Our Secret • K.T Hawks

22

"I can't believe you got a vasectomy behind my back!" You sobbed, hand clenching around your phone. You had just come back from the couples class. The car ride back had been incredibly awkward and once it had stopped in front of the complex you were the first one out. Millions of thoughts were running around your mind, any person could see this from the different shifts your expression changed to between thoughts. "Three years I've been trying to get pregnant and you knew the entire time!"

Saburo had let himself in after a few minutes, his nonchalant face angered you when you turned from your seat on the sofa to see who had entered. A part of you had hoped it was Keigo. "Oh, come on, I did it a long time ago." He rolled his eyes.

"When?!" Your eyes widened at the once again new piece of information.

"I got it the week before our wedding."

"You did it before we got married?! You know how badly I wanted to be a mother!" You yelped in absolute shock, you couldn't believe him. The lump in your throat grew as you tried to hold back your tears. Sure you and Saburo haven't been getting along lately, your marriage seeming to completely deteriorate before your eyes. But, you had loved him once, years ago when you were younger. The thought of him making this decision without talking to you and disregarding your feelings about it hurt. A lot.

"That's exactly why I needed to make this choice without your input!"

"You could've told me, we could've talked about the possibility of adoption or the fact that you didn't want kids earlier," you sighed curling your arms around, the betrayal of his actions finally beginning to sink in. You didn't want to believe it, the fact that he had done it without telling, keeping this secret knowledge while you were running around looking for the reason that you weren't getting pregnant when he had known the reason the whole time.

"I'm not sorry," he huffed. "But you're not innocent in this either." His tone turned more aggressive as he took a step closer to you.

"What are you talking about?"

He crossed his arms and looked down at you, "I went to a doctor and left a sperm sample for testing." He crouched to your eye level and grabbed your chin tightly to turn your downturned head up to look into his eyes. Your eyes began to fill themselves slowly with tears as you looked into his own disgusted ones. "If it turns out I'm still sterile then we're not keeping this kid." He spat before harshly letting go of your face.

You glared down at the soft material of the sofa, your face staying in the position he had sent it. You felt livid, the fact that he had thrown the idea of an abortion without showing care about your choice fueled the already large amount of anger boiling inside you. Your hands grasped the cushion under you as you turned your head back to face him.

"First off," he turned back to you with surprise from the new aggression in your tone, "it would take a man to raise a child anyway." His shock quickly disappeared, "and vasectomy or not -- you're not a man in my eyes." You stood with more confidence, " second, this baby is growing in my body. And I'll be damned if anyone will tell me what to do with it."

With the final word set, you left while blinking your tears away. You didn't want to see his face anymore, not sure you could handle it. You made sure to slam the door closed on the way out, a sigh escaped your lips as you stepped out onto the bottom of the complex as the light night breeze whisked across your neck.

ding

Your phone went off with the vibration of the notification in your pocket. You hummed in interest, wondering who it could be. If it was Saburo you definitely would not answer it.

Kei <3: hey you ok dove?

You: im ok
You: just could use a friend
You: can we meet up?

Kei <3: absolutely
Kei <3: how about the american diner down the street?

You: sounds perfect

...

"He really said that to you?" Keigo said in disbelief as he faced you. His full attention focused on your retelling of the past events. He was trying his hardest to not become distracted by the vibrant lights decorating the cozy American-styled diner. But he would do so every so often only to hear your discreet giggle once you noticed his tendencies peeking out.

"This is Saburo we're talking about, it shouldn't surprise you." You both exchanged an annoyed look with the ghost of a smile on your lips at the thought of the shared hatred for the male.

"He's the worst." Keigo rolled his eyes with a shake of his head as he leaned back on the seat. "You deserve so much better than him," he huffed and looked away, his wings shaking a bit along with the breath.

"We both do." You spoke softly placing your hand on his arm. He looked back at you with a small smile for a second before it faded, instead, being replaced by a look of worry.

"If he finds out he's not the father, what will you do?"

You hummed in thought as you stared down at the table. Your palm met your cheek as you leaned onto it. "I don't know...I've wanted a baby more than anything, now that I finally have that the possibility of losing it is terrifying."

Keigo's brows scrunched in anger, "Saburo's request is abhorrent." His feathers had started to begin sharpening. His eyes quickly shifted to you; as soon as he caught sight of your saddened frown he quickly shook his growing frustration away. "No good man would do that to his wife."

After those words left his lips his body language began to change. He looked more distracted, you took in the small details and changes on his face as he seemed to go through his own thoughts. Your growing curiosity would soon be satisfied after he gave a small nod as if to confirm his ideas.

"Maybe," his quieter voice shifted your full attention to what he was going to say, "it's finally time for you to leave Saburo... and time for me to leave Niko." His voice finished off into a quieter whisper as he finished.

"What are you saying?" Your eyes widened. The thought of leaving Saburo and instead, being with Keigo created flutters in your stomach. An idea you definitely agreed with and were sincerely hoping Keigo was actually suggesting.

"I want to be with you Y/n," he started, your heart was pounding so loudly you could hear the beats as if they were happening in your ear. You watched as his shy demeanor broke his cool-mannered shell as he grabbed your hand, placing his right one on top and the left on your palm. "Do..." he looked up into your eyes with loving ones, his pupils wider than before, but behind them a mild shade of fear. "you want to be with me too?"