[80.] Let me./Bite you.

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It took some time and some effort on the part of Hanguang-Jun until finally Wei Wuxian let him feed him. Just like a frightened animal, he would only hide his face in Lan Zhan's robes, repeating the same words, refusing to let go of him, trembling badly. The new surroundings didn't help, and neither did the tale of Miao Lu's nightmare.

They sat together, holding each other tight, in silence, and when Bai Li came to take the dishes away, Lan Wangji said sternly:

- Leave the food. Bring us some wine.

She bowed, amazed  – it was already too late in the evening, and also – wine was something of a taboo in the House after the horrible accident the Masters had several years ago. She shuddered, but soon came back with a small keg of wine and two cups. Hanguang-Jun frowned and returned one of the cups to her, telling her they were not be disturbed any more tonight. 

She left, confused and worried.

Lan Wangji poured the wine slowly and brought the cup to his lover, murmuring gently:

- Wei Ying, please. Drink, please? You need your strength, love.

He waited patiently, and after a while Wei Ying took the cup and drank it. He usually would only have wine when they visited the other Clans, and didn't even know there was any wine kept at Cloud Recesses any more, it was so rare for them to have any – Lan Wangji would not even taste it for the life of him. He missed it – drinking wine always brought him good mood.

After the first cup, Hanguang-Jun felt him relax a bit and poured another. It took half a keg before Wei Wuxian sat up and looked at him, flushed.

- Are you feeling better, my love?   – he asked, smiling.

- Lan Zhan... You did this for me...? – Wei Ying asked foolishly.

- Mmm.

Wei Ying knew that wine meant very bad memories for his husband. He shook his head – he still, somehow, continued to hurt him.

- You sacrifice too much for me. I hate it, Hanguang-Jun. – he mumbled.

Lan Zhan poured another cup, but before handing it over, he delicately took some food with his chopsticks and brought it to Wei Wuxian's lips.

- Please. For me. Please. – he murmured.

Tears came up in Wei Ying's eyes again, but he closed them and opened his mouth. Once the food was chewed and swallowed, Lan Wangji leaned in and tenderly kissed his lips.

- I love this mouth more than anything in the world. – he whispered, breathlessly.

Eyes still closed, Wei Ying smiled faintly.

Lan Wangji repeated the procedure – bringing more food to him, slowly, every time asking him to open his mouth, feeding him, coaxing him like a small child. In the end, Wei Ying was brave enough to open his eyes, still smiling, and to take the cup of wine himself, drinking it with pleasure. He, however, still let his husband take care of his food. Hanguang-Jun was smiling more and more, happy to see his appetite return.

- Is it better, my love? Are you feeling better? – he asked carefully.

- Yes. – he nodded. – The wine helps me relax... but you shouldn't have...  -  he sighed.

- Mmmm.

- Lan Zhan, promise me that you will go to the Cold Spring first thing tomorrow morning? Promise. – he pouted.

- I promise, my heart. – his lover smiled.

- And no sex tonight. Promise me! – Wei Ying pouted more, crossing his arms in front of his chest, flushed even more than before.

- Wei Ying... Uhh... 

- Promise! Promise me!

- I... I... Hmmmmm.

- Lan Zhan!  –  he blushed more.  –  Why are you looking at me like that!? Did you have wine too? – Wei Ying sulked, seeing how red in the face his husband was.

- Wei Ying!!! 

There was such reproach in Lan Wangji's voice that Wei Ying, feeling sorry, dared lean in and kiss him. The kiss was very slow and careful as not to make their lips bleed again, but Lan Zhan couldn't stop himself from drawing his loved one in, pressing him close to his body once again, passionately, urgently, whispering between taking in breaths:

- Don't make me promise this... Please... Ever...  You don't know... You don't know, Wei Ying... You don't know, husband, how hard it is... just how hard it is for me not to kiss you, not to touch you, not to drink you... every waking moment of my life... I crave for you... I need you like the air, like the sun, and the water... Wei Ying... My love...

- Husband...  -  Wei Ying exclaimed breathlessly.

- Never make me promise not to love you... Never, please...  -  he almost whimpered.

- Dearest... Forgive me... Forgive me, Lan Zhan... -  he cried, kissing his face more, kissing his jaw and neck and collarbone gently.

Their hands and lips caressed and fondled carefully, and even through the clothes it felt wonderful. It was one of those rare moments in which they shared their affection and tenderness with each other, losing themselves into each other, and it wasn't sexual – it was just warm.

Finally, they let go of each other, but Wei Ying stayed in the best embrace – this room was cooler than theirs. He was sipping on the wine now, smiling and winking at a very red in the face Lan Zhan, watching him eat.

- So... - he looked around finally.  –  This is Zewu-Jun's room. Typical. But, you know, my heart, I am not sure I am comfortable with having sex in his room anyway! – he grinned at a severely blushing Lan Wangji.

- Wei Ying...  -  he mumbled.

- Please, eat. And tell me what all that blood was all about. – Wei Ying frowned. – I have no clear memory of how it all started, I only remember that it was damn hot.

Lan Wangji shook his head, thoughtfully.

- You need the elements that feed your resentful energy. Alas, I cannot share my spiritual energy with you. You know this. – he explained.

- Yes... It would probably kill me. – he mumbled.

They had tried in the past, but it went terribly wrong, and after that Wei Ying was bed-ridden for almost a month. The shared core did not compensate the fact that their magic was too different – one could even say that they perused opposite types of magic.

- I have noticed how you crave for meat... And today, as some of it was almost raw – it triggered the need for iron too. Hence the blood.  –  Lan Wangji sipped on some tea, closing his eyes, as he knew what was to follow.

- So... Sooo... So, you LET ME BITE YOU?!?  LAN ZHAN!!! – Wei Ying was fuming. – Did you... Are you really so stupid! Why would you do it?!?  IDIOT!!!  –  he yelled, totally ignoring the fact that it was very late at night.

- Mmm, darling. – Lan Wangji tilted his head, gazing in his eyes calmly now. – You need it. Your body needs it. And... the baby needs it.

- Lan Zhan!  –  the yells were getting shriller.

- How can I refuse something that our son needs, sweetheart? – he said sweetly.

- So you let me hurt you... you let me... you... you...  -  Wei Ying was gasping, feeling that he'd run out of air in his lungs.

Lan Wangji reached out and caressed his face, smiling:

- I would do anything for you. I would die for you, Wei Ying. Without hesitation. Whatever I can give, whatever brings you pleasure and happiness – I will try to provide. How can I deny you something you need, husband? – he said gently.

- I hate you...  -  Wei Ying grunted, unsure if he was more upset, or more annoyed.

- My love...  -  Lan Wangji whispered. – You have never been hotter and more beautiful for me... And it amazes me, after so many years together, Wei Ying... You amaze me every day... My dearest... my sweetest...

Wei Ying lifted his eyes and looked at him with such pain and despair that he yearned to take him, undress him, love him, console him in the best possible way. But he only reached out his hand and stroked his hair, his neck, his clothes.

- Does this mean... that you... forgive me, Hanguang-Jun? – he asked sadly.

- There is nothing to forgive, my love. I asked you to do it. Moreover, all the bruises will be gone by tomorrow night. – Lan Zhan smiled. – Will you make love to me tomorrow night, Wei Qianbei?  –  he breathed out the question, lips parted, his face burning, ashamed, nervous.


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