It doesn't end here !

Chapter XXII

It was a warm evening. We all sat next to each other and talked. Murphy had taught us some games from the Ark that Bellamy and he used to play. We did not need much for this. Stones and a stick were enough. Emori drew some circles on the ground which built the field we played on. It was always a good way to spent time together. 

 Just as I was about to move my tile one field further, I heard a whistle. I immediately froze in my movement, turned around and felt wind on my back. The magical blue portal. It was back. Eagerly I was waiting to see Allie show up to tell us when the war starts, but she didn't come. The blue circle began to blink. I reacted right away and pulled my friends as far away as I could. The portal was about to explode and I had to protect them, that was my last thought before the blue light pulled me in and I disappeared.

Perspective Tara kom Trikru:

Days passes by and nothing changed. I painted, made music, ate something, slept, watched the butterflies and did it all over again. From time to time I even started comparing the way the little animals flew around, with dancing, what I had learned from Niylah. The butterflies made the room special. I really hoped that I could keep the memories of them forever. From time to time, I realized how I had changed. I spend my days more and more on the ground, meditating the way, Lexa and Gaia taught me too and it made me calm and relaxed. I was used to the situation. The butterflies kept me in company and the longer I stayed on the ground, the more often they approached me. From one point on, I was so calm that even one of the butterflies sat on my arm. I felt special, a bit like a part of their family.                                                                                                      Later that day I got tired and went to bed. When I woke up again, I sat down on the bedside and closed my eyes. For the first time in my life, I really felt ready for something. Just as I was about to return to my drawings on the floor, one of the symbols on the wall started blinking. I quickly ran to the wall and put my left hand on the sign. Now my tattoo started to glow. "Ai laik ogud17" When I finished my sentence, a blue circle appeared in the middle of the room. Before I could think about it any further, I saw Clarke walking through the portal. 

I couldn't believe my eyes. Was this the reality? I wasn't so sure but I ran to my sister and fell into her arms. She held me tight and calmed me down. I had missed her so much. ''Tara, Shhhh everything is alright. I am here and I am not leaving you again. You are my sister and my responsibility and I will protect you with my life if I have to.''

17. Ai laik ogud – I am ready

I couldn't say anything. I just wanted to be near Clarke. That was all what mattered in this moment. Then she bent down and her sight fell on my left wrist. She seemed as shocked as I was when I had noticed it the first time. My sister stepped away to take a look around in my room. ''Tara, you are really important for the last war, believe me. All those symbols and the details are connected to you. You are the key to the last war. I am sure and you are ready. We landed in Penance some time ago and had to stay there. The computer did not give us access to the next world without you.'' I had to interrupt her, even thought, I hated to interrupt others but this time it was necessary. I looked straight into my sisters eyes and had to tell her what Becca told me the other day. Clarke needed to know that the computer wanted to protect me and that I could leave my Mindspace as soon as I was ready.

My sister and I finally were able to put the pieces together and all started to make so much sense. I was ready for this. I wasn't childish or vulnerable anymore, no I have gained strength, self-confidence and peace of mind. Before I could tell Clarke about it, the blue light appeared and swallowed us both.

I couldn't see anything around me, only blue. I really hoped that I would land on Penance this time even though I knew the last war was imminent. I didn't like the thought but I knew it was my destiny. I'll bear it so the others don't have to. The longer the light kept us trapped, the more I thought about myself and my past. Ever since I was sent down to Earth with the others, I've been judging myself. Over the years, I had learned that it's easier to judge yourself when you've been judged by others. 

 When we landed on Earth, I was eleven, I had no one but Clarke. Everyone else who was my age had no interest in talking to me. For them, I had always been the doctor's daughter. All my life, I had enjoyed privileges. I was only allowed to live because my mother had worked hard for them over many years in her job. The others knew that and didn't like me for it. They used to call my sister princess. Still she had gotten the role of the leader at some point and that was a good thing. In time, I found someone who really liked to talk to me. Octavia. Oddly enough, she should be the person to hate me the most, but she never did. 

She was always eager to hear what I could tell her about my life. At that time she was sixteen and had spent her life under the floor. From time to time she became more and more of a true friend. I really appreciated her. Bellamy hated me and Clarke. Actually, much more our mother for her privileges. When his sister was found, their mother was executed because she did not have the privilege of having a second child. His sister understood him but didn't want to judge me for my privileges and that means everything to me to this day.

It wasn't until Clarke fell into a hole in the ground and he was able to save her in the last second, that he began to make friendship with my sister. Sometime just before we discovered Mount Weather, he started to take care of me as if I was his sister. When Praimfaya came and Clarke stayed on Earth with Lexa, he realized I had lost everything. At that time, we had no idea if my sister and her girlfriend were still alive or if someone would survive in the bunker.

I was pretty young at twelve and definitely not ready so Bellamy eventually took over the role of my father. I'm very grateful to him for that because I wouldn't be me without him. Life had changed constantly and in Bardo, we almost lost him two times but he came back to his real family. The people who went through good and bad together. The older I got, the more from the Ark accepted me. Especially people like Miller and Murphy. 

Although I mostly stayed in the background and I liked that. Nevertheless I had good ideas from time to time. When Russell tried to kidnap me secretly in Sanctum, Niylah and Miller had protected me with their lives. They both felt responsible for me and I meant something to them. Just like they meant to me.