You'll Never Be Whole Until You Lose Control- Spencer Reid

14.) on track

But strictly speaking, I'm still on track

Strictly speaking, I'm holding on

One other minor setback

But strictly speaking, I'm still on track

And all of my dreams are still in sight

Strictly speaking, I've got my whole life

I lost a wheel a while back

But strictly speaking, I'm still on track

Trouble keeps falling in my lap

Strung out again, but still on track- On Track, Tame Impala

Spencer

The walls of the men's super max echoed with Cat's voice.

Though I strode freely down the hall of barred rooms, my own mind had imprisoned me. I stood next to Emily in a black suit, but it felt like I was wearing the blue prison uniform once again. I could have sworn I saw the fabrics change before my eyes beneath the flickering fluorescents.

"You know you don't have to do this," Emily had said as we gathered our things from the squad room.

"It's my job, Emily."

"Spencer, none of us want to see you hurt."

"I said I'd be fine," I didn't mean to snap at her, but it came out that way.

I wasn't fine.

I wasn't fine at all.

It felt like I was being suffocated, like the nightmares had come true and I was once again stuck behind the bars. I could almost feel the hand cuffs dig into my wrists.

I could hear Cat's laughter like she was walking beside me instead of Prentiss.

'See, Spencie? You're one of them,' her eyes bore into my very soul before she rested her head on my shoulder, clinging to my arm. 'We really do deserve each other, you know. You'll never be free after the things you've done."

I closed my eyes tightly as the interrogation room door closed automatically behind us.

When I opened them, she was standing in the corner, watching me like a hawk eyeing its prey. I shook my head to clear the image, focusing solely on the inmate we were meeting with.

After ten minutes, we knew we weren't getting anything out of him. It was infuriating, my rage boiling beneath the surface of my skin. Prentiss could see I was beginning to unravel, exchanging worried glances my way as I spoke.

"We know these crimes are connected back to you,"I leaned over the table, palms flat on the cold metal surface.

He just grinned, sadistically, enjoying the rise he got out of me. It was all just a game to him.

'And I always win,' Cat's voice sneered from behind my shoulder.

That's when I couldn't take it anymore. My tremulous hands balled into fists and slammed onto the table, shaking the rickety metal for all it was worth. "When we find out these murders are tied to you, I will personally nail you to the goddamn wall my-fucking-self. They're just children!"

"Reid," Prentiss's hand rested on my shoulder, pulling me back.

But he just laughed.

And so did Cat in the corner.

Anna

"Hey, Spencer, it's Anna- well you know that already because of caller ID and now I'm just sounding dumb," I groaned into my phone. Smooth. Why are you the way that you are? "Um, anyway, I have a gut feeling that you're having a bad day- call me later. If you want. Fuck, I can't leave voice messages to save my life. Okay, bye."