When the Past Returns

My New Beginning

A few months later, mine and David's divorce had been final. I didn't get anything except for getting away from him. The guys took me out to eat to celebrate and I hit my 26th birthday.

We all got drunk again. This time it was a little different. I was a little different. I flirted with guys and sometimes I'd flirt with my guys. I knew they were all married but my drunken state didn't care. It wanted everybody. I was a black widow and they were my prey.

"Oh god." I groan, sitting up in bed and ruffling my hair. The white, thin sheet covering my body falls to my waist and I fall back into bed. My natural brown hair falls back onto my face and I grunt. I look to my right and see a mess of black hair. "Oh, my god." I say. I quickly get out of bed, dress, and run out of the hotel room. I didn't know who's room I was in or who I ended up sleeping with. I can only remember dancing up against some guys then being led to a hotel room.

I run into Vince as I run down the hall. "Hey, where are you going?" He asks, holding me in place. "Vinny, I have to go. I need to. I'm sorry. I'll see you soon. I love you guys. Good luck." I say in one big rush and run to the stairwell. "Wait!" I hear him yell, but I'm running too fast to stop. I run down the stairs, into the lobby, and into the street.

••THREE MONTHS LATER••
I got word that Nikki and Brandi welcomed their baby boy, Gunner Nicholas. Was I happy? Sure, I guess so. He was happy, right? I only want the guys happy. But I had my own problems to deal with. That drunken night resulted in my pregnancy. Who's was it? I don't know. But Vince and Sharise invited me to lunch with them, so I decided to accept it.

I get in the shower, dress nicely, and drive to the restaurant they chose. After arriving, I go in and quickly find them. "Hey, thanks for inviting me, guys." I say, hugging them. "We missed you. We all do." Sharise says with a smile. I laugh lightly and nod. We order and talk about how life has been for each other. Then I get to my problem. "Can you keep a promise for me? Please." I ask, looking around as if it's a secret code I'm about to spill. "Sure, honey. What is it?" Sharise asks. "I'm pregnant." I say as fast and quietly as I can. They look at each other then back at me. Or rather past me. "What?" I ask as I turn around. "Where have you been? You left. Is that why?" Nikki stood behind my chair and points to my stomach.

I get up and look at him in shock. He was standing in front of me. "Yes, I left because I didn't want any of you giving me money or anything." I say. It was true. To a point. "We love you, Abigail. You're our best friend. You've given us money before. You've let us stay in your house. You've let us use your car. And you're worried about us giving you some money to support yourself an your kid more?" He asks, raising his voice. "Nikki, please not now. Anyways, how've you been?" I ask, sitting down. Nikki jerks the chair next to me out from under the table. "I've been good. Gunner was born." He says, sitting down. "Congratulations. I hope he's being good." I say. "He's acting as a baby should." He says then takes a drink of my water.

"Thank you for the lunch, guys. I'll see you around." I say, standing up and leaving my half of the bill. "Abby..." somebody says, but doesn't continue. I walk out the door, making the bell sound out. I get into my car and just sit in silence. "Abigail, you need to straighten up. You can do this. Just believe." I whisper to myself. I start the car and drive home.

••ONE YEAR LATER••
I had the baby, a girl. Her name is Juniper Lotus. I haven't spoken to the guys since the lunch I had with Vince, Sharise, and Nikki. I know who Juniper's father is. She has his eyes. Green. I'm screwed.

I put Juniper in her stroller, strap her in, and head out. I walk along the strip and sing to her. "Hey. Aren't you Nikki's friend?" A lady asks. "Oh. Hi, Brandi. Yeah, how are y'all doing?" I ask, brushing my hair out of my face. "We're doing good. Is this little lady yours? She's so adorable. Gunner would love to have a playmate." She says, playing with Juniper's toes. "This is Juniper. She's my daughter." I say, looking at them. "She has the prettiest eyes. Green with black hair. Amazing." She says. "She's beautiful. She gets it from her father." I say. "Well she's blessed to have two amazing and beautiful parents. But I have to go. Gunner's sick with a cold. Maybe we can all meet up one day. Soon." She says, hugging me. "Sure. Whenever your little guy gets better. I wish him well." I say as she leaves.

I continue walking down the strip while singing to June to keep her from crying. "Did you hear what they said?" "That Susan is supposed to be prom Queen? I doubt that. I'm going to take it. She stole my boyfriend from 7th grade...." I hear some girls say as they walk past. "Why are girls like that?" Somebody asks, startling me. "Jesus christ. What the- Vince!" I shout, hugging him. "Abby, we've missed you." He says then I look behind him. All in line was Vince Neil, Nikki Sixx, Mick Mars, and Tommy Lee. "I've missed you, too. I just thought with having a baby I'd be in the way." I say, pushing June's stroller lightly back and forth. "You wouldn't be in the way. You're our best friend." Tommy says, looking at June. "She's so pretty." He says as his finger is trapped in her death grip.

"Like I told Brandi, she gets it from her father." I say. "I don't believe that. She gets it from her mother. Just look at her. She's so beautiful." Mick says. "Okay, thank you for that. But really. She looks more like her father than me. The only feature she has of me is her dark hair." I say, smoothing down her curls. "Her eyes remind me of- oh my god."