Sam- I think Jake is in trouble.
Colby- Alright. Struggling to give a fuck if I'm honest.
---
Jake: So... I've seen you've been spending a lot of time with Colby recently.
Sam: No, Jake, it's not what it looks like, I swear.
Jake: Oh really? So no reason for me to be jealous?
Sam: No! You're the only one for me.
Jake: Is that so?
Sam: I promise! Colby and I are just dating, okay? He's my partner.
Jake: So there are no best-friends-feelings involved?
Sam: You are still my one and only best friend! He's just the love of my life, nothing more!
Jake: But I'm still the platonic love of your life, right?
Sam: Of course bro!
Jake: Bro...
Colby: What the-
---
Sam- Here is my wall of inspirational people.
Colby- Is that a picture of you?
Sam- Yes, I am big enough to admit that I am often inspired by myself.
---
Sam- Oh, fiddlesticks.
Colby- Look, I understand this is a tense situation, but let's watch the fucking language.
---
Colby- Jake was banned from the chicken shack, so we had to go out of town to get some.
Jake- Well, they shouldn't say "all you can eat" if they don't mean it.
Colby- Jake, you ate a chair.
---
Colby, holding out an allium and looking away: Here.
Sam, physically vibrating as he takes it: I like this a normal amount
---
Colby: can I get a hug?
Sam:
Sam: *running away*
Colby: oh... : (
Jake, squinting at something in the distance: ...I think he's coming back
Colby smiling and looking at Sam: wait, really?!
Sam: *sprinting at Colby as fast as he can with his arms held out*
Colby:
Colby, panicked: oh fuck
---
Elton: We call THAT a traumatic event.
Elton, to Colby: Not a "bruh moment."
Elton, to Sam: Or a "major L."
Elton, to Jake: Or an "oof lmao."
---
Elton, setting down a card: ace of spades
YOU ARE READING
XPLR
FanfictionGod I swear this one is going to be more organized and hopefully way better. And to clarify, all of this is platonic. I do not ship them romantically, I believe they are each other's platonic soulmate and if you have a problem with that then leave.
