I'm his | Draco Malfoy

Doesn't it matter what I want?

"Is it true?" Draco asks, looking down at the marble floor. I startle. "What? Draco-" "Did you kiss Potter?" he continues, finally looking in my eyes. His cold irises are digging inside mine, but for once, I know he's only searching the truth, genuinely and simply. "I-" I don't know why I can't answer the question. It's like Harry and Draco, together in the same room, with me, both waiting for me saying something... it's too much for my dry mouth. "I" I try to say, but he looks at Harry and then at me and comes near me briskly. "Just so you know, I fucked Pansy Parkinson" he murmurs inside my ear.

I can't even think about what he said consciously. Jealousy, rage, disappointment, all are rushing through my body like adrenaline. "Fuck you, Draco" I say, stomping out of the room. While I'm almost running, I hear Harry's muffled voice saying "You're so stupid. She didn't kiss me, you idiot." I stop, tired, and I immediately feel tears down my cheeks. I can almost see his gaze, and his hidden grin. "What?" Draco says, taken off guard. "But maybe she should have" I think I hear, because Harry's voice is suddenly lower.

"What did you just say?" Draco asks. I think he's come nearer to Harry.

"You don't deserve her. She's exactly what you are not. She's kind, she's sweet, she's pure. You're just hurting her." I am astonished by Harry's words. I've never heard him saying such mean words, because I know these are harming Draco more than any insult ever could. He's told me about his insecurities. Harry doesn't imagine.

"I know" Draco whispers. "But I would never hurt her." "Nor would I. And you just did, by the way, in case you didn't notice." I know Harry's going on because he's sure Draco is taken off guard by his words about me.

"I didn't- I didn't do it on purpose." "Who cares?" Harry seems mad now. "Who fucking cares, Malfoy? She's hurt now and you can't help her." I move forward closer to the entry of the room, careful not to let them see me.

"What would you know, Potter? You've only cared about her since she's become popular like you and your friends." Draco's words definitely hurt, mostly because I know they're probably true.

"That's bullshit. Honestly. I don't want to lose another bit of my time with you. And she probably doesn't either. Why would you harm her this way? I didn't think you could be this cruel." How can he be this cruel?

"I l-" I enter the room rudely. I can't stand this anymore. "Via?" Harry asks. "I thought you were-" Draco sighs heavily. "I'll leave now. So you two can be alone." I don't understand how, after he's heard the truth, he still believes there's something between me and Harry. He probably influenced him.

Draco leaves, touching me with his broken look and figure.

I look at his shadow vanishing because I know he would never like what I'm about to tell Harry, then come closer to him. "You-"

He doesn't let me finish and suddenly grabs my chin, forcing my lips onto his. I exhale in his mouth, surprised. I can't say I haven't dreamed about this when we were children, but now it's all different.

His delicate lips move with urge against mine. He doesn't put in his tongue and I'm glad because I know I wouldn't like it. Not like this, not with what just happened.

After a few seconds, I step back. He seems both resigned and amazed.

"Why did you do it?" I murmur, looking in his green eyes, searching the answer.

"I've been wanting to do that for a long time."

"Doesn't it matter what I want?" I say, defiantly. "After what you did to me?"

I see him flinching slightly, his shoulders falling. My breath is scattered, my heart is faster than ever, my eyes are burning to hold in the tears.

Without letting him reply, I walk out the room. He doesn't call for me.

"Draco!" I call, hoping he didn't go too far. I see his sitting near the room, and I hope he didn't hear what we just said each other. His look tells me he did.

"I didn't kiss Harry at home, Draco, I swear" I look at him, sitting close to him but not too much in case he doesn't want me to.

"He kissed you now, didn't he?" His voice seems choked.

I exhale. "Yes."

He seems bothered but I know another thing is worrying him now.

"What did you mean with, 'after what you did to me'?"

I gasp, praying for air. My head feels dizzy.

"Olivia" he says, coming closer to me and raising his hand ... to place it on my cheek.

"You just flinched" he notices. "You flinched hard."

"I didn't. I'm just cold."

He raises a hand again, to touch me, and I turn my head, quickly, realising too late why my behaviour is so weird with him now.

"Did he hit you?" Draco's voice is suddenly so strained and cold. "Did he force you to kiss him?"

I don't respond, unsure of what to say. I just breath deeply, grasping for my lungs to be full of air. "Olivia, answer me."

I nod very slowly. Will he be mad now?

"Rodolphus, and then Potter." I stay quiet. "I'm going to kill him."

He stands up abruptly, giving me a look. "Nobody can touch you that way."

He leaves, entering the room where Harry is still standing deflated, and I cover my ears and eyes with my hands as I did as a kid when Mom fought with Dad when he picked me up from her's.

I'm not okay. I'm not okay. I'm not okay.

Did Draco really lay with Pansy? Did Harry really just force me to kiss him?

Is all of this real?

It can't be. Can it?

I need Draco to help me live.