Far Apart || Kaeluc/ Genshin Impact fanfic

11. 𝕰𝖑𝖊𝖛𝖊𝖓

WARNING! Contains self-harm, if you don't feel like reading self-harm in the middle of the night at 3am, um. just scroll to the end for a summary igggg????? (Bcuz i actually dont know if there's an actual thing against reading self-harm so just in case hehee?)

This will mainly be angst chapter and we'll get to know more about Dain, yay!

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"The Knights aren't talking to me," Diluc quietly said to Kaeya one day.

"Now, Diluc, maybe they just need more time to get used to you and—" Kaeya was cut off by Diluc.

"Why aren't they talking to me? You chat with them all the time," Diluc questioned.

"I assume it's because you're the Dawn Winery heir," Kaeya replied, "their just too much of cowards to dare talk to you." Since you're an important person— all high and mighty and heir to— you know— a ginormous fortune and all, Kaeya thought.

Diluc frowned, "don't call them cowards. If they're not talking to me there must be some reason. They talk to each other! They talk to you! It must be my problem that they aren't talking to me— it must be something wrong with me that makes them not interact to me."

"Diluc—" Kaeya cut in.

"It's my fault they don't want to talk to me, it must've been something I did wrong— but I don't know what it is." Diluc rambled on, ignoring Kaeya.

"Diluc, Diluc, you've done nothing wrong," Kaeya took his hand. "Look at me and calm down, you've done nothing wrong. Stop blaming yourself."

Perhaps it was because of his status as the heir of the Dawn Winery, and how Master Crepus always demands the best from him, Diluc always only accepted himself to do the best.

But one boy simply can't be the best at everything— Diluc overworked himself too often, dark circles often present under his eyes when he'd spend the night practising violin. [Of course I'd make Diluc a violinist, why wouldn't I? I play the violin myself and I love it!]

If Diluc had any trouble, Kaeya would be there for him. Always sparing time to comfort and care and soothe Diluc. Always there to give him the love he deserved.

And if Diluc saw the slightest of discomfort or sadness or anything from Kaeya, he wouldn't hesistate to put down whatever was in hand to help. To give Kaeya all the love he hadn't received in Kaeya's childhood.

"I'll stay with you, no matter what!" Diluc had said one day. "Forever and ever!"

Kaeya looked at Diluc, hope in his eyes, "you promise...?"

"Mm-mmm!" Diluc hooked his pinky with Kaeya and pressed their thumbs together. "I pinky promise!"

"Forever and ever!" These were the naive words of an innocent, young child.

Kaeya couldn't help but wonder if he would say the same when he knew the truth.

...

......

Perhaps it was because of all this love he'd received.

No— it must've been because of all this love and care and everything that Diluc and Crepus and Mondstadt had given him—

"..."

Kaeya stood in front of the mirror in his room, his eyepatch carelessly discarded on the floor. He looked at his reflection, and he didn't see the adopted son of Master Crepus, nor did he see the brother of Diluc Ragnvindr.

A weary boy from Khaenri'ah, cast from his homeland, unwanted by his father, living days of lies upon lies. That was what he saw.

And Kaeya... hated himself for who he was. Hated that he was born in a land that even the Gods had abandoned. Hated that even so, light was thrown in his way.