Miakoda

Moving Forward

Hunter's POV

I headed back to the pack house knowing everyone will be running around doing what I've asked them to do. This buys me some time by myself.

I walk through the doors and see people going in and out the kitchen. A young, petit, girl with bright, orange curls and freckled cheeks, comes to me, bowing her head.

"Alpha, welcome back." She says keeping her head bowed.

"Thank you Alison. What's on your mind?" I ask as she slowly raises her eyes from the ground.

"We've noticed the group you brought back with you and wondered if we can get the keys to the store room so we can get more food.... To make sure we have enough for everyone."  She says rushing through her question, out of nervousness for such a large crowd coming in.

" Of coarse you can." I respond, slightly proud that she's asking me for the keys and not if they have to cater for everyone.

I make my way to my office, to the rear of the entrance hall of the pack house. She, thankfully follows me. I grab the keys and hand them to her. She takes them, thanking me and I, remind her to give them to Marcy when she's done.

I exit my office, in dire need to be alone and out of sight. I head straight for my room, which is right at the back of the house.

I open my door, close it and lock it. Then lean my head against it, still holding the door knob. I squeeze my eyes shut as a breath shaking wave of anguish grips my whole being. At first I try to steady my breathing but it's useless. My chest starts heaving quicker and quicker, making me hyperventilate. One wave after the next hits me as the tears start rolling down my face.

Drop after drop getting lost in the carpet at my feet. Just like my heart. The pain doesn't allow me to think. So I resolve to just feeling. My legs losing their strength, I hit the ground. My hands find my face and clutch it. Scared of loosing my face too. Every part of me seems to be vanishing little by little, tear by tear.

Chase, whimpering in my head. It's our pain. His cowering floods me with thoughts.

Maybe I'm weak. Maybe I'm not the warrior she needed. Maybe I'm not enough. Maybe we scare her. Maybe she thinks we will hurt her too.

"Please, stop, please....." Chase begs me. His tone becoming softer to the point of a whisper. "Please, we can't do this. Mate needs us to be strong."  But I feel anything but strong. I feel irrevocably broken by a woman I don't even know what she looks like. Rejected by my own mate.

"No! We were not rejected! Mate was scared and confused!" Chase starts growling out of pain.

I curl up on the floor like a badly wounded animal and just lay there in my own anguish bubble.

Knock... Knock....

"Hunter..." I can barely hear the voice of someone coming from behind my door.

Silence.

Ryder's POV

I knock on my brothers door and call for him but nothing. I place my ear up to his door and hear heavy rapid, breathing mixed with hushed whimpering. Shit!

I pull myself away from his door and run through the entrance hall, passed the games room, through the living room and straight out the back doors. I head around the house towards Hunter's bedroom window. I stop, cup my hands and put my face up against the glass and see him curled up in the fetal position, shaking, right by the door. I grab a hold of his window and shove it open. I climb through his window and run to him.