Giving up on you

Giving up

"We have been friends since diapers, Shawn. We were inseparable, our mothers could hardly keep us apart and it didn't help that we lived right next door to each other." He continued to stare blankly at me.

"We would always have these sleepovers, you were interested in guitar and we would just sit in the park, you strumming away on your guitar while I read books."

"We would stay up all night in middle school and just talk for hours sometimes we would go out in my backyard and lie on the grass and we would look up into the sky together and admire the beauty of the stars."

"You started to write songs and I read more. You sang at the small café a few blocks from our houses, I was always there to support you, since you became nervous everytime you would sing."

"Girls started to notice you, we drifted apart, we weren't as close as we used to be, but we were still best friends but not so inseparable."

"There were days where I felt like absolute shit, and all I wanted to do was crawl up into a ball and cry. When I looked in the mirror and I was ashamed of what I saw. You made me feel beautiful, you made me smile those days, you made me feel okay."

"But then I started catching feelings you know, I would look at you and I wouldn't only see my best friend, I would see someone I wanted to be with."

"Shawn for one last time please do you remember me?" I asked my voice breaking.

"As my answer has always been. No. Can you please just stop, stop begging, stop forcing me. It's frustrating." He said.

"Sometimes I wish I had just died, the momentary pain would be far better than this. I wouldn't have to sit here constantly being forced to remember a past I was not a part of." He muttered.

I looked at him through my lashes and took a deep breath as I felt my heart beating to an irregular beat, "I'm done, I am, I am done trying to get you to remember. I am done trying to revive where we left off. I'm sorry that I made you feel angry. I am done waiting for you, I will not spend my whole life trying to pick up scraps of my life before the accident."

"I just-." I felt a tear slide down my cheek. "I just wish that you would remember any memory you had with me, I just wish it was all different, I am doing it, I'm giving up on you."

"I don't want to, I really don't want to, I wish I could wake up and all of this was just some twisted dream. I wish I really really wish, that everything was okay."

"I don't want to, I can't imagine my life without you, like completely without you within the flesh. I don't want a world without you, wether you remember me or not. I am selfish. I keep telling myself I'm not giving up on you, I am just giving you what you need but who am I kidding?"

"It's hard for me, how can I move on, how can I act like everything is okay... like everything is fine, how can I give up on you... when I'm still inlove with you?"

He looked up at me with blank eyes and a forced smile. I nodded as I stood up, I got it now. He didn't remember me and he was never going to.

"I think it's time I let you go. And that's so hard to do because some part of me will always be in love with you for the rest of my life. But the daydreaming, the running in place, it's not healthy. So I'm doing what I should have done months ago... I'm cutting the cord, I'm finally saying goodbye." I sighed in defeat.

"Goodbye Shawn." I said quietly as I gripped the door handle. He responded so quietly I bearly managed to hear what he said, "Kiki."

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AN: OMG I know and don't hate me but I think that is how I want to end the story?¿ Comment what you think...

Either comment sequel if you think I should do a sequel and a name for the sequel.

Or

Its all good for being okay with this ending

Also I just wanted to write a spin off of this book called Wanderlust, it's basically their road trip so it's like the accident never happened and they were able to go on the roadtrip what do you think? Please comment♡♥♡

It's been fun writing GUOY ♡¤☆