I hate you

18

Mine

Arthurʼs pov

I laughed and tried to push Jack's hands away as he tickled me.

I took his cheek and looked into his eyes, and hugged him tightly. I never thought I would actually end up like this with the joker when I watched him in the telly at home, or when I thought my life is so fucked up, I won't be able to get a friend that would understand me. And I found my soulmate. How did I deserve that? I have no idea.

I giggled. “What are we gonna do now?” I stroked his hair behind his ear.

“Well, run.” He whispered.

“All those days?” I kept a broad smile on my face. I mean, I don't mind it. He is my home.

“All those days.” He nodded. “You're smiling.”

It was silence for a while between us. Because, I tried to read his expression. And I suddenly couldn't. It was weird and it stressed me out a bit. He wanted to say something, and he was thinking about if he should. I didn't want to interrupt his thoughts, so I just placed a kiss on his forehead. He was sweating, but so was I.

“Marry me.” He burst out suddenly. I took it as a joke at first, so I smiled.

“Sure.”

He barely let me finish my answer, and interrupted me. “No. I mean it.” He smiled.

I stopped smiling and looked at his face, he was serious, his eyes said it. I can't say anything expect; this is fucking crazy.

“Marry me, cupcake.” He whispered to me again and brought his lips to mine, kissing me soothingly. I leaned up to him, my hand stroked his scar on his cheek as I kissed him back.

“I'll marry you.” I mumbled through our kiss, accidentally breaking it.

“Wait, really? You- don't need to answer right now.” He struggled. Damn, he's nervous. But to be honest, I expected him to ask this. I don't know why, I just did. Because it's a crazy idea, and we both love madness. Expect I've never been married to anyone in life.

“Really, really. I'll be yours.” I agreed once more.

He hugged me tightly. And I returned. Soon, I felt him laying down next to me, watching the sky. He had a smile on his face, it was dark, I didn't see it, but I knew it. I cuddled to his chest, close under his neck and he rubbed my back.

“Are we engaged?” I whispered, playing with his shirt.

“Mhm.” He hummed. “When we get out of this town, I'll let you choose a ring.”

I felt my chest high from happiness. It felt so weirdly good, I never felt it in my life. “I can't wait.” I yawned.

This day. Was so meaningful and crazy. And I'm so tired. Holding Jack close to myself, I managed to fall asleep very fast. Even without my medication.
_____

“Please, don't do it.” I begged.

“Don't talk you little shit. I'll tie you. Right here, to this radiator.” A mysterious man talked back to me. Well, he wasn't mysterious to me. I knew who he was. It was my mother's second boyfriend.

I felt tears running down my face. Why was I here? What's going on? I'm so confused. I don't know what's happening.

I felt prickly pain on my shoulder, realizing that he hit me with the belt he held. And again, on my face this time. I cried, covering my face.

“Please. Don't! Mom!” I cried for help. I always cried for help, but from what I remember no one was here to save me. My mother always just stood there and watched him hurt me.

Someone took my hand. I flinched, because I was scared, but when I looked up, I saw it was... Jack.

He picked me up and I hid behind him, laughing, trying to convince myself to not laugh.

“That's enough.” He said.

“Napier. Why do you always have to put your nose where it's not your business!”

“It is enough of my business. Stop hurting him. Or I'll convince him to run away.” Jack argued with him for a while, until I felt him leading me outside. I loved the outside. It was so calming.

“Are you okay?” He asked after some while.

“No. I missed you.” I answered as If I already knew him. Which was even more confusing for me.

He smiled. “I was thinking about you.”

I blushed a lot, looking down. “R-Really?” I struggled. Crush. I had crush on him.

“Like everyday. Cupcake.” He said and jumped up a tree. Oh, I remember this tree. Me and Jack used to sit on it and talk about our problems. Mostly at nights, we used to sneak out of our terrible households.

He gently took my hand and helped me climb up, so I sat next to him.

“I want to have a good life.” I sighed.

“We both do.” He answered.

I felt my heart beat sped up as I decided to lay my head on his chest. I didn't know if it was a good idea at first, but then I felt he pulled away.

“I'm sorry-” I wanted to instantly apologize, but he took my wounded cheek from earlier and pulled me into a soft kiss.

Oh. My. God.
_____

I gasped, looking around myself. I tried to proceed this dream, I was thinking for a minute or two until I realized it was morning and Jack was nowhere to be found. This dream wasn't a dream, it was a memory. I knew it because I remembered it.

I picked myself up and ran to the train track. I knew he would be there, somewhere. But until I got there, I hit him accidentally before.

“Arthur-”

“Why didn't you tell me! Why didn't you tell me more about our childhood!” I snapped at him.

“What should I tell you?” He raised a brow. “There's nothing to tell.” He said and continued his way.

“Wait!” I grabbed his shirt and looked up at him. “Why didn't you tell me that we were in love when we were young...” I whispered.

“...We were not.” He sighed.

“I know we were. Jack. We kissed. Remember?” I looked at him desperately. I wanted it to be true. I wanted him to approve it.

“Okay, Okay, but how do you remember? I thought you forgot everything?” His voice softened again.

“I had a dream tonight. My memories are coming back ever since we met again.” I stroked his shirt and kissed his chest.

“Well. Is my fiancé hungry?” He picked me up and wrapped my legs around his waist so I could reach his face.

I chuckled. “Very.”

How could I forget such a things that happened between me and Jack when we were teenagers? I thought he was my first kiss-- he was, but he was my first kiss years ago!

Oh damn.