Far Apart || Kaeluc/ Genshin Impact fanfic

19. 𝕹𝖎𝖓𝖊𝖙𝖊𝖊𝖓

"..."

Sitting on the couch, staring at nothing.

"..."

Essentially, Kaeya had done nothing since his talk with Dainsleif—

"..."

"Mmmm."

He lifted his head and turned his hazy gaze towards the clock. It was evening. Six? Six thirty? He hadn't had lunch, and his breakfast hadn't been much. Maybe that was why his stomach was growling.

"If I'm gonna get killed soon, I might as well not eat... or not, I shall walk into death with style... and a full stomach." Kaeya smiled slightly at his own joke. Diluc would've chided me for being un-serious in such a situation... hehe.

Like a peacock... Kaeya was beautiful and elegant and bold, absorbing attention from every person, making heads turn with every step. He was going to leave in a blaze of glory— he had no plans to die in Dragonspine, frozen and forgotten, a place where so little traversed...

"Eh. Or not, maybe I deserve it..." Kaeya sighed. He should stop having these emotional jumps. But then he did have to die the day after tomorro— neh.

Maybe he'd visit some friends, spend his last day with his loved ones... The Favonius Knights, and adorable Klee, and...

Hm.

His brain insistently tugged his thoughts towards a certain red-head. "I kinda miss him. Didn't I just see him this morning, though?" Kaeya mused.

He sighed again. "Fuck..."

He fell sideways on the couch and grabbed a cushion to hug.

"Im sighing like an old man," he mumbled into the soft cushion, then proceeded to sigh again.

- - - - -

Diluc raised an eyebrow when Kaeya walked into the tavern, way earlier than usual. Actually, no. Diluc checked the clock. It was morning. The tavern wasn't even open yet, and Kaeya had decided to so rudely intrude, on this very particular day that Diluc had decided to do the cleaning and setting up the chairs. He usually only arrived to man the bar at night.

"What's this? You're drinking so early in the morning?" Diluc questioned while flipping a chair over and upright. Maybe he'd call Charles to not give Kaeya any drinks in the morning. Was this a regular occurrence? That was simply unhealthy. He frowned.

"Mm, I'm not hear for a drink. I saw Charles outside and not in the tavern, so I thought I'd find you here," Kaeya grinned, lopsided, "guess what? Fate brought me here on this very much rare occurrence."

"Well? Do you have business with me then?" Diluc flipped another chair, and it thudded against the floor.

"Do I have to have business to come see my Diluc?" Kaeya leaned on the counter and put his chin on a hand.

Diluc flushed red, "I-I'm not your—"

Kaeya smiled so widely his muscles hurt. How could he be so cute? For a moment he forgot about dying and he just basked in the comfortable warmth that washed over him. Diluc Diluc Diluc Diluc Diluc...

A nostalgic smile was on his lips as he looked at Diluc. As he tried his best to remember the red of his hair and his eyes and his beautiful burning flames. To remember this blush and that small smile and the retorts he'd throw at him. He carved Diluc into a precious part of his mind, so exquisite and so permanent he was sure he'd never forget him even if he died.

"...Kaeya?" Diluc finished setting all the furniture and walked over to the bar. "Are... you okay?" He asked, noticing Kaeya staring so intensely at himself. And that smile... that small, sad, thoughtful smile... ohh

Diluc didn't like that smile. He remembered seeing that smile when Kaeya was hurting. The kind of warm but broken smile that he only gave to Diluc.

"Mm?" Kaeya jolted a little when Diluc patted his shoulder, "oh, no no no," he said too quickly, "I'm fine. It's all fine." Except the fact that I'm dying tomorrow, that is.

"You promised you'd tell me if something was wrong. You promised you'd tell me eventually," Diluc said softly, "if there's anything wrong... anything burdening you... let me carry this burden with you."

"Please tell me, please let it out so you'll feel better," Diluc begged.

Kaeya turned away to look at the interior of the tavern. A last look at this cozy place of many memories, good and bad. "I..." he started. He wanted to tell Diluc. He wanted that so bad. But then he stopped. He couldn't. So instead he stood and lifted his hand and tilted Diluc's chin up, claiming his sweet red lips for the last time.

"Mn?!" Diluc flushed red again, but clutched tightly onto Kaeya's shirt as Kaeya wrapped an arm around Diluc, a small hug.

"I'll tell you tomorrow," Kaeya said.

"Do you promise?"

"..." Kaeya turned away, his eyes dimming, "yeah... I promise."

I'm sorry, Diluc. He thought as he closed the door and left the tavern.

- - - - -

"Kaeya." Jean.

"Kaeya~" Lisa.

"Captain Kaeya!" Amber.

"Mister Kaeya!" Klee.

"Kaeya..." Albedo.

"Kaeya?" Rosaria.

All these people he loved. All these people he'd met and treasured.

Hey, it had all meant to come to an end, hadn't it? He wasn't really expecting to settle down in Mond forever, had he?

He was naïve to have thought that he could leave his past behind and live here forever. This beautiful place so full of happiness and love, joy and laughter and carefree and no war, no conflicts, no constant fear...

Hey, it had all been meant to leave him at some point, right?

So when did he forget himself? When did he start loosing up and relaxing and forgetting the fear and terror? When did he start joining this land in its joy?

Why did he start dreaming about a better future? Hoping? For nothing?

Kaeya laughed to himself as he closed the door to his apartment. All these people, all these memories, the walks and the talks, the feeling of warm breeze against his hair...

I'll remember all of this, and hey, I'll die happily knowing I'd lived a better life than all the people of my homeland.

Im fine, right? It's ok, right? I've been strong and it's over now and it's perfectly alright...

"..."

Water slid down his cheek, like rain. His sight blurred.

"So why am I crying like a fucking weakling?"

- - - - -

Angst 🤌🏻🤌🏻🤌🏻🤌🏻✨💕🥺

— your lovely author Scarlet