20 Questions

Chapter 11

The stroll to the shopping center is cold, but my body is still hotter than the seventh circle of Hell. Not in a million years did I expect that to happen. I think about this backward baseball cap-wearing, mystery tattoo-having, push me up against a wall-kissing, sexy specimen of a man and apparently the impression I made on him in such a short time. I mean, I know I want to know more about him, but is this what I need right now? I came here as an escape, a vacation with just me time. Do I even want a relationship or whatever this turns out to be? Maybe this will just be a little fling and if it is, am I ok with that?

It's my first day here and I am already putting too much pressure on myself. Maybe he just felt like kissing me and kissing me is exactly what he did. It's possible that's all he wanted. I need to stop overthinking everything. I need to just stop thinking, period.

I wonder in and out of the cute little shops that line the snowy street. I love this place. Jansen would have loved it, too. We would be hopping through these shops, laughing as we pick out ridiculous Christmas gifts for each other and I would throw a hat on him just to irritate him and mess up his hair. I miss him and I really miss him around Christmas time. He would have fit in with those obnoxious guys at the lodge. He would have told me to go for it with Hunter if it made me happy. We always wanted happiness for each other, that part was easy.

As I pass by one of the local boutiques, something shiny catches my eye. In the front window of the store hangs a gorgeous red cocktail dress, sequins traveling from the plunging neckline to the lace-trimmed hem. I hadn't bought anything to wear for Christmas Eve and dressing up on that day has indeed always been one of my traditions, so I open the door and walk into the store. I pad over to the dress rack and run my hands over the course fabric. It truly is beautiful. A young girl walks over, introduces herself and asks if I would like to try on the dress. When I hesitate for a hot minute, she responds by telling me how "ravishing" I would look in it.

She must work on commission.

I decide to take her up on the offer and she leads me to the dressing room. I hang up my purse and start to undress. As I gaze into the mirror, my eyes travel to the redness around my hips were Hunter's hands were, lifting me up against the wall with an insatiable hunger. A fire ignites within me again and my mind goes back to the passionate kiss.

Man, that boy has done a number on me.

I count down the minutes until I can have his hands on me again, remembering his unwavering confidence that turned me into a hormonal and boy-crazy teenage girl. I slip on the red dress and turn around to the mirror, gazing upon a girl that I barely recognize. I blush because never in my life have I felt this sexy. The dress is short, shorter than I am used to, but tasteful. It shows just enough cleavage to be flattering, but not enough that somebody would try to shove dollar bills in it. Before I put too much thought into it, I get dressed and walk up to the register to pay for the dress. I nearly stroke out when she gives me the total, my arm shaking as I hand over my debit card.

After I've floated in and out of a few more shops, I decide that's enough shopping for the day. I head back to the lodge with a few shopping bags and a truckload of desire. I got a little taste of something I liked with Hunter and I want to go back for seconds as soon as possible. I open the door to the lodge and immediately scan the room for that sexy boy and his obnoxious friends, feeling the pang of disappointment when I don't see him or them. After dropping off my purchases in my room, I journey back to the bar to get some food.

A short time later, the young bartender delivers my burger and fries to the couches next to the fireplace that I have determined is my new favorite spot in the whole world. I nibble on my food while I people-watch in the lobby. There are families, friends, lovers, and business associates. Each person is here for one reason or another, mine being.... hell, I don't know anymore. It was supposed to be rest, relaxation, self-discovery and separation from the pure agony of my hometown life after Jansen's death. I am relaxing and working on all the rest of those things, but there is a new reason for this big fat smile on my face.