𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐒𝐈𝐂𝐊 ── 𝒕𝒓𝒖𝒆 𝒃𝒆𝒂𝒖𝒕𝒚. ✔︎

𝟬𝟯𝟴. new beginnings, old feelings.

— ❝ ( chapter thirty-eight, new beginnings, old feelings. ) ᵕ̈ ೫˚∗

        SUMMER.

Jang Moonyoung was not returning to Saebom Highschool for her senior year. In fact, these will be her final days in Korea, for now. Seoul wasn't for her. She found the life there wasn't the greatness she was destined for. That summer, she had packed her bags once again and her father enrolled her in a private academy in New York.

Her Grandma had gotten much better, it was surprising how well Moonyoung's grandmother had gotten. She could even walk with a cane and did not need to be pushed around in a wheelchair. Moonyoung was very relieved, she could not imagine losing her grandmother, not anytime soon.

It was her last week. She had decided to meet up with Suho. She needed a fresh start going to America, and she wanted to get closure on one last thing. Her feelings for Lee Suho. She and Suho had decided to meet up at an upscale restaurant that they use to go to.

Suho was already sitting there and waiting for Moonyoung as she entered, in her petite figure adorned in a flower dress that stopped right above her knee. "Hi," she greeted breathlessly, sitting down in front of Suho. "You look nice today," Suho said nonchalantly. "I ordered for you your regular order; steak, medium rare, and a side of salad,"

Moonyoung nodded thankfully, "So, why did you want to meet up?" Suho asked, "I just wanted to tell you that I'm moving abroad, again," Moonyoung said as the waitress brought out the food and the two started to dig in, both cutting up their steaks. "Why? I thought you were going to stay-- for good," Suho said, taking a bite.

"This steak is still just as good as I remember," Moonyoung mused, "Seoul isn't the same anymore, even after i made up with you guys, It just feels like I'm trying to be my old self. Myself with Seyeon," she swallowed her steak, "I want the room to grow --- and Seoul, feels like a fever dream. I used to love Seoul, but after Seyeon I feel like Seoul is suffocating. I returned to Seoul for closure, and i got it."

Suho nodded in understanding. Staying silent for a while. The two stayed silent, just eating their steak. They didn't need to talk to express their feelings, they knew each other so well that their feelings were second nature to the other. "I understand," Suho finally said, breaking their comfortable silence. "It's your life, do what you want,"

Moonyoung nodded, "I also wanted to say that I'm sorry," Suho raised an eyebrow in confusion, "-- For pulling away. I grew distant lately, right?" Suho nodded, his facing frowning lightly. "Well, I'm sorry for that," Moonyoung finally said.

"Why did you pull away?" Suho asked, finally looking up from his plate for the first time. "I thought we were growing close again," Suho added, frowning slightly. "I pulled away because I was scared," Moonyoung smiled, also looking up from her plate.

"What are you scared of?" Suho asked, "You are so clueless," Moonyoung laughed sourly, before taking in a deep breath "Because I like you," Suho and Moonyoung went silent, but this time it was an uncomfortable silence. Suho seemed to be deep in thought, thinking about his next move.

"Why are you telling me this?" Suho asked, Moonyoung laughed, "God, you are very egotistical," Moonyoung remarked, "I'm telling you so I can move on, I want a fresh start," Suho nodded, then stayed silent. "I don't want my feelings to get in the way of our friendship. Can we just stay friends? And you'll just ignore that I ever told you this," Suho nodded again, his face breaking into a small smile.

"Friends?" she asked, extending her hand out as Suho took it, with no hesitation. "Friends," Suho agreed as the two friends shook hands. They spent the rest of their time eating, laughing, and just enjoying one another's presence.

IT WAS HER LAST DAY. Moonyoung strolled around her home in Korea for one last time. She then went to the garage and took out her old friend. That matte black motorbike she had stopped riding. She wiped the dust of and put the key into the keyhole and turned to the engine on. The engine roared.

Putting her helmet on, Moonyoung took one last ride around town. She went to prince comics where she had ramen by herself while she re-read her favorite comic, she then went to the mall and just strolled around, buying a few things that she would not be able to find in America. She went to that tteokboki place one last time, stuffing her face with a shit ton of tteokboki. She then went to get her hair cut, a symbol of a fresh start, cutting away the baggage she had amassed over the years.

She then, finally drove to the cemetery. She got off and had gone to Seyeon's gave. Bending down, she sat next to the grave. "Seyeon," she murmured wistfully, "I'll be gone by tomorrow. I love you," and then she had gone silent. just staring at the full moon. Maybe hours had passed but Moonyoung finally got up and drove home. She had planned to call Seojun and Suho, but by then, she was too tired. She just fell on her bed and drifted off to dreamland.

The next morning came, and Moonyoung by then, was gone. She was on the airplane, sleeping in her first-class seat as her favorite K-Drama played in the background. Little did she know, Lee Suho was sitting a few rows behind her, bawling his eyes out. And she finally in America. New soil, her beginnings.

Slowly, she lost contact with everyone. She had tried to keep in contact with Seojun, Soo-ah, and Jukyung, but had eventually stopped trying. She focused on herself and was alone. She wasn't lonely, she was just alone. alone, happy, and at peace.

Maybe she thought that after she had told Suho her feelings, that she would stop liking him. But it didn't stop, she continued to like him, but maybe her expression of her old feelings had helped, she felt new, as if some weight had been lifted off her shoulders. It was a new beginning for her, and maybe, just maybe, she might lose those old feelings.