Sam, bad at introductions: I really like your name.
Colby, confused: Thanks I got it for my birthday.
---
Sam: You know ketchup is technically a smoothie.
Colby: I love you, but please don't whisper the things in my ear at 2am.
---
Sam: It's the inside that matters.
Colby: Really? Give one example?
Sam: A refrigerator.
Colby: Good point.
---
Colby: Jake, why is the milk cart filled with grape soda?
Jake: ...
Jake: It came from a purple cow?
---
Corey: Nothing in life is free.
Jake: Life is free.
Sam: Adventure is free.
Elton: Knowledge is free.
Colby: Everything is free if you run fast enough.
---
Sam: English is weird.
Sam: "You ain't shit" and "you are shit" are both insults.
Colby: But "you are the shit" is a compliment.
Jake: Guys, it's fucking 3am. Go to sleep.
---
Colby: Have you ever looked at your ex and thought, "Was I drunk the whole relationship?"
---
Jake,holding a pot of coffee and a cereal bowl: What if instead of putting milk in my cereal, I put coffee instead?
Sam, walking past him and taking the coffee pot away: What if you didn't?
---
Sam: What do you do in your free time?
Colby: I stalk.
Sam: Really? I like to go to the park or hang out with friends.
Colby: I know.
---
Colby: I have a plan.
Sam: Does it involve us getting in trouble?
Colby: *stares at Sam for 10 minutes*
Colby: I said a plan, not a miracle.
---
Killer 1: What are your names?
Corey: Don't tell them our names Colby!
Killer 1: So that's Colby.
Colby: Good job Corey!
Killer 1: And that's Corey.
Elton: Sam, don't you dare say anything!
Killer 2: So that one is Sam.
Sam: God dang it Elton!
Killer 2: And that one's Elton.
Killer 1: That was easy.
---
I have no idea, I was high while writing this. I do that a lot actually, I get high because I have nothing to do 🤷🏻♀️
YOU ARE READING
XPLR
FanfictionGod I swear this one is going to be more organized and hopefully way better. And to clarify, all of this is platonic. I do not ship them romantically, I believe they are each other's platonic soulmate and if you have a problem with that then leave.
