The Heart

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Freshman year. They had just moved to Forks, I'd been living here all my life. My older brother, however, was long gone, in college somewhere in New York. So it's just my mom and me.

I remember the day they first got here, I don't think I could forget if my life depended on it. No one would shut up about them and some people acted as if they were celebrities, and four years later, they're still the talk of the town. Somewhere along the line, I was sucked into the gossip as well. All thanks to Jasper.

For a year, I never had any contact with any of them. My freshman year was normal; peaceful and full of nonsense drama. I even had a boyfriend, my first love. He was a senior but we were each other's firsts. The love I had for him, it was heartbreaking and irrational and looking back at it now, embarrassing. Through all of it though, I still can't say I regret it.

Then came sophomore year. I had broken up with him over the summer because I couldn't stand the thought of holding him back. He had never done anything before and I remember my brother telling me his wild tales of college. I wanted him to go out and get drunk, meet girls that he'll never talk to again after they hook up. He needed to live and grow into the person he needed to be, so I let him go. I remember crying so much my chest hurt, my vision went black around the edges because I couldn't breathe. It hurt so much not to have him or talk to him.

Then along came the Cullen's. More specifically, Jasper. It was second period, we had gym together and were paired up for stretches. I remember the goose bumps on my skin from how cold his hands were and how ridged he was.

Then, he took one breath in and his eyes never left me.

Over the next couple weeks, he eased into talking to me and I could feel the attraction I had for him, but I refused to give in to it. I felt that if I admitted that I liked him, it'd be betraying my first love.

Jasper, however, wasn't having any of that. He never gave up and never once made me feel like I was rushed. I didn't convince myself to love him, I never even had a thought in my mind to even start. It was sudden. One day I saw him in the hallway on my way home and that was it. I lost my breath and my knees grew weak. I remember how he ran up to me and grabbed my shoulders asking if I were okay, but I just blurted out that I loved him. That was also the day he told me what he is.

He never once apologized for keeping it from me, nor did he apologize for who he is. He did tell me though, that it was completely my choice. I could walk out of the house and take his car and leave, even if I didn't know how to drive. I could never speak to him again or I could take as much time as I needed to collect myself. He also told me that if I stayed, he'd never let me go. He'd love me until the end of his existence.

I stayed. I remember touching his face, his tense jaw, and running my thumb over his lips. I remember feeling terrified of doing it, scared of the power he had over me. Even then, I couldn't bring myself to run away. I remember hugging him as tightly as my body would allow. "Why are you doing this to yourself, you're scared." Those were the words he spoke instead of hugging me back. I remember nodding and balling my hands into fists so they wouldn't shake. "I'm terrified." I whispered.

"But I can't let you go." Only then did he hug me back.

Jasper Whitlock who had to have his name changed to keep his true identity a secret. Frozen at nineteen but well passed that age. And myself, a human girl of fifteen, almost sixteen. And somehow, it worked.

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