struggle alone with my mental issues, but tragedies, obviously, make those issues more prominent. I don't want to cry anymore, be alone, feel as if I was the one at fault, or be blamed for anything else. I just want to live my life now as it is with Winter and that's that.

Is that really too much to ask for?

That said... maybe it is.

Maybe it is my fault for having such normalized expectations compared to the reality that is my own life. Maybe it is my fault for wanting to be happy. Maybe it is my fault that Nora died in the first place. Maybe, but not confirmed. I know it's not me, I know that, but my mind won't let me believe it any other way. It is and always will be my fault that bad things happened to the ones I love.

I'm sorry.

Winter just finished getting dresses and ready when I finally snapped out of my own trance. In a cheery voice, she asked if I was ready to go and twirled around in her short black dress while popping her feet out to reveal she was wearing sneakers. I giggled at that, but nodded and grabbed her hand to leave. The drive was weirdly quiet, but it more or less probably had to do with the fact that we were both scared what was going to happen. My mom, from what I've told her, loves Winter. My father in the other hand... only knew how to communicate in slurs when my mom told him about Winter.

It's reaching the point that if he were to say anything to Winter in a defiling tone, I would immediately beat the shut out of him. I don't have any other ways to respond when it comes to him because, for one, I hate him, but, also, I love Winter and I won't let anyone speak to her that way. Send me to jail, I don't care, I'm going to stand up for her and beat the crap out of someone if I have to.

We pulled into the driveway with slow stop as neither of us wanted to exit the car. I looked at Winter as she did the same to me with a concerned gaze. She was scared. I couldn't blame her either, because I was scared as well. There wasn't anything to do to comfort her besides taking her hand and looking her in the eye.

"Listen, I don't care what my father is going to say to me about this. I love you, don't doubt that, so I'm going to protect you no matter what, ok?" I asked her, rubbing my thumb over her knuckles. Winter nodded and smiled shyly.

Finally, we stepped out of the car as my mom was outside on the porch smiling widely. As we approached her, she pulled Winter into a tight hug with a bright smile as she gave me a quick hug as if it was an afterthought.

"My, you're just as pretty as Adelle told me you were! Let's go on in, I took out some chicken to cook. I figured we could stuff it and have some veggies on the side." We both nodded and followed her inside. The house looked the same as it did the last time it was here, but there were more photos of my mom and father together hanging up all over the place. Where one's of me had been were now replaced by despicable photos of my father. I could tell her either took them down himself or forced my mom to do it because I know she would never do that herself.

The closer we got to the kitchen, the more my heart pounded in dread. When we entered, my father turned to me and Winter with a disgusted scowl. He made no comment though, but instead stood up and walked over to Winter.

"Ah, you must be Winter! I'm Adelle's dad." He said, holding out his hand. I was worried about what he was doing, but stood back right behind Winter to watch him. Winter took his hand and shook it with a fake smile and proceeded to try to sit down. As soon as she tried to though, he reached his hand around and dragged his fingertips from the top of her back all the way down to her thighs as he made a disgusting sound in approval to it.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing!" I screamed at him, pulling his hand off of her and twisting it hard to make him cry out. It didn't stop there, for that was enough to piss me off, so I even went in the kick him as hard as I could in the crotch. "I'm over this, I'm calling the cops for sexual harassment. Have fun going back to jail!" I screamed at him.

"You bitch! I'm going to kill you!" He yelled, lunging towards me as I tried to get my phone out to call the police...