Remember me

Chapter 18

Mia

The next day I spend in bed. I try to watch tv, I try to read, I even give myself a facial, but I can't keep my mind from replaying yesterday. It was a whirlwind of feelings going back to that place and I feel motion sickness from the emotional ride. I'm thankful that the old trailer is gone now, leaving just an empty lot in its place. I don't know what happened to it, but I hope it burned to the ground with everything in it.

Part of me is still so angry over the terrible things that happened there, yet the other part is also glad because it brought me Nick. If that place didn't exist in my history then Nick wouldn't have either, and that's a trade I would never make.

Marilee eventually comes to check on me, wondering why I haven't came out of my room all day so I tell her I'm sick. I call Cole and send him several text messages but he never responds. I know he's upset I couldn't make it to his game. I want to support him, but honestly it just feels like such a menial thing compared to my other emotions right now. Maybe I'm just selfish.

Marilee took me to therapy after that night 7 years ago. She didn't take me by choice but because the social services woman at the hospital told her she had to. The therapist had told me I had to let myself feel things, and not pretend they didn't happen. Well I think she would be pretty proud these days because all I can do is feel right now. I curl myself into a ball on my bedroom floor and wrap my blanket around me, tears falling down my cheeks. Eventually I fall asleep.

,,

The next morning Marilee let's me
take her car to school since she thinks I'm not feeling well. My eyes are puffy and red and she makes several comments about using more concealer that I ignore.

When I arrive at school Kimmy sidles up beside me in the hallway, knocking her shoulder with mine. She's wearing a school mascot shirt and her blonde a hair is curled to perfection. The sight of her makes me run my hand over my own braid self consciously.

"Too bad you didn't make it to Cole's game this weekend, Mia," she says. "Dont worry though I made sure he felt very supported." I take a step back from her, regaining some of my personal space. "Cole knows I was supporting him from home. I would of been there if I could have. Plus he told me all about it, of course" I say. Ok so that's a stretch since I haven't actually heard from Cole, but Kimmy is so obviously trying to make me jealous.

"Oh so he must have told you all about the hotel? All the players got their own rooms. It was totally great for privacy." She smirks and I narrow my eyes at her, I am not in the mood for this today. "What are you implying Kim?"

"Oh nothing at all! Just saying it was nice of the coaches is all." She smiles with a false sweetness, "I'm sure you wish you could of been the one there to comfort Cole."

I blink. "Comfort him?"

"Well of course. You know all about his injury right? Poor Cole was so stressed, it just broke my heart to see." Her mouth turns down in an artificial pout. "But I made sure to do everything in my power to make sure he got some relief" she adds with a wink.

Relief? Did she just wink at me? I am not in the mood to tolerate this right now. I suck in breath and begin to shout "Kimmy you desperate bi-" but I'm cut off by a drink being spilled onto Kimmy's shirt.

"Oops" says Marley cooly. "The floor is so slick, I must of slipped." She looks Kimmy up and down and tisks, "Oh honey you better go clean yourself up."

Kimmy pulls her sticky shirt away from herself.  "What the hell, Marley!" she seethes. Kimmy turns on her heel and rushes down the hall towards the nearest bathroom.

I turn towards Marley, my mouth open in shock. "Oh don't look so surprised Mia, she obviously deserves it. Also I'm pretty sure you were about to call her a bitch in front of everyone."

I shake my head, "You're wild Mars. But thank you, for backing me up." Marley puts her arm around my shoulders, guiding me towards class "I don't know what happened this weekend Mia, but I think you and Cole need to have a talk. Rumors are flying." I sigh, exhausted. "I think you're right."

..

I sit in the library during lunch because I don't feel like I have the emotional capacity to face anyone else today. I almost lost it with kimmy this morning and I haven't even spoken with Cole yet.

I sit down at one of the tables in the back of the room and pull out my chemistry book to study. I'm reading the same line for the tenth time when I feel someone sit beside me. I glance up to see Nick, resting casually in his seat with his chin in his hand looking at me. He's wearing a plain white t-shirt and I can't help but notice how it pulls tight across his muscular chest.

"How are you?" he asks, his eyes raking over me, probably taking in my disheveled state. "Fine" I reply, my voice raspy from disuse. I clear my throat and add "Im good." Nick leans over and touches my chin with his hand, lightly turning my face in his direction. "No your not" he replies. He leans back in his chair and rubs his hand over his eyes. "I'm sorry" he says, "this is my fault. I shouldn't of brought you there. I know it's a place of nightmares. I just wanted you to see the treehouse.. See how it survived." He pauses, "just like we did."

I glance over at him, feeling a sudden sense of resolve at his words. "No, you're right." For some reason what he said is exactly what I needed to hear. "We did survive, didn't we?" Nick reaches over and tucks a piece of hair behind my ear, "Yeah Mia, we did." He says softly, "You always knew we would."

"Mia?" I hear my name from across the room. Nick stands abruptly, "I'll see you later" he says, walking away. I want to reach out and grasp his hand, beg him not leave. Instead I turn my head to the front of the library where I see Cole heading towards me.

Here we go.

Cole comes to a stop in front of me. "Mia? I've been looking everywhere for you" he says. The first thing I notice is that his shoulder is in a sling. I shoot up from my chair "Cole, your arm! What happened?" Even I know that's his pitching arm, and a sling is obviously bad news. His jaw tenses and he takes a step away from me. "Dont pretend you care, Mia."

My eyes widen "Of course I care, Cole! You haven't answered my calls or texts. Kimmy mentioned an injury this morning but I thought she was just being vindictive. I wanted-"

"Kimmy?" Cole interrupts "What did Kimmy tell you?" He runs his hand through his hair, adverting his eyes. I think back on Kimmy's less than subtle hints this morning and ask "Is there something you want to tell me?" Cole locks eyes with me, his anger returning "Is there something you want to tell me, Mia?"

"Wh-what?" I stammer, caught off guard. "I saw that new guy sitting in here with you. That's the second time I've seen you with him. You've been watching him in the halls and in the cafeteria, Mia. I'm not blind."

"It's not like that" I say softly, looking at my toes. I feel guilty. I haven't done anything to betray Cole, but I feel like my heart maybe has. "Then what's it like, Mia!" Cole says, his voice rising. I cringe at the way he's saying my name, like it's a curse word. "He was a childhood friend. Someone I use to know. I was curious about what happened to him."

Now my temper is starting to ignite, irritated at Coles tone and the way he's looking at me with disgust. "What about you Cole? Don't think I didn't notice the way you brushed over my question about Kimmy. She seemed to have a lot to say about you and her this weekend."

He rubs his hand over his eyes. "Damnit Mia, that's not the point. She was there and you weren't this weekend. Why couldn't you have just came. Everything would of been different."

"Different how?" I ask.

"I couldn't get my mind off you! I was so fixated on you showing up that I wasn't minding my pitching arm. I sprained my shoulder. I didn't even get to play the last game." He runs his hand through his hair looking distressed "it was an important game. Scouts were there. The news was there. My family. I didn't even get to play."

The bell rings, signaling the end of lunch. Cole looks at me with a hopeless expression. "We'll talk later, okay?" He walks off without waiting for a reply.

As I'm packing my books back in my bag feeling guilty, I realize he still never told me what exactly happened with Kimmy.