20 Questions

Chapter 36

When we make it back to the lodge, the guys tell me to change into my warmest clothes and prepare for an "epic snowball fight". Hunter goes back to his room and tells me that he will meet me in the lobby in ten minutes. I rush back to my room to change because I cannot wait to get out of these wet underwear. I put on my thermal underwear and cover them with jeans, a hoodie, my thickest socks, and scarf. I grab my hat, coat and gloves and look over at the clock. I still have a couple minutes before I go out so I decide to call my parents. My dad answers first and puts it on speakerphone so my mom can join the conversation.

"Soooooo, what did you all think of Hunter?" I ask my parents, desperately seeking their approval.

"I thought he was very handsome," my mom answers. "He really seems to like you a lot, I can tell."

"Yes, he is very handsome. And you know, I really like him a lot as well. Mom, if I'm being honest with you, I have fallen in love with him." I mentally prepare myself for the argument that will inevitably ensue. "I already know what you are going to say though. You'll say that you don't believe me and that it is too soon to love someone that you just met. You'll tell me that there's no way that I know enough about him to have feelings like that. Believe me, I didn't think that it was possible either. With that being said, I may not know every single detail of his life, but I can't deny what is real and how I feel. So, go ahead and tell me how crazy I am for professing my love this soon- "

My mom cuts me off with annoyance in her tone. "Jenna, you have no idea what I am going to say. And for your information, you are wrong...very wrong. I fell in love with your dad the first time I laid eyes on him. I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with a man who I had only known for an hour. When you know, you just know. I think Hunter is lovely. I do caution you to be careful, but I would do that with any man, whether it be someone you just met or someone you've known your whole life. I haven't ever seen your face light up like it did when you Facetimed me and your dad. He looks like he really makes you happy." I'm surprised, but I know I shouldn't be. I was blessed with two remarkably understanding and supportive parents.

"Mom, Dad...he does. I've been so lonely since Jansen died," I tell them, my voice beginning to crack. My world began and ended with him. He was the biggest part of my life, my every memory centered around him.

"I know you have, baby girl. Your dad and I have been so worried."

"I know. It worried me, too. Hunter makes me so happy though, even excited about things again. I never realized how much of myself I lost until I met him. Without trying to sound like Jerry Maguire, he essentially completes me," I laugh at my reference, giddy as a school girl. "He makes me feel safe and loved and respected and all those things people wait their whole lives for. I can't wait for you guys to meet him in person and see all those wonderful things that I have this week. "

My dad finally cuts my mom off to speak, "We can't wait to meet him either. We are excited to meet the man that has put the fire back in our Jenna." A roaring belch blows through the end of the line.

"Dad, are you still having indigestion?"

"I am, but it's not that big of a deal. I probably just need to go get some acid reflux medicine. I'm fine. So, what time will you be home because we miss you? Oh, and is Hunter coming back with you?"

"Dad, stop diverting the conversation. I really think that you should make an appointment with your doctor. Indigestion doesn't last this long."

"I will, I will. I was just waiting for the holidays to be over. I'll make an appointment first thing next week. I promise. Now answer my questions," he demands. He's a frustrating one.

"My flight takes off at five in the morning, so I'll probably be back right after lunch with layovers and whatnot. I miss you guys, too."

I wrap up my phone call and head out to the lobby to meet the guys. Something isn't sitting right with me regarding my dad. He's never had problems with indigestion and acid reflux before. I can't put my finger on it, but I don't like the feeling I have in my gut. I want him to get bloodwork and an EKG when he goes to see his doctor. I plan on telling him that with our next conversation.

There's a large field next to the lodge where I am assuming the "epic snowball fight" will be taking place. I am paired up with Kevin and Patrick and we will battle against Hunter, Justin and Bryson. Hunter's team walks to the opposite side of the field and Kevin has started building some sort of wall that I am assuming we will hide behind with reload. The snow is just wet enough to build the perfect snowball so I bend down and help my team build the wall. I see Hunter's team doing the same and it makes me wonder how many years this tradition has gone on.

I turn and ask my team, "So how did this tradition start...like the movies and snowball fights?"

"Hell, I think the snowball fights started early on at the orphanage," Patrick explains. "On the years that it didn't snow, we had alternatives. We kept every assignment that we did at school throughout the year and would use the paper to crumple up as makeshift snowballs. We would get some presents if we were chosen as an angel on the angel tree or some charity case like that, but it was never something that we would count on. The employees at the orphanage would try to get us small things, but there's only so much excitement you can have about Lifesaver candy books or a plastic candy cane filled with M&M's. So, we found something that we knew would make all of us happy every year. That's how the snowball fights came about. The movies started as we got older. None of us had a car, obviously, but we would take the bus to the movies."

I'm grateful for the glimpse into their childhood, but the sorrow and guilt quickly set in. Every Christmas, I could count on presents under the tree. All the while, the only thing they could count on was paper snowballs and perhaps a chance of snow. I guess my face gave away my mixed emotions.

"Jenna, it's ok," Kevin says. "I know it sounds terrible, but it really wasn't as bad as it sounds. I mean, yeah, we would have loved to wake up every Christmas morning to Santa and gifts and all that other stuff, but we had each other and for that we are grateful. It was a Christmas miracle that we didn't all turn out to be in jail or dead. Well, most of us..."

I know they are referring to Josh, a tragic reminder of a young man failed by so many. My heart still breaks thinking of their lost brother and how things could have turned out so much differently for him. My thoughts are interrupted with Patrick and Kevin wrapping their arms around me in the warmest embrace.