No one understands me

Chapter 25 - Yes and No should be simple words!

I stepped back from Jake with a head full of thoughts. I gripped hold of the bed side table to steady myself and just glared at him. "I'm fifteen Jake, that's a silly age right?"

He slowly pushed himself onto his elbows and held out his hand for me. My heart flipped a couple of times and I looked out of the tiny window in the door at Ryan and Carrie. I took a deep breath and walked towards his hand awaiting mine. "Look Jess, I know you've had a crap life with all that's gone on, mine hasn't been great either, but I know from just what I feel when I see you every morning asleep next to me. The fact you snore doesn't bother me either.."

"Hey, I do NOT snore," I clicked my tongue and folded my arms over my chest.

"Relax I was kidding. But seriously, I really want to be with you and I know that there isn't anyone else I would rather be with," he shot me the puppy look and I just turned my head and looked at the ground.

What can I say to that? He's just asked me to MARRY him... I just shrugged my shoulders and gave him the silent treatment. The awkward atmosphere was quickly cut when Ryan walked into the room with Carrie following behind. "Here, thought you might need one," Ryan walked over to me and handed me a hot chocolate. I looked up at him and smiled.

"Thanks," I had to say something to someone before I screamed. "What have you two been doing all this time anyway?" 

"Well Carrie got bored and wanted to go in the little kids area, so I took her down there and she made friends with this other little girl and I just sat there and eyed up all the hot women sitting around."

"Ryan!" I smacked his arm and laughed. "You're such a flirt! This is a hospital not a whore house!"

"Doesn't stop this boy from looking," he winked, and Jake cleared his throat. "Sorry, was I interrupting something?"

"Yes - No" Jake and I said in unison.

"We'll just wait, yeah, bye," Ryan stuttered awkwardly and left.

I continued to stare at Jake and studied harder at his facial expressions. It seemed full of confusion and pain. I didn't want to hurt his feelings, but this is just such a big question, and at being just fifteen, can I want to marry him at this age? We'll be engaged for ages because I'm not even the legal age! I don't want it to be one of those stupid relationships that only last until the end of school and then we go our separate ways. Maybe there's something different about this though. Jake has helped me through all of this shit, and has also taken care of Carrie when I couldn't handle it. Will this last?

"Umm, Jess, you're kinda staring at me," Jake made me crash back down to reality and was chuckling lightly. "You don't have to answer me straight away, but just think about it, we're good together Jess, and everyone can see that,"

"I don't want it to end though, I want a man that I know will be with me forever and not ditch me when a better offer comes along,"

"Sit down baby," he patted the end of the bed and I sat down. "I love you Jess and always will, we've had our ups and downs but anyones relationships that don't have them arn't real. I will always take care of you and-"

"Jake you're going to make me cry," I softly dragged my finger under my eyes to stop tearings from spilling over the edge.

"I have to confess something though,"

My stomach turned and a knot formed. "What?"

"One day I will love someone else, I can't help that but-"

"And you want me to marry YOU... what on earth is wrong with you Jake!"

"You didn't let me finish... that other one I'll love will call you mummy and me daddy," A huge smile filled his face but soon dropped when he saw my face. I couldn't help but let out a massve cry. I pulled my hands to cup my face and cried harder. Why did he just scare me like that? "Jess, I didn't mean to make you cry,"

I didn't let him speak anymore and jumped onto him, wrapping my hands tightly around his neck. "I love you, but you're such an ass," I laughed whilst holding in my sobs. "Don't ever scare me like that,"

"I take it that's a yes," I could feel a smile forming against my neck. "Or am I pushing my luck?"

"It's a yes you spoon," I hugged him tighter and didn't want to let him go.

"Injured person here," he laughed, slowly pulling away. "We can't tell anyone just yet though,"

"Agreed," I said. "When are you allowed out of here?"

"Not too sure yet, hopefully the doctor will be telling me later,"

We sat in silence for about fifteen minutes and for the first time in ages, it wasn't awkward. Now that we're engaged it suddenly feels like a lot of pressure has been released off of my shoulders. I now know we actually mean something and I'm now not scared of losing him. I know that he can still go off and call of the engagement, but after all we've been though I don't think that will be happening anytime soon. I decided to crawl into bed with him and was careful not to pull out any wires or knock anything over. I didn't care if the doctors tell me to get out because at this precise moment I won't move. I want it to be just me and Jake for a while with no people trying to kill him, or no step parents chasing after him.

"Well, this means you'll have to officially move in with me now," he smirked.

"Is that so?" I smiled, and leaned over him to give him a kiss.

"Just think of it Jess... you, me, Carrie and with my family, it will be a fresh start for your both. My mum practically calls you family already anyway, and I know Carrie will want to move in,"

"Well, I'm defiantly not going back to my house, so yours it is,"

"I love you," he said, looking directly into my eyes. It's like one of those really cheesy moments in a awful film.

"I love you too,"

I leaned down to kiss him again and didn't want to pull away for air. From now on, it's a new beginning.