Black Phillip vs. Monster Pig

Monster Pig Remembers He's Supposed to be Fighting

Monster Pig got so caught up with his affair with Mummy Pig and multiple cases of venereal diseases he forgot why he was even in America. Monster Pig had never seen a Walmart in real life and he knew America was stocked up on Walmarts. Monster Pig found the closest one and decided found another rando to say the Long Pig short pig rhyme and drive him to a fun little stroll in Wally World.

Monster Pig and the rando waltzed into Walmart and Monster Pig immediately went to the gun section. Monster Pig was confused as to why you can buy guns in America but he wasn't about to complain. He started stacking up on military grade weapons alongside a family shopping for school supplies and a newly married couple using their gift cards from their wedding. Monster Pig then went around and found some candles an aisle over and some children's bikes.

The rando that brought Monster Pig seemed a little unsettled with the mass purchase of weapons but kept quiet as he was still under Monster Pig's spell. Monster Pig was walking around the store with the weapons strapped across his back when he ran into someone coming off of their shift as a clown at a local children's birthday party. Monster Pig felt an incredible urge to eat the clown and started barreling towards him at the quickest speed a monstrously large pig can go.

As he was racing towards the clown, screams could be heard amongst the many shoppers. The clown started running for his life and the rando that brought Monster Pig to Walmart decided it was his time to exit the scene and left to "pick up Chinese food he forgot about." Monster Pig went to chase the clown out the Walmart and got stuck in the automatic doors. As the doors kept Monster Pig in place, small children came up to poke him and shit and eventually Black Phillip got wind of the massive pig stuck at Walmart through a TikTok that was going viral. Black Phillip decided to go slop him up and put this thing to an end.

Black Phillip approached the doors and used his black magic to get Monster Pig out. Monster Pig was confused and then it dawned on him, he was supposed to be fighting the goat. Unfortunately, Monster Pig's weapons were left in the store and he definitely wasn't getting them back, so he was stuck returning to the basics, fighting with his bare fists (hooves).