Owned (Minsung fanfic/smut)

Chapter 90

"jisung?"

jisung looked up as felix walked into the room.

"the boss wants to talk to you."

jisung had been avoiding chan since the situation with minho and riku, he stayed in felix's dorm most of the time.

he stood up, sighing as he walked towards the door. he felt so defeated, he messed everything up and he couldn't get the image of minho crying out of his head, but the more time he spent away from minho, the more he missed him.

he walked out into the club, past jeongin and seungmin, keeping his head down as he went to chan's office, knocking on the door. he opened it and went inside when chan replied.

jisung sat down on the chair in front of chan's desk, not looking at him.

"jisung."

"yes hyung?"

"look at me."

jisung sighed and lifted his eyes to meet chan's.

"any ideas what i'm going to say?"

jisung nodded slowly.

"there's a lot i think you're going to say, i'm so-"

"that won't cut it jisung."

"what?"

"you know i care about you, a lot, but you're not an employee, you're not my responsibility anymore, i can't let you get away with attacking riku. he shouldn't have gotten involved and what he said was wrong but you didn't have to hit him, let alone make him bleed. i need to prioritise the safety of the dancers that live and work here over your relationship problems."

jisung looked down, staying silent.

"i'm glad i can see how what you did though." he continued.

"what do you mean?"

"i'm talking about how you used me."

"what?"

"you don't feel anything for me at all do you?"

"i-"

"i feel so stupid, when you wanted me i thought it was because you were finally seeing that i care about you so deeply, that i treat you better than minho, but that was my mistake. it actually meant a lot to me jisung, i've wanted you for a long time, but you wanted me so you could make yourself feel better. then taking the experience that meant a lot to me and rubbing it in minho's face in front of everyone like i'm nothing but some sort of flex really showed me that you did it to get back at minho and not because you wanted intimacy with me."

jisung kept his mouth shut, it hurt to hear but it was all true.

"did you think about minho while having sex with me?"

he felt guilty again, keeping his eyes down and refusing to look chan in the eyes.

"how could i be so stupid? i didn't see what you were really doing because what we did was meaningful to me. you really can't stay here jisung, if i didn't care about you so much i'd kick you out right now, but where would you go? you took advantage of both of the people that took care of you and offered you so much, i know minho messed up but what you said to him took everything too far."

jisung felt tears in his eyes but he swallowed them down. the guilt was getting too much.

"i-i'm so sorry hyung."

"are you?"

"yes! i am, i regret everything. i'm sorry i used you, i'm sorry i hit riku, i wish i could take it back i just don't know how to fix it, i didn't mean to use you hyung i wasn't thinking, i just wanted to feel cared for, not just for the pleasure but how it felt to be in someone's arms, to have someone want you to feel good is the best experience and it was comforting to me, to be praised and petted made me feel so special and important, the gentle touches and the pet names and the kisses mean so much to me. i was doing it because it made me feel so safe and wanted, i know now that it was so wrong of me and i'm so sorry, you've always been there for me and it means the world to me i swear i appreciate you so much. i'm so deeply sorry hyung, i know why you're angry with me and i don't blame you for hating me but i swear i will never ever do anything like this again, i need you and my friends, i took advantage of all of you and i'm sorry."

chan sighed and rubbed his forehead, leaning against the table.

"i don't want to kick you out because i know you have nowhere else to go, but you can't stay here if you're going to lash out at my dancers."

"i intend to apologise to riku, i talked to hyeon about it. i'll say sorry to him, i'll befriend him, i won't ever do anything like that again."

"apologize to riku, then we need to figure out where you're going to go, here isn't an option."

jisung nodded as he looked down at his hands, he didn't know where he would go, he felt so helpless. he stood up and thanked chan before leaving his office.

he struggled to hold back his tears as he walked back through the club, not acknowledging seungmin or jeongin as he went to the elevator, going up to felix's dorm.

he went to his phone, opening it and finding minjoon's contact. he held it to his ear, biting at his lip.

"jisung?"

"hyung, i need you."

"i don't have anything to say to you right now."

jisung bit at his lip, minjoon was scary when he was mad, he wasn't yelling but there was an edge to his voice that felt unsettling.

"please hyung, i'm sorry, i'm so sorry, i need help."

"with what?"

"chan is kicking me out, he doesn't want me here i have nowhere else to go."

"you think minho would want you in here after what you said?"

"he hates me i know-"

"the opposite jisung, he misses you, so much."

"h-he does?"

"he's giving himself such a hard time over what happened, he's hurt, really hurt. being told you don't want or need him anymore because chan is better hit him like a bus."

"i miss him."

"don't you have the boss now?"

"no! i don't want chan, not really. he's not better than minho, minho makes me feel things that chan never could, i-i love him."

"it's a bit late for that, i don't think you should come back here."

"i don't have anywhere to go, i'll be homeless."

"where's hyeon?"

jisung bit at his lip, the way minjoon chaged the topic to hyeon, that stung. but he knew he deserved it.

"in his room."

"is he okay?"

"not really, he misses you a lot."

"i miss him so much, i feel awful, minho told me to take him back to the club but i didn't want to, i don't want him there, he's so scared of the men at the club, tell him i'm so sorry, i wish i could come and get him and take care of him, i'm trying to figure out a way but there's no way for me to be with him without chan finding out, and he'd be in so much trouble."

"i'll him hyung, i'll tell him you're sorry. where's taeya?"

"in her room, she's angry too."

"tell her i'm sorry, i didn't mean what i said, i miss her so much, i have the t-shirt we got together, i'm wearing it right now."

"i'll tell her."

"goodbye hyung."

"goodbye jisung."

jisung sat down on the bed and out his face in his hands, how did everything get so messed up?

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