Porcelain

Chapter 41

Estelle started at the plate in front of her. She'd eaten some, but the longer it sat there the less appetizing it looked. She was lost in thought. She couldn't just live with the Curtis brothers indefinitely, that she knew for sure, but beyond that, she didn't know. Half of her wanted to go find Dally, the rest of her wanted to wait for him to find his way back to her. If he wanted to. That way, he could live his life none the wiser that he was going to be a father, until he wanted her back in his life.

She frowned. There wasn't really a right choice here, was there? Whatever she did, there were downsides. She could feel Darry's frown of disapproval at her not eating, but she ignored it for the time being.

"You okay, Estelle?" Sodapop asked.

She smiled. "I'm fine, just not that hungry right now."

Just because people were concerned, she forced herself to chew and swallow a few more bites.

She was interrupted by the door slamming, announcing the arrival of Two-Bit.

He looked her up and down, and she hoped he didn't make any comments about her being less skinny than the last time she'd been around.

"Why's there blood in your jacket?"

"Well hello to you too, Two-Bit. But I know my nose looks terrible and that I've got black eyes, and you can probably put it together."

He snickered. "Babydoll the street menace got his ass beat."

She rolled her eyes. "Estelle the girl with an ever shortening patience is very strong and has a knife in her pocket."

He put his hands up in mock surrender. "Sorry ma'am, didn't mean to say something rude."

She smiled. "Now that's more like it! Take a lesson from Two-Bit, you don't have to be an asshole about everything," she said, sarcastically looking over at Darry, who was pretending she wasn't even there.

Ponyboy and Sodapop looked confusedly between all three of them.

Estelle laughed. "None of y'all worry your pretty little heads, I'm just being petty. You're all fine."

"So you're not gonna murder me?"

"Not planning on it, already got enough of those under my belt."

"Okay. Just wanted to make sure, didn't plan on my life ending like this."

"You have to admit, it would be a pretty neat way to go out, though."

"No it wouldn't, it would be pathetic! Killed by a girl at the breakfast table!"

"Now do I look like a girl?"

"I mean-"

"Don't answer that, the answer is no, not really, especially if it's dark."

Two-Bit grinned. "You don't look like a girl, especially when it's dark," he parroted.

She nodded approvingly. "Hey Two-Bit, you want this? I'm not hungry," she said, smoothly handing off her plate of food.

As Two-Bit ate her breakfast for her and took the attention off of her, she went to brush her teeth and fix her hair. It was starting to get long, so even if she didn't really want to, she too now had to use copious amounts of grease to keep it slicked back.

"God, if I was a Greaser before, I'm a Greasest now," she grumbled, walking out of the bathroom.

"Where are you headed?" Darry asked her.

She shrugged. "I dunno. Out. I feel pretty decent, I thought I'd grab my dog and go on a walk while I still feel good."

"Why wouldn't you feel good?" Sodapop asked as she mentally face palmed.

"Cause I got fucking pummeled last night, that's why. I know I'm gonna feel like shit today, I wanna take advantage of the time I don't."

He accepted her answer, and she didn't meet Darry's eyes as she quickly left the house.

_____
Dally woke up with a pounding headache. It didn't help that he was sitting under a tree, without taking care of any of his cuts or bruises from the night before.

He groaned as he stood up. He should have thought ahead and just gone to the Curtis' after that fight, but then again Estelle would-

He stopped. Why didn't he go after her?

Again.

But was he really that dense? She was there! Right in front of him! And he let her get away. He let her walk away again.

With new motivation, he started walking towards the Curtis house, ignoring how his muscles and bones ached complained.

Sodapop was walking out as he entered. He did a double-take as Dally marched past him into the house, the first time he'd even been there in the months since Estelle was gone.

"Hello Dally," Darry said evenly, as if he hadn't been gone for months. "There's food on the stove if you want some."

Dally scowled. "You know why I'm here, I see the car."

"You just missed her, she's out at the moment," he replied, taking in Dally's whole appearance. "But in the meantime, why don't you get yourself cleaned up? Some of those cuts don't look so good."

Dally's scowl deepened. "Fine," he snarled, stomping to the bathroom.

_____
Estelle walked quickly down the broken sidewalk as Oliver half-dragged her back towards the Curtis house, which to her meant really one thing, that Dally was there.

She looked over herself, and the clothes she was wearing. She was wearing a pair of baggy jeans she'd stolen from Sodapop a long time ago, a baggy t-shirt that she'd probably stolen from Two-Bit, and one of her own trusty jean jackets. Her hair was slicked back, so other than her face having changed, she looked as much like a Greaser as she ever had.

She opened the door, not slamming it this time. She took Oliver off his leash, and he zoomed towards the back of the house. Despite the weight of the situation, she had to chuckle because even if Dally didn't enjoy the puppy, Ollie adored Dally.

She heard him yell as Ollie tackled him, and she laughed.

She sobered up quickly though as Dallas Winston rounded the corner.

"Estelle," he said quietly. "It's, uh, it's been a while."

"Dallas," she said, fighting the urge to go fling her arms around him, and try and fix his every worry. It hurt to see his bloodshot eyes and the dark circles under them, and to see the large cuts and bruises. Those were her fault. She brought her eyes back to his eyes, and her heart broke again seeing the empty and broken look in them.