Falling Stars [h.s]

Chapter 69

Aurora

A whole month had passed since Harry and I ended our relationship. He hasn't been around much. He promised we could set our feelings aside to co parent, but It's been almost two weeks since he last came to see Layla. Layla of course hasn't questioned it much. I was starting to wonder though if he really wanted to be around for her anymore.

Odysseus and I have gotten closer than before. We were making things work. He asked me to be his girlfriend not too long ago and I took Zayn's advice and said yes. Maybe it was wrong of me to get into it with Odysseus so soon after breaking up with Harry or maybe it was meant to be Odysseus all along.

It was the weekend but I was at the office filing out paper work for a current case I was working on. I was half way through when a knock came on my office door. I looked up at the door in confusion. I wasn't expecting anybody. I called out for the person to enter, "Come in."

"Hey." The sound of Harry's voice caused me to stop everything I was doing. I stood up from my seat, leaving from behind the desk.

"Harry, what are you doing here?"

"This past month I've had a lot of time to think. It's been so hard being away from you but I think it was what I needed to clear my mind and really get my thoughts in order. To get my feelings right."

"Harry." I tried to stop him from saying what I knew he was trying to say. I didn't want to hear it. It was too late. I've moved on. I bottled up all my feelings for Harry and tucked them away. I can't go back and unseal them now. I just can't. I didn't understand why he was doing this. He knows what it will mean to me if he does this.

He took a step closer to me and intertwined his fingers in mine.

"I love you Aurora."

After waiting for years to hear Harry say those three little words that had such a big meaning, I didn't make me feel as I had expected. It wasn't what I was hoping for. My heart didn't leap for joy, the fireworks didn't go off, I wasn't weak in the knees, my stomach wasn't doing turns. All the mere cliche emotions I was expecting never rushed through me. What did this mean? The first time Elijah told me he loved me I felt all those things. I even almost threw up over excitement. And almost instantly after he told me he loved me, I did the same, because I truly did. Standing here in front of Harry in this moment, I couldn't bring myself to get the words out of my mouth. As much as I wanted to, I couldn't. It wasn't because I was speechless, but because I no longer felt that way about him. As much as I hated to admit it, I was no longer in love with Harry Styles. People tend to say it's hard to fall out of love, but after waiting years for someone to love you back it tends to become easier to not love them anymore and move on. I have moved on. I have moved onto bigger and better things. Better people who are good for me. Odysseus is good for me. He knows how to treat me. He knows the right things to say. He's always there. He never once makes me second guess our relationship. I love him. He is the person I want to spend the rest of my life with. He may not be my once upon a dream or my fairytale ending, but indeed he is my happily ever after.

I always believed it when people said the hardest thing in life is when the person who you created some of the most amazing memories with eventually become a memory, but I came to the realization that that isn't true. I've learned that the hardest thing is loving someone who isn't around anymore. And trying to love someone who isn't around anymore is painful, it is painful to the point it makes you second guess your whole life. But throughout the years I've also learned that the best way to love someone who doesn't love you back is to not love them at all.

I carefully removed my hand from Harry's and took a step back from him. He looked at me with painful teary eyes,

"You know, this past month I learned something very valuable. I learned that the only way to love someone who doesn't love you back is to not love them either. The most painful thing isn't losing the person you value the most, it's losing yourself in the process of valuing that person too much and forgetting just how valuable you are yourself. I thought I was over you. I thought I moved on. For years I told myself I was over you and that I have moved on, only to come to realize that I never really left. I want to move on, but it seems impossible because whenever I try you show up. The reason I can't keep a relationship is because of you. I am constantly mourning what we had or what I thought we had that it's made it impossible for me to love someone else. I was there for you Harry. I was there for you when all we had was each other. I was there for you when all you had was me. I was constantly there for you. When everyone else came and went, I stayed by your side. I loved you like no one has ever loved you before. So tell me how did we end up here?"

"Aurora please say you love me back. Please just say it. You don't understand how hard it has been for me to finally come to terms with my feelings for you. I love you Aurora. I've always been deeply in love with you I just didn't know how to express that. I didn't know how to give you the love you deserve and not because of anything you did but because I found it hard to show my feelings."

"Once upon a time we had something great. Maybe one day we can be friends, but for now this is goodbye. I have a new life waiting for me. A new journey that I will surely find my way through. Odysseus is my new journey. My new life. He gets me. He understands me, everyday he teaches me more than I ever knew, he values me, when things get rough he talks to me and doesn't shut me out. He cares for me, he respects me, he values me, he needs me just as much as I need him, but most importantly, he loves me. More than you ever have."

"Aurora please." I watched as the tears streamed down his face as he pleaded with me. He constantly pleaded for me to say I love him. He pleaded for me to let him stay. He pleaded for me give him another chance.

But I had no more chances to give.

"Goodbye Harry."

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