Too far gone to pray

Chapter three

Louis POV (after gym class)

Gym was the worst class in the entire world. Scratch that religious education class was the worst. Gym class met he had to change in front of other guys. Changing in front of other guys meant temptation, and he can't give into temptation. It was wrong it was sinful. He was told by his teachers, the priest, and his father that homosexuality was wrong. If everyone said it, it had to be true right? So, he had to fight his urges and go against his temptations. He had slip ups before, that can't happen anymore. He cannot go back to that place; he cannot slip up again.

He was standing in the corner of the locker room, trying to get changed without looking at anyone else. Looking led to temptation, and like he said before, that was a terrible idea. There was a new boy at school, he was undeniable good looking. He had the cutest curls that you just wanted to run your hands through. As much as he dreamt of it, it would never ever happen. The boy was probably straight, and probably would be repulsed by him. He was the only abnormality in this town, he was the only one who felt like this.

He got changed quickly and tried to slip out without being noticed by anyone. He went to his next class which of course was the repulsive religion class. He shouldn't be saying that his father would kill him if he heard him say that. He just hated that he had to hear the same drivel that he hears from everyone else. He had to hear it day in and day out, he wished he would just get a break from it all.

He sat in the front row of the class. He didn't want to, but his father said he had to. His father said that this was the most important class and that he needed to pay attention. He understood what he meant. Maybe if he just paid attention in class it would help to fix him. Everything would be fine if he were like everyone else normal and ordinary. He just needed to keep his feelings under control and follow what he was taught.

Class started and the Bible was projected onto the wall. He stiffened and prepared for what he was going to hear in class. The teacher said that today they would be going over Leviticus. He knew every lesson, every parable, everything in the bible, and there was none he hated more than Leviticus. Leviticus chapter 18 verse 22 was ingrained in his mind. He read it over and over every day, he had to. When the Jonathan, one of the boys in the class, read it aloud his heart ached. He wished it didn't, but it did.

After an agonizingly awful class, school was finally over. He went to the school's chapel after school, like he always did. His father would kill him if he didn't go to church every day. He walked into the small chapel and kneeled at one of the old wooden pews. He bowed his head and began to pray.

He did the normal prayers of course Hail Mary's, Our father's, and what not. He also prayed for something, it was more of a wish than a prayer, but he thought it still counted. He prayed to be normal, he prayed to get rid of all his negative temptations. He prayed to not feel how he feels. He hoped if he could pray enough and hard enough, he wouldn't end up burning in hell. He didn't want to end up there, and as his father said if he didn't change, he would end up in hell. So, he prayed, and he prayed hard.

After he had been at the chapel for an hour and a half he went home. This was normal for him, some viewed it as strange, but after a while it is just part of the routine. His parents were religious, more religious than most. He had to abide by their rules, so he went to church and read the bible every day. Once he was sick and couldn't go, that was a very bad day for him. He got lectured for hours by his father about how awful and sinful he was. He didn't mean to be sinful, he just accidently sinned. If he could not sin, he would, but he couldn't, so he prayed.

When he walked through the front door of his home, he was met by one of his younger sisters barreling into him. It was daisy she was giggling and laughing up a storm.