Just Surface Level Good

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Not meant to be loved
Not meant to be desired
Not meant to be comforted

Some things don't belong to everyone
The more I grow
I clearly see that love never grows for people like me
To the ones who can be good for short while
The ones whose wounds cry
They can't be loved no more

Loneliness is all that awaits me
I knew from the start but I wanted
How desperately I fought for love
Yet I know now that only loneliness awaits
It will be fine though
I'm too cowardly to die
Yet my dreams are full of knives against my throat

Kill me
Heal me no more
End me
So I suffer no more

Surface level good doesn't last
The people think you are good
But wait
Just wait for those close to you
Oh the stories they could tell
Not one good thing
That's how bad I am
Yet no one knows
They are all full of pretty lies

One day, they'll know
That someone like me was hell
The goodness in me was fake
All I am is an illusion of good
I hurt people
I cause pain
I make them cry
More than I ever made them happy

That's real story of surface level good
People like me have are nothing but loads
We die awake in our own misery
So grant us no pity
But stay away
Save yourselves from surface level good

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No comment :)

Take care,
Sera

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