When the Past Returns

Not My Home

1996

After five years, I moved to Florida. Juniper was now 5 and she had become very reserved. She never talked to anyone except for me. She didn't make friends except with Gunner. But for whatever reason, Brandi began keeping him away from us. Then she and Nikki had two more kids, Storm and Decker. I wanted to talk to her about why she was keeping Gunner away. She started a fight with me in front of all the kids. Tommy has a son, Brandon, with Pamela Anderson. Vince and Sharise divorced after the death of their daughter, Skylar. I got a tattoo in her memory. She was a sweet little girl and June loved her. Nikki is getting a divorce from Brandi and I'm told he's met another woman. They plan to marry. Donna E'rrico.

I walk into June's room and find her asleep on the floor. "Abby, just go to bed. I'll put her in bed for you. Don't worry, okay? It's bad for the baby." Alex says. Call me whatever you want, but the baby isn't his. It's June's father's baby. How? We had a big party for mine and Alex's life together and I got drunk. So did her father. We had sex and now I'm pregnant. "Thank you." I head to my room and slip into my night gown.

I sit on the bed and sigh. I need to straighten myself out. Suddenly, June screams and Alex curses. I run into her room and see Alex on the other side of the room with June's pj bottoms in his hand. "What the fuck?! Alexander, get the fuck out of my house. Stay the fuck away from my daughter, my unborn child, and myself. Stay the fuck away!!!" I yell, punching him. We end up outside, yelling at each other, hitting each other, and drawing a crowd. "Hey, what's going on here?" A guy asks, pulling me off of Alex and keeping me held against him. "He touched my daughter. He tried to rape her!" I shout. "Momma!! Please stay with me. Don't leave me." Juniper runs from the doorway of the house to me and holds my leg.

Soon there are sirens signaling that the police are coming and two guys have Alex pinned down. I pick up June and calm her down. About five minutes later, the police and ambulance arrive. They handcuff Alex and question everyone. June and I were checked by the paramedics and cleared.

June and I moved back to LA and met up with Tommy, Pamela, and little Brandon. Juniper played carefully with Brandon while the adults talked.

"I really need to straighten my shit together. Juniper isn't going to be able to make any friends if we continue to move." I say, taking a sip from my cup. "Why don't you just stay here for the rest if your life?" Pamela asks. "Complications with my inner self." "And Nikki. We know, Abby. He's June's dad. He doesn't know. He should know. What about that Cooper guy?" Tommy asks. "He molested June." I whisper. "Shit. I'm sorry. He's in jail, right?" "I don't think so. Sex offender." I get up and pick up Brandon. "Another 3 months and I'll have another little one." I say then kiss Brandon's cheek. "Is he Alex's?" "No. Nikki's." I look up at the cloudy sky and sigh.

After a few hours of talk, we decide to head home. They said that tomorrow night will be the night we all meet up for dinner. "June, get ready for bed. I'll be there in a minute." I say, sitting down on the couch and start sorting through the picture bag. Because we just moved in, I decided to actually work on making this house be our home forever. Juniper walks into the room and sits beside me. "Juny, are you ready?" I ask, rubbing her back. She nods and I lead her to her room. "Momma, goodnight. I love you." Juniper says, climbing into bed and pulling the blanket up to her chin. "Goodnight my little angel. I love you. Sweet dreams." I say then kiss her forehead. As I walk out of her room, I shut off her light and go to the living room to resume my picture sorting.

I come across the last picture that was taken of the guys and I. It was lined up with Mick, Tommy, my pregnant self, Vince, and Nikki. I place it in a frame, set it next to the other frames of my family, and continue on. I pull out the last picture I got from my grandparents of them and my little sister, Haley. She was 13. I sigh and put it in the photo album that I was currently working on. I finish it up and move on to the next one. I yawn, stretch, and lean back. "Fuck it." I mutter, get up, and go to bed.

"Momma, wake up!" Juniper shouts, jumping on the bed. "June, calm down. Stop." I say with my eyes closed. "Fine." She says and the jumping stops. "Thank you. I'll be in the kitchen to make breakfast in a minute." I say. She lays beside me and holds my hand. "Remember that we have dinner with some friends tonight, okay?" I say. She nods then gets out of bed. I decide to follow her so I can start breakfast. "Sit down, honey." I say, getting out eggs and bacon. Instead she opens the door and laughs. "Juniper Lotus! Get back in- oh my god. What are you guys doing here?" I ask as Tommy, Pamela holding Brandon, Vince, Mick, Nikki, the girl I'm guessing is Donna, and his kids stand in the doorway. "We came to surprise you." Pam says, hugging me. "Well, come inside. Make yourselves at home. If you don't remember or know, this is my daughter, Juniper. June, say hi to everyone." I say. "Gunner!!" She shouts and hugs him. "Can we, momma? Please?" She asks, holding his hand. "Yeah, go ahead. Take Storm, too. Don't leave her behind." I say as they run off to June's room.

"How has everybody been?" I ask, sitting in one of the chairs across from them. "Writing new music." Mick says. "This is my wife, Donna. Donna, this is one of my best friends Abigail." Nikki says. Abigail, not Abby. That makes me feel like his feelings for me have changed. I go from best, best friend to best friend. Abby to Abigail. That kinda blows. I smile and turn my attention back to Mick.

After a few minutes, June tells me she's hungry and I go to the bathroom to brush my teeth like I had originally planned. I quickly cook her eggs and a bagel and sit with her while I talk with Nikki's kids. "We've missed you, Abby. Why'd you leave so many times?" Gunner asks. "I couldn't find myself. But I have now." I tell him.