Sam: Jake, how could you possibly have gotten into this much trouble in one day?
Jake: It... It didn't take me the whole day...
---
*trapped in a room*
Jake: We need to get out of here, but we gotta get through this door first. Colby, give me your credit card!
Colby, handing it to him: Here
Jake, pocketing it: Nice. Corey, kick the door down.
---
Colby: I can explain.
Sam: Can you?
Colby: If you give me thirty seconds to think of a lie.
---
Sam: maybe i die. skydiving explosion. and then you go and marry Kat. and it makes me sad. but if she's gonna be with somebody, I'd like it to be you.
Colby: strange, but sweet.
Sam: only I didn't really die. I was faking it. and I come back. I spy on you from my red corvette. and I'm planning to kick your ass, but I see how happy you make her. and I have to walk away. I have to. and I do. slowly. in a rainstorm.
Jake: okay, this isn't really in the spirit of what we're trying to do.
Sam: but as time goes by, it eats away at me. you're out living it up with my girlfriend. and I'm alone. in a cave. training.
Corey: anyone else want to chime in?
Sam: I thought you were my friend... I THOUGHTYOU WERE MY FRIEND!!
---
Sam: you're late.
Colby: I wasn't even going to come, don't start.
---
Nate, walking through a haunted place: I just have some worries as well as some concerns that could potentially turn into outright fears.
Nate, hearing a noise: oh, there they go. They're fears now.
---
Sam: I relate to belle because she loves books and likes people for who they are.
Colby: I relate to Tinkerbell because she needs attention or she dies.
---
Sam: okay I'm going to need you to swear-
Colby: fuck
Sam: ...
Sam: swear as in promise
---
Sam: I think we're missing something
Nate: Teamwork?
Seth: Cohesion?
Colby: A general sense of what we're doing?
---
Colby: you could've died!
Sam: I wasn't hurt that badly! the doctor said all my bleeding was internal
Sam: that's where the bloods supposed to be!
---
Sam: I mean, small animals are way more vicious. it's because their anger has less space to be bottled up in
Katrina: that's ridiculous. give me one example of this
Sam: spiders
Colby: wasps
Corey: terriers
Jake: Tara
---
Elton: so wait, when white claws are involved, you can suddenly do math in your head?
Sam: hold on, Colby, what is 19,154 white claws divided by 61 white claws?
Colby: 314 white claws
Sam: what if they were Smirnoff's?
Colby: well, it's the... carry the 4... it doesn't work
---
Colby: do you have any skeletons in your closet?
Jake: you mean literally or figuratively?
Colby: honestly, the fact that I have to specify...
---
YOU ARE READING
XPLR
FanfictionGod I swear this one is going to be more organized and hopefully way better. And to clarify, all of this is platonic. I do not ship them romantically, I believe they are each other's platonic soulmate and if you have a problem with that then leave.
