Not Yours | H.S

fifty six

I slowly and carefully left Harry's car as I made my way up his driveway and into the house that smells like home. Amara and Louis were here waiting for us, and ran to get the bags.

With the baby in arms, they urged me that that's all I carry in. I didn't complain and I didnt fight, grateful to the fact Penelope was all I had to deal with for the next week or so.

As much as I silently hoped it would go this way, I still paid my respect to each and every single one of them immensely. Harry, he had stayed with me the entire hospital stay and refused to leave, even for one night.

Louis and amara were so amazing, talking me out of my boredom and visiting anytime they could. Amara still had school work she needed to catch up on and Louis still had work, I didn't want to refrain from them and I assured them they could leave whenever they needed. They listened of course, but why wouldn't they?

Amara was going to take time off school and Harry was going to go. He's already lost one day and i'm scared people will catch on out little tricks, but it seems to all be working so far.

It was Sunday afternoon and I was heading straight for the couch, carrying Penny with me connected to my chest. I was nervous to breastfeed without the nurses, but it was just a learning curve I was bound to get the hang of sooner, rather than later.

We had discussed what would happen. So far, Harry was going to go regardless, unless i was really really panicking, Louis would stay home if I was a little uptight about things and was on edge. Amara would stay even if I was in the best mood.

I didn't want to go upstairs, not for at least a day or two. Prior to coming home, my phone call to Amara really consisted of 'please make sure evrrythings ready!' I was just so fatigued and had too many emotions running through me to know what I wanted - apart from being comfortable as soon as I stepped into home.

I was happy to see a bunch of soft-looking pillows and thick blankets spread across his couch. Amara, would most definitely be sleeping with me, you can just tell by the way it is all laid out. Her little bassinet was brought out here and I smile in joy as my eyes fall over the scenery.

There were no noises of crying babies, or any machines, buttons or nurses. It was all silent, all I had to do was get rid of the noise in my head that remained. I'm sure that will leave before I wake up though.

I sat myself down, and sunk right into Louis and Harry's couch.

I looked down at Penelope, her whole hand was tight around my one finger. I was filled with smiles when she looked at me, her bright blue eyes were nothing but beautiful to look at.

Out of knowledge I already knew that might change, but two separate nurses said they most likely will. It would take a few months but I was sure to look out. I was so so grateful she had none of tobys features, apart from his nose and eyes.

Her nose was the same as mine though. It was just coincidental we had fairly the same facial structure. For her eyes, the blue could remind me of anyone, including Louis. It was very easy to make a common eye colour resemble with someone less harmful.

Her little tongue moved around in her pink lips. And her head fis right into my arms when I hold her. I was scared, she was fragile. Any new mother would be scared, but I was taking in the reality check quite well for the moment.

I pulled my eyes away from my little doll, to Amara who was approaching my way. She gives me a bright big smile, scrunching her nose with the act. She comes up behind my shoulders, where I can't twist my head to see her.

However, she comes right into my senses again as her hands fall above my shoulder and meet at Penelope. Playing with her little chin and rubbing the top of her head. Amaras face is right next to mine, and I can hear the little happy contained laughs she's quietly letting out.