Loving in Another Universe (The Friend Zone Series 1)

~02~

On the day that we will go out, he already came in front of my house dala ang kotse niya na Forbes red.. wow sana all rich kid. Ang aga aga pa nga eh, buti ginising ako ni Rando.

"Hi, Stella!" he waved. Ang cute makita yung eye smile niya huh, naka face mask si gago eh.

Ngumiti din ako pabalik at pinagbuksan siya ng pinto, "Come in! Kain ka muna sa loob since maaga pa naman." Tumango siya at pumasok na sa loob.

Sinalubong siya ni Fernando, Rando for short, na parang nag hug sila in a bro way, gets? Like one hand gamit tas tapik sa isa't isa sa likod. Pff, I find it cute though.

Rando is my one and only little brother na grade 11 student at same school pa kami nag-aaral. STEM ang kinuha niyang strand. Napakakulit netong lalaki, ang pilosopo pa mag salita minsan. Pero kahit ganon siya, mahal na mahal ko ito, eh.

"Kuya Matthew! long time no talk ah. Kamusta na po?" Masiglang bati ng kapatid ko kay Matt since magkakilala naman na sila last year. Wala si Yaya Wena kapag Sunday  since nasa pamilya niya siya, kaya habang nag-uusap sila, pinaghanda ko ng breakfast sila Rando at Matt. 

Yung magulang naman namin natutulog sa kwarto nila since Monday to Saturday work nila, I understand naman kaya gagawin ko best ko mapasaya sila at makapagpahinga after their hard work they did for us.

Tumawa ng mahina si Matt pero rinig parin namin yun. "Ayun, busy sa online class. Ikaw, 'musta? Nag aaway parin ba kayo ng ate mo?" asar nyang tanong na nag patigil sakin sa paghahanda sa aming pagkain. Alam ko naka ngisi siya ngayon kahit nakatalikod ako sa kanila.

"Hoi! Ano naman kinalaman ko diyan? Minsan na lang kami nag aaway, noh? At tsaka eto breakfast niyo ang aga aga mo pa nga pumunta amp" Inis na sabi ko sa kanya dahil 10am kasi ang usapan pero 7am siya pumunta dito. Sayang ang beauty rest! Excited yarn?

Nag-usap sila ni Rando habang kumakain at sumasali naman ako sa usapan kapag naririnig ko pangalan ko. Ang saya talaga kapag may kasama habang kumakain tas aasarin ka... sobra saya!

After we ate breakfast, umalis na kami ng bahay at pinasabi ulit kay Rando sa aming mga magulang na aalis ako for a week lang with Matt and of course hindi namin kakalimutan mag face mask at ang alcohol.

Matt is the one who consistently takes photos on our first day and posts them to Twitter or Instagram. Since he doesn't take pictures when we're with friends, I was intrigued, and he said that he would save these images and videos as memories.

Oh memories ... Gawa din kaya akong souvenirs para sa future jowa ko? Eh, no. Ayoko na magka jowa!!

We took a road trip to Tagaytay, where we went to the beach and enjoyed watching the waves and the sunset together. Also, we stared at the moon in the wonderful sky. Matt said it was pretty lovely.

But he said it as he saw me gazing up at the sky. Plus, I was giggling.

We watched the movie we wanted in his cottage on the second to last day of the week, after which I asked as to what and why he like the film. I didn't predict that his reasoning would be that the guy went beyond the mark to win the girl's affection, despite the fact that it was only a one-sided love.

Elle called after the movie ended. Kasama niya daw si Gavi.

Call:

Elle: Hoy musta na? wala ka na paramdam, Stella gurl

Gavi: Oo nga eh, kayo na ba? Nakikita ko mga posts ni Matt ah.

Stella: Baliw, nag hangout lang kami!

Elle: Pero aminin mo nagiging masaya ka with him ayieee

Stella: Oo I'm happy with him and I find comfort in him...

