Owned (Minsung fanfic/smut)

Chapter 88

jisung spent the next day of practice in chan's box, he didn't want to talk to anyone. he felt awful.

he had hoped that sleeping with chan would help but now he just felt unbearably guilty. hyeon hadn't talked to him and looked so sad. jeongin was still ignoring him which meant he didn't really talk to seungmin or hyunjin either, he couldn't stop thinking about minho. just the idea of being in his arms made his heart hurt.

he regretted everything but he was so confused, he really thought that minho did love him too, he felt stupid for believeing that now.

he looked over the edge of chan's box as felix called him down. he stood up and ran his hand through his hair, making his way down to the club floor. chan was already down there, he went to stand with felix.

he sighed as felix put his arm around jisung's shoulders.

"are you upset about minho?"

"no. i hate him."

it was a lie of course. he was angry at minho, but he couldn't hate him.

he stayed by felix's side as he watched his old best friends laugh and joke together until there was the sound of the bell ringing at the door.

everyone looked up as two members of security went to open them. there were voices until jisung's heart dropped.

minho appeared at the door, coming in, looking at jisung.

he was stopped by security as chan got up from his seat. jisung felt hurt and confused, but mainly angry. he shouldn't be sad over minho, he should be mad at him.

"why're you here?" jisung asked quickly.

"i need to talk to you jisung."

"no. i don't want to talk to you."

minho went to speak before his eyes moved down, looking at the marks on jisung's neck, he stopped before he looked at chan's neck, then back at jisung.

"d-did you...."

jisung glared at him.

"yes. i don't need or want you, i'm hooking up with chan and he fucks me better than you ever did."

he was expecting minho to retaliate and get mad, that's what he wanted, for minho to feel the way he was feeling, angry and frustrated.

what he wasn't expecting was for minho's eyes to fill up with tears.

he pressed his lips together, trying to hold his tears back as the room went silent. that stung like being stabbed in the chest. he lowered his head a little. minho rarely cried, let alone in front of everyone.

jisung realized what he did when the tears fell down minho's face, landing on the floor. he felt instant regret and guilt worse than before as minho started to break down into cries.

he watched as minho reached into his bag, taking out jisung's stuffed bear.

"m-minho i-"

"don't even fucking try jisung," riku cut him off, taking everyone by surprise "i want nothing to do with either of you but that was below the belt. in front of everyone too? how could you do that to him, you're pathetic."

jisung flinched, looking at his friends, they said nothing and kept their eyes down, even felix.

he didn't know what to say or how to respond.

minho felt humiliated, he tried to change for jisung, he tried to give him what he needed and he had worked so hard to let himself trust jisung, but hearing jisung say that in front of a room full of people was so deeply embarrassing, he wanted the ground to open and swallow him so je didn't have to stand in front of everyone. he had spent the last two nights in jisung's room, hating himself for how he handled the situation, he had cried more in the past few nights than he ever had.

his guard came crashing down and his vulnerability showed itself to everyone. he wasn't strong and cold and mean, he was broken and fragile. he looked down at the bear in his hands, the bear he had been clinging to for days, beating himself up over what he had said. he knew he handled it wrong but he never expected for jisung to respond like this.

he couldn't move, he felt frozen to the spot. he felt small and pathetic in front of everyone and he didn't know what to do.

jisung didn't know what to do either, he wished he could take back everything he said, especially what he just said to minho. riku was right, he was pathetic.

he felt his eyes fill up with tears.

"oh you're crying? what right do you have to be upset?!" riku yelled at jisung.

"riku enough." chan mumbled.

"no, he thinks he can turn up here and brush his problems onto everyone else, he thinks he can come in here and seduce the boss and we'd all be fine with it?!"

jisung looked up towards riku, feeling a sudden serge of anger.

"stop it." jisung mumbled through gritted teeth.

"i'm not going to stop jisung, you're a fucking slut. minho deserves better."

jisung lost it and lunged at riku, taking him to the floor and punching him hard in the face. he didn't know what was controlling his body but he felt the need to take everything out on riku.

felix pulled him off riku almost immediately, looking at him as he started bleeding, he then realized what he had done.

"jisung!"

felix kept hold of jisung's arm as everyone including chan went to riku's side. as they did, minho turned to leave, keeping his head down.

"minho-" jisung said quickly.

minho ignored him and dropped his bear on the floor, leaving the club, he couldn't hold in his sobs.

"get your bear, i'll take you to my room, we seriously need to talk." felix mumbled, looking over at riku.

jisung picked his bear up from the floor, starting to cry as he hugged it, burying his face in it. felix took his arm and left the room, taking him up to his dorm.

he ran jisung's hand under the cold tap as his knuckles started to bruise.

"what the hell was that?"

"i don't know." jisung whispered, keeping his bear against his face.

"i thi-"

"i want minho."

he started to cry properly, pulling his hand away from the sink and hugging his bear, letting himself break down.

felix took jisung to his room, guiding him into bed as he got in too.

"why did you say that to minho? that was really harsh."

"i don't know, it was the meanest thing i could think of and i wanted minho to feel like i feel."

"but you know how much it hurts, why would you wish that on minho?"

"because he doesn't care when he hurts me."

"doesn't he? or does he just not show it?"

"what?"

"if he didn't care, he wouldn't have come back, he wouldn't have cried like that in front of everyone either, he wouldn't have tried to change for you if he didn't care."

jisung out his head down, crying harder. felix was right and he messed up really bad.

"i-i want minho." he cried, wishing he could go back in time and feel minho's arms around him.

felix put his arms around him and hugged him close.

"i love you jisung, but you really screwed up."

jisung could only cry into his bear, not knowing what to do. not knowing anything other than how much he needed minho.

=====