Chasing Kate

Chapter 18. Duty Calls.

"Hello?" I said, confused that I was imagining things.

"Lucas? Is that you? What's wrong" the voice said.

"I want to use so bad, so fucking bad. I can't sleep, I just keep thinking about these pills. The god damn pills that have such a hold on me. I am trying, so damn hard. I can't resist it. Tell me how to resist it." I pleaded.

"Lucas, you need to calm down and you need to listen to me. "

The voice continued on the other line.

"You Lucas Wesley Are Better than this! Do you hear me? I know you what to use, I know the admiration for the high it gives you is begging you to come back, but you have came such a long way. Don't mess up your progress. "

"Where are you? "

"I'm at home, in my kitchen." I said.

"Where are the drugs, Lucas?"

"In... In my kitchen." I said hesitantly.

"Go get them. "

"What? No!" I questioned.

"Yes, go. Please. Get them, flush them down the toilet. You can do this."

"I can't." I huffed.

"You can. Do it for me, please" the voice pleaded.

That's all I had to hear. I got my sorry pity train ass up and went to the kitchen and searched floor. 1....2.... 3. I ran into my bathroom and without thinking another second, I tossed them and flushed then down the drain.

My throat was dry and my breathing was harsh as I slid down my bathroom wall and tears fell from my eyes.

"I did it." I said shakily.

"I knew you could, Lu. I'm so proud of you."

"Thank you, Kate. I need you so much."

This Angel, this beautiful soul. I needed here so much in my life, I would spend forever seeking a way to fit it, in any form her life.

**************************

I woke up and I felt accomplished. I felt so much relief that I had pushed myself to not use last night. No one could understand the depth of my WANT to use, I didn't NEED it anymore.

I've always this gravitational pull toward Kate-Anna. But who was I to defy gravity, if our souls would never connect the same way.

I know I need to work on myself, before thinking of anyone else. I know I NEED to worry about my Problems, my stresses, my life before anyone else.

Did I miss OSU? Hell yes. I missed my boys.

Did I miss the parties? Absolutely. They were a great time.

Did I miss the girls? I'm a man, of course I missed the girls. I have needs but I wasn't about to subject myself to 125 girls because I have some screwed up issues in my head.

After work that Friday, I came back to my apartment. My mother had phoned me to let me know, Dinner was going to be late, because she was watching the little boy down the street.

My phone beeped on the kitchen counter while I was in my room changing out of my suit and into jeans and a simple white tshirt.

I picked it up and saw a text from Kate.

Lu, I was going to come by your new place. You home? Up for a visitor?

I smiled.

"Absolutely. I'm in apartment 2."

"See you soon. =)"

I wasn't expecting her to come here ,ever.

She knocked on the door about 10 minutes later and she greeted me with a smile.

"Hey you!" She said as she leaned into hug me.

"Hey yourself." I said hugging her back.

She walked in and I shut the door.

"Wow. Nice place."
She said.

"Thanks."

"You thirsty?" I asked.

"Sure, water is fine."

I tossed her a bottle of water, and she caught it.

She sat at the kitchen bar and I stood against the counter.

I wanted to thank her for so much, especially for last night. But I couldn't find the words to say.

She smiled at me. "Luke, I'm so proud of you. You have no idea how strong you are."

She reached out and touched my hand.

"I'm not strong. I'm the opposite of strong." I said.

She toyed with my fingers and I felt within peace of myself.

"You are. You don't realize it, but you are."

I smiled at her.

"Thank you. Thank you for everything."

10 minutes into our talk her phone dinged and she looked down and then tucked it into her scrub pockets.

"Looks like duty calls. " she said shyly.

"Let me walk you out." I say to her.

We get to my door, but I never turn the knob.

She just stares at me, like she can read my like a book. I notice her chest rise and fall faster, her eyes shine a little bit brighter.

I lick my lips and say, "Can I kiss you, again?"

She nods. She doesn't move. Her eyes still trained on me.

As our lips meet I push myself to her and push her back to the door. Her hands make it around my neck while mine holds their place by the sides of her head.

Our kiss deepens and my tongue slips to her mouth, our mouths twirl and our lips collide with passion.

I hear her whisper my name, as her hand trails down my back.

I am consumed by her. Every thought I have in this moment is her.

I push my hands to the bottom side of her thighs and gently lift her up, wrapping them at my waist.

We kissed hard for what seemed like forever. But it still wasn't enough for me.

"Luke."
"I"
"Got"
"To"
"Go"

She said in between our kiss, and it slows down.

After our lips part, I kiss her forehead and nuzzle my head to her neck.

"Thank you. " I said.

She smiled and walked out the door.

& I turn on my heel and make my way to the bathroom to take a long cold
shower.