Gavi: Basta ingatan mo yan puso mo aber at tandaan mo na masaya kami para sayo... 

Elle: Pasabi kay Matt na pasalamat siya at hindi ko siya masasapak ngayon, you both know the rules.

But why do I only see him only as a friend? Ayoko siya paasahin at saktan though. We have two days left and I have been thinking that you don't deserve someone like me, Matt. 

Why me?

AT YUNG FIRST RULE PA NAMAN AY BAWAL MA IN LOVE SA CIRCLE OF FRIENDS NA ITO, hays.

Twitter pm:

@itsmeStella: Matt!!

@MatthewG: baket? Magkatabi lang tayo bakit pa dito tayo nag uusap?

@itsmeStella: wala lang hehehe

@MatthewG: Baliw HHAHAHA may sasabihin ka ba? Kung gusto mo tumae, may cr naman dito.

Loko amputa.

@itsmeStella: Since nasabi mo yung reason mo about the movie, are you okay in what we have right now? Like the both of us... just friends?

@MatthewG: Oo naman masaya ako dahil at least napatunayan ko kung gaano kita kamahal at kaya alagaan.

I'm sorry, Matt, but just one statement in his response made me feel like my heart had just froze. He is too sweet and priceless to be hurt. I'm not the kind of person he deserve. Unhealed and broken. I must first heal myself. Matt should be quite happy. I am not the one who can show him love, even though he deserves it. 

Magkakasakitan lamang kami. Yes, I feel comfort in him, binibigyan niya ako ng pagmamahal na kailangan ko, pero mahal ko siya bilang kaibigan lang.

On our last day, we went hiking as this is one of my favorite things to do.

Nang makapunta na kami sa tuktok ng bundok na pinuntahan namin, umupo kami para magpahinga habang tinitingnan ang maganda na sunset.

Palubog na naman ang araw. Malapit na matapos at mag online class na naman kami.

Huminga ako ng malalim at sinalubong ang mukha nya na naka tingin din pala sa sunset. 

"Matt," tawag ko sa kanya na tinugon naman niya. "Maraming salamat talaga sa pagpayag at pagsama sakin buong week at gawin mga bagay na gusto ko gawin lalo na't di tayo pinalabas last year dahil lockdown." Masayang pasasalamat ko sa kaniya.

Tumingin na siya sakin na may ngiti sa labi, "Wala 'yun. Masaya talaga ako na kasama kita ngayon kahit saglit lang."

Nalungkot ako sa sinabi niya at baka mag overthink na siya, "Oi... huwag ka mag overthink o isipin mo na ginagamit kita para mag move on kay Kiro, ah. Sobrang saya ko din na nakasama kita buong linggo at ramdam ko ang pagmamahal na ipinakita at binigay mo sakin. Though, I am still sorry dahil you don't deserve someone like me na durog pa."

Naramdaman ko din na bumabasa na ang mata ko, na isang pikit ko na lang maluluha na ako.

Niyakap ako ni Matt dahil napansin niya siguro na paos ang boses ko at doon sa yakap na 'yun, ay binuhos ko na ang mga luha na gusto pa lumabas kanina pa. He is silently patting my back for comfort.

Nang tumahan na ako, pinunas niya ang mata ko using his two thumbs at sinabi sakin, "May I ask you a favor?"

Tumango ako na hindi nagsasalita dahil napagod na siguro boses ko sa kakaiyak kanina.

"Find someone who will make you happy. Do not lose that lovely smile of yours. Do not allow someone loss that smile, okay? Find someone who will accept and adore you for the rest of your life, something I can't and did not do with you." Nakita ko na nangingilid na ang luha niya kaya niyakap ko siya ng mahigpit na ginawa din naman niya sakin.

"If you're happy, even if I'm not the reason, I will still be happy for you, Stella."

I won't promise but I will try. Kahit hindi ko alam ang totoong dahilan bakit ako ang gusto mo, thank you for everything, Matthew! Please be happy with someone else too.