Unexpected

41. Helen

I wanna dance.

I head to that sort of dance floor that the guys have arranged, where so many other people dance and have fun.

I think I might be the only person alone in this crowd. Around me there are groups of friends who laugh and joke as they move to the rhythm of the music, couples who kiss deeply... But the moment I start to move, everything around me seems to blur.

Time goes slower and I don't feel weird as my hips move smoothly and my eyes are closed.

Then I feel someone touch me, put an arm around my waist from behind; I can't see who he is.

With my eyes still closed, I turn my head towards him and my nose is buried into his neck. I breathe in the scent of him; feels familiar...

I know this perfume.

I saw the bottle on his nightstand and breathed into his neck enough times to learn to recognize it. Montblanc Legend.

It just means one person for me: Harry.

I snap my eyes open and I realize who I am in front of. Him. I don't believe it, it's not possible.

His blue eyes look darker in the dim light, his lips parted as he stares at me, his warm breath on my face and wisps of dark brown hair falling across his forehead.

He's here. Right here.

Suddenly I'm short of air, I feel my eyes burn from the tears that try to pour down my cheeks.

I hear his voice. "Helen... hi," he says simply.

A tear falls heavy on my face and he immediately notices it; he puts his hand on my cheek and wipes it with his thumb. "Hey, hey."

I don't know why I'm crying, I just know I'm drunk, and relieved to have seen him again. But I can't deal with it right now. I can't deal with him.

"No... not now, please" and I make space in the crowd.

Despite staggering on my heels, I manage to get out of there safe and sound. I felt suffocated.

But in a moment I'm soaking wet. It is raining. I start walking briskly towards my house — it's not far from here, but not a stone's throw away either.

A voice. "Helen! Wait up!" Harry.

I don't stop, although my feet are dying and I think I might pass out at any moment.

But he runs and in a moment he caught up with me. I feel his hand touch my right shoulder from behind and his labored breathing. "Let me get you a ride home, please." He stands in front of me. "You can't go around like that at this time" and he looks at me from top to bottom. "You're drunk," he points out, making me understand that he wasn't referring to my dress.

"Yes, and I can't be near you while I am," I tell him. I don't think clearly, and I miss him so much that I'd throw myself into his arms immediately. No. I have to resist.

He sighs, the sound of the rain muffling his voice. "Just let me take you home, I don't want anything else from you."

I look down and then look him straight in the eye. "I've got this already" and I go beyond it.

A frustrated sound comes from his lips. "Helen, stop!" he yells behind me.

I continue to walk, stubbornly. But after two steps I stop, a thought crosses my mind.

I'm drunk, I probably won't remember anything tomorrow and I have so many things to spit in his face. If I exaggerate, I'll blame alcohol.

I turn and take a few steps towards him, my heels clacking on the sidewalk.

He looks at me, his expression sad and almost... guilty? I don't know, but all the confidence with which I had turned to him is now gone, and I feel weak, mentally and physically.

My legs can barely hold me, I feel cold and dizzy.

"Let me take you home, you have purple lips. You're not okay, let's go," Harry tells me as he approaches. He puts one arm under my back and the other under my knees. I let him, I don't have the strength to protest.

He walks, towards where I don't know, but shortly after I find myself in his car with him.

My eyes are closed, my head resting on the headrest, as Harry places something on my legs. "Put it on, it's dry. You need to warm up, I turned on the hot air."

A sweatshirt of him, perhaps the one he took off before entering the crowd, because only now I realize that he is wearing a white short-sleeved T-shirt.

"Thanks," I tell him after wearing it.

I close my eyes again and in no time before Harry can leave the parking lot, the sound of the rain and the running engine lull me to sleep.