Falling Stars [h.s]

Chapter 75

Aurora

A month had passed since everything happened. It was now June. Summer was officially here and school was out. Odysseus and I were growing stronger in our relationship with each passing day. Odyssey was barley able to move as she tried to carry the stomach of three, six month old fetuses. She was huge to say the least. Harry and I haven't spoken in a while. The last time I saw him was the day at the courthouse. He never came by to see Layla after that day. I wondered what he was up to, but my curiosity remained. I didn't act on it. He will come by eventually when he is ready.

I was getting ready for my trip to Disney World with Layla and Odysseus. Zayn, Odyssey and their kids were tagging along on the trip as well. I tried to talk Odyssey out from flying on an airplane but she refused to listen to me. Her doctor cleared her for travel, but I wanted to take extra precautions especially since she is pregnant with not one but three babies. Even so, I couldn't talk her out of it. She insisted since it was only a four hour flight. Our plane was set to board tomorrow night.

I was busy doing the remainder of packing when the doorbell sounded through out the house. I left the bedroom going to answer the door. Layla was busy watching television with Aiden and Saturn. I turned the door opened, surprised to see Harry on the other end.

"Hey stranger." I greeted him. He smiled a weak smile, greeting me as well.

"You can come inside, Layla is in the living room watching TV I'm sure she'll be thrilled to see you."

"No, I'm not staying long."

"Oh. Why is that?"

He looked down at his hand, I followed his gaze, my eyes falling on an envelope he held tightly in his hands, He looked up at me with tears in his eyes.

I shook my head repeatedly, already having a feeling as to what is coming next, "Harry please don't do this."

"I just wanted to drop this off. It's for Alaska. Please explain it to her and tell her I'm sorry that I have to leave."

"Tell her yourself. Come inside, give her the letter and tell her how you are leaving her again. I won't do it."

"Aurora please. This is already hard enough as it is. Please just take the letter."

"Why are you doing this Harry?"

"I have to. I can't stay here. Priscilla wants to move so that is what we are doing. I'm leaving for Boston tomorrow. I'm going to take over Mrs. Edna's bookstore. Priscilla and I are working this out. She wants a fresh start and this is the only way. I'm going to reside in Boston with her and Harper and Oliver."

"I'm only going to tell you this once Harry, if you leave now don't bother coming back."

He hung his head low and held out his hand towards me, "Please make sure she gets this."

I took the envelope from him without another word. He glanced at me once more before turning around and getting into his car and driving away. I titled my head back to stop the tears. I can't cry. I won't. I closed the door then went into the kitchen. I sat down on a stool then proceeded to ripe open the envelope that was addressed to Layla.

Dear Layla Alaska Styles,

I hope this letter finds you well. Maybe not now, but in a few years when you are old enough to understand it your mother will give you the chance to read it on your own.

First off I want to say I'm sorry for leaving. It is not you that I left. I had to leave in order to keep a promise I made a long time ago. I want you to know just how much I love you. I love you with all my heart. You are my first born, I will always be there for you whenever you need me. So please don't ever hesitate to call me when you are in need of me. I want to take the time out to say thank you and I'm sorry.

Thank you for making me a father. Thank you for allowing me to love you even after everything I put you through. I'm sorry I wasn't there for you from the start. I'm sorry I'm not here now. I know I'm not perfect. I'm sorry for leaving when you needed me most. I failed to keep my promises and commitments I made to you and your mother. Most of all I failed to be the dad you most deserve. Please forgive me for the pain that I have caused you. Forgive me for the ways I have hurt you. Forgive me for not being able to talk to you and spend all the time in the world with you. Forgive me for all the negative thoughts I have caused you to think of me and of yourself.

I miss you dearly already. I want you to know I am always thinking about you. I was distracted by so many other things in life that I failed to pay enough attention to you. I am sorry for taking so long on making the decision of staying or going. It was unfair of me to come a little closer and be in your life only to go away again. It was not fair of me to do that to you and I wish that I hadn't. I regret that I pretended for so long that I was maybe going to stay, that I might change. I wasn't going to change. Your mother knew that. She pleaded with me to stay, but I just couldn't bring myself to.

I made my decision to leave. I followed my heart and made my choice that I wanted to pursue the life that I live today. Someday maybe it will feel right for me to say more to you about that. But it doesn't justify breaking your heart as a small child. Nothing will ever justify that. I will carry that mark for the rest of my life, as I'm sure you will too.

I knew that you were cared for when I left. I knew that your mother, your aunt, and your uncles would all be there for you. I told myself that you didn't need me, that you would be alright without me. I know that you have a good life, that you are loved, that you are taken care of. I even told myself that you were better off without me. I had no right to say that. I had no right to decide that for you, but I did it anyway.

I hope one day in the near future we can meet again on different terms. I love you munchkin.

Always and Forever, - H.Styles

I folded the now tear filled letter back to the way it was and placed it in the envelope. I left the kitchen and went to my bedroom to store it in a safe place. I couldn't bring myself to Layla. I can't tell her that her dad left not long after meeting him. This is what I've been afraid of all along. If I tell her now it'll only break her. She is only still a child. I just can't put her through pain anymore.

When she is old enough to understand the situation more I will give her the letter.

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