Cold Feet

34, Sweet Essence

Tw; ØD mentions, drûg mention

Damiano

The past week has been rather odd to say the least.

It's been a week since I started my meds again. My doctor said one each morning for a week to ease myself on them.

The voices are less frequent and I'm grateful for that, but the first few days they wouldn't stop.

On the third day, I woke up in a cold sweat screaming. It was around 2am. I still don't know why I was screaming. Nightmare, perhaps. Seems to be the only logical explanation.

Everyone here helped me through the week.

Coraline would always stay with me during the night, she was told this was an after affect from the incident. I wouldn't expect her to have stayed all night. I understand she doesn't want to be here, but I appreciate her help so much.

Thomas would distract me throughout the day with the play station or workouts. He knew I'd zone out if he tried to have a long conversation with me, so he kept the conversations small.

Ethan would cook different meals through the days, some days he'd have to force feed me as I refused.

Of course I still didn't tell Victoria, I want to leave it for as long as I can. Hopefully when I can say I'm better so she understands. We also told her that what I'm experiencing is the after affects from the incident setting in.

Victoria has been of help too though. Keeping me company for the most part and making sure I stayed hydrated. I think one night she even fell asleep in my room after Coraline left. That one night I couldn't sleep and practically forced Coraline out the door for her to go sleep.

When the voices were present, I'd just ignore them. A lot easier to do on meds. Now when I hear them, i only do the good things they tell me, like get up and shower on bad days.

I've appreciated everyone's help so much.

"Damiano, you're meant to be upping your dose tomorrow, is that right?"

I lift my head at the mention of my name and direct my attention to Mandy across the room.

About 10 different faces all stare at me, awaiting my answer.

"That's right. My doctor said it's time" I reply.

I really didn't want to be here, but it was one of my conditions of leaving the hospital that I see a psychologist and attend monthly meetings. Like Alcoholics Anonymous, but for drug abusers, because apparently if you accidentally overdose twice you're an abuser.

This place isn't for people like me. This place is for cocaine and heroin abusers. People that need real help. They don't need to be sat here and listen to the story of a world famous rockstar who got doped up on sleeping pills and it turned wrong.

"Have you experienced any negative side effects in the week you've eased them on?"

I shake my head. "No, it was a lot nicer than I thought. A few days I'd be zoned out for hours, but I don't count that as negative"

"Of course not. Now I'm aware that for your next two scheduled meetings you won't be in town, so I'm going to go ahead and pass this information on to your psychologist, who I'd trust you'll keep in touch with?"