Unexpected

29. Helen

We had a great time in this last hour. I enjoyed every single sigh and whispered word in my ear, the warmth of his body pressed against mine. What I felt was not just pleasure, but something more.

Right now, as he strokes my hair and my head is resting on his chest, I feel our hearts beating in unison and our coordinated breaths.

I'm scared. No, I'm terrified. I'm afraid this sort of game we're playing may end and become a serious thing that we both have to deal with.

If it were just the two of us in the world then with pleasure, let's fall in love, fight, love each other, fall in love again and again, I don't care. But that's not the case, and I don't know what's in his head, or mine for that matter. I just know that I have to get away from him and not allow emotions to take over.

I try to move his arm gently but I can't, it's too heavy. I slowly roll up to the edge of the bed being careful not to pull the sheets with me. I manage to get out of bed without waking him.

Where the hell are my clothes? Okay, the dress is on the floor in the hall, I remember it. But the bra and the panties? They'll in the between the sheets.

I search through the sheets without disturbing Harry. Perfect, found panties. Now the bra. Maybe it's on the ground, on his side of the bed. Yes, only that it was under the bed, but still, found.

Quickly I put them on and quietly leave his room. On the ground next to the door there is my dress. I put it on and pull the zipper up as far as I can. I go downstairs and take my things; I don't wear shoes to avoid making noises.

"Helen, where are you going?" I hear Harry's voice behind me.

Shit. "Home," I reply dryly. I didn't expect him to wake up.

"Home?" he joins me and I turn my back to him. He lifts my whole zip up. "Why do you want to go home? You asked me to bring you here." He takes me from behind and makes me turn towards him.

I roll my eyes. "I know, but now I want to leave." I haven't answered the real question yet, because I can't tell him the real reason why I want to leave.

He raises his eyebrows, surprised. "So you only came here to fuck me?" He's frowning now, his tone higher than him. But what is he saying... "Did you think I would feel better by fucking me after—" He stops here, running a hand through his hair.

We're so close that I have to lift my chin to be able to look him in the eye. "Harry, no. It wasn't for that. I don't give a damn about fucking you, honestly. It just happened." I stop for a moment to catch my breath. "And it was also a mistake." I take a few steps back. "I stayed so as not to leave you alone. What happened with your mother?" I finally ask him, I couldn't resist.

He snorts, irritated. "Don't pull my mother in, we're talking about us."

Us? Fuck, that's what scares me. "Us? Harry, please I want to go home, leave me alone."

He gives a wry laugh. "Are you going on foot?"

Quite right. "Will you take me there?" I ask him, annoyed by this whole situation.

"No," he crosses his arms.

I hate him. "Fuck you, come on, I want to go home."

"I don't want you to," he says with conviction.

I glare at him, I feel the anger increase. "You don't want me to? Listen, I'm going on foot." I head for the door.

He immediately takes me by the wrist. "It's one in the morning, you're not going anywhere fucking alone at this time," he says in an authoritative voice.

I burst out laughing. "Please, you look like my father. Let me go home."

He pulls me closer to him, our bodies are almost attached. "I already told you I don't want you to."

"I don't give a damn if you don't—"

"I need you, Helen." I feel his warm breath on my lips.

Oh, please. "It's not true."

He leans more towards my face to kiss me, but first he says, "It is as it is true that I can't stand you when you do this."

I want to kiss him, but I can't let myself be carried away by temptation and blow everything up again. Reluctantly I walk away and pick up the phone to call someone to pick me up and take me home.

"What are you doing?" Harry asks me, his back against the wall.

"I'm calling someone to come get me, since you're an asshole," I explain.

As soon as he sees me typing Daniel's name into the contact search bar, he jumps over and takes the phone from my hands. "I don't believe it..." he shakes his head. "Come on, just don't call him. Then I'd be the asshole." He puts on a T-shirt that was on the sofa, takes the house and car keys, holding me tightly by the wrist, we leave the house.

I'm barefoot, but as soon as I get home I'll take a shower. Once I get in the car and put the belt on, my cell phone vibrates in my hand.

Dad?

I answer. "Hey, why are you calling at one in the morning?" I ask him immediately, it's strange.

I hear him sigh on the other side of the phone. "I wanted to ask you if you could come home tomorrow and stay for a few days."

I motion to Harry not to leave until I close the call. "On such short notice? Did something happen?" I am getting worried.

"No, we just want to see you and you know Keira's birthday is these days. Will you come?" he asks me in a hopeful voice. I suspect there is something underneath. Keira was my best friend when I was in Vancouver, but we haven't heard from each other for long. I don't think daddy knows in fact.

"Well, yes, only I'll stay one night and that's it. Monday I have rehearsals for the song and I can't miss it." Harry glances at me.

"All right. Where are you?" he says without any assumptions.

"Home," I lie.

"With Jade?" Why is he asking all these questions?

"Yup. Dad, you are weird. How much wine did you drink?" I tell him jokingly.

"Not a drop," he laughs. "See you tomorrow, honey."

"Okay, bye," and I end the call.

Harry starts the engine. The way from his home to my home is silent.

"See you tomorrow?" he asks me as he brakes in front of the apartment building.

I shake my head. "No, I'm going to Vancouver. And then after tonight I don't think that's the case."

He looks at me with an unreadable expression. "You are right."

I get out of the car. "Good night."

I put my shoes back on because the road is much dirtier here. Harry doesn't wait for me to come in to leave.

Oh no, Jade is home, her stuff is out there. But she is in her room, I hope she doesn't hear me and that she is sleeping.

I go to the bathroom and take a quick shower. In the meantime, I review the things that happened in the last ten minutes in my mind. I brush my teeth, put on a T-shirt and go to the alarm clock for six in the morning. Finally I fall asleep confused, angry and with the desire to send everyone to fuck.