Falling Stars [h.s]

Chapter 13

Aurora

Coming home from work the next day I was drained. It was already seven o'clock. Harry was going to be here in less than an hour. I was yet to be ready for our outing. I searched through my closet of dresses, trying to find something decent to wear. It has been a long while since I wore a dress occasionally. I've gotten so used to dressing up in my work suits that it has become a natural attire for me to wear everyday. I flipped through the dresses until a familiar one came into my view. A little black dress that brought back too many unwanted memories. I flipped to the next dress, covering the little black dress with another so I didn't have to see it anymore. I couldn't possibly pull off that dress anymore.

The next dress I came across was a blue, short sleeve, floral embroiled body-con dress. I remember buying the dress for my 25th birthday party that I never attended. I removed the dress from the hanger, changing into it. I walked over to my mirror to look at my reflection. The dress went a little past my knees and clung onto my body. I took my hair up into a ponytail, twirling it around until I created a bun.

The doorbell sounded throughout the house. It was already seven thirty five. I left the bedroom. Walking downstairs to answer the door. Harry stood opposite of me. He wore a simple black suit with a pink button up underneath.

Harry's eyes scanned my body before meeting my eyes. "Am I early? I can wait until you get ready."

I shifted around in my sweat pants and hoodie I recently changed into. "I can't go."

A look of disappointment washed over his face, but it was gone in seconds, "Why not?"

"Zayn and Odyssey are out for the night, I can't leave the kids. Maybe another night."

His eyes lost contact with mine, his gaze shifting to the floor instead. He shoved his hands in the pockets of his suit pants and nodded slightly, "Oh."

"Yeah. I'm sorry."

"Well what if I get my babysitter to come by with Harper and Oliver?" The tone of his voice sounded hopeful yet desperate.

"That doesn't seem like a good idea. I'm sorry Harry, we'll try again another night. I have to go." Harry still stood in the same spot as I closed the door on him. I locked the door then leaned my back against it. I felt bad, but it was the right thing to do. Getting involved with Harry right now would only cause chaos. I didn't need chaos right now. I needed to continue with the peace I have recently gotten used to.

Zayn walked past me, but soon stopped and turned back around, looking at me with confusion, "I thought you were going out tonight? Is Harry not coming?"

I sat down on the floor and leaned back against the door, "I decided not to go."

"Why's that?" I shrugged my shoulders in response to his question. Zayn sat down next to me. He reseted his head on his knees and turned to look at me. "You know Aurora, It's okay to feel."

I let out a puff of air, averting my attention to the ground infront of me, "I'm afraid."

"What are you afraid of?"

"I don't know." The truth is, I was afraid of loving too much and too hard, too fast. It didn't turn out so well when it happened the first time around. Harry's actions never matched his words. He only ever told me what I wanted to hear, but what I wanted to hear isn't what he wanted to say. He didn't express himself truthfully to me and I was afraid of going down that rode again. I told myself I've moved on. I thought I did, but honestly I haven't. It's hard to stop loving him. As much as I didn't want to admit it there was no denying, I feel deeply in love with Harry that it was impossible to forget about everything we've been through together. At the same time looking back at all the troubles I went through during my daughter's pregnancy it was hard to forgive him as well. The pain I went through was like no other. Not only was it mental, but physical as well. Especially during birth. He wasn't there when I needed him most.

"After living with you for these past years, I like to think I got to know you better than I ever have and there's something special about you Aurora. No matter how much pain you've been through, no matter how badly someone has mistreated you, and no matter what you're going through in a moment you never fail to have a big heart. You have a heart of gold and no matter what you always put other's first. I really love that about you Aurora. Odyssey would disagree with me and say you need to put yourself first, although that may be true, caring for others isn't a crime. It's who you are."

Zayn paused for a quick second. I sat quietly waiting for him to continue, my eyes welled up as I tried to hold back my tears. "I think I know what you're afraid of. It's not loving again you're afraid of, but pain. There isn't a person in this world who isn't afraid of such a thing. Old pain is the worst, but I know you can get through it. Confidence will help you go far and you definitely have that. You've got what it takes. I've ;; c with Harry for years and I can truthfully tell you, he is not a bad person Aurora. He only ever has the right intentions. I know he doesn't deserve this, but you should give him another chance. Only if that's what you want of course."

I rested my head on the door, looking up at the ceiling to blink away the tears. "I love him so much Zayn."

Zayn scooted closer to me. He wrapped his arms around my body and held me tightly. I buried my face in his chest as my sobs got louder. "I know."