Peaky blinders angel- Completed

Ashamed

Finn is 15

3 weeks before

Arthur pov

I was sat in another boring meeting. It was just me, Tommy, john and finn at this meeting. Tommy was in pain. Everything was getting to much for him but he refused to admit it.

"Tom, would ya just let it out. You need to talk to someone or cry or have a drink or just do something other than hide it away. It's putting us all in a bad mood"

"Piss off john" he muttered.

"No. I won't. Just fucking cry Tommy. Stop acting like your some sort of god who doesn't feel emotions." John says

"No"

"Why not? Why won't ya cry? Cuz ya think you are being all big and strong acting all tough when in reality this is making you weak. It is tearing your walls down and bring us with it" Tommy leaned against a chair and took a drag of his cigarette before saying

"Shelbys don't cry"

Present day

Finn pov

As roses older brother, my job was to protect her. But what if that wasn't possible? I can protect rose from the gang, the blood, physical pain. Emotional pain is the most difficult to stop. It comes at you like a swarm of bees, stinging you one by one until eventually, all you feel is agonising pain. Despite the greatest efforts if the most brilliant minds, no one can live a life without emotional pain. Some is less severe than others, but doesn't mean it isn't their. My mother died and my father left. It wasn't short term pain for me as I didn't know them, but it hurt in the long term. Knowing that I was forced to grow up without my parents. Financial stabability isn't a problem for our family, but it is for others. Some people struggle to feed their own children and can do nothing but watch them suffer. And for some, their pain is so loud and agonising that it takes over their life like a dark cloud covering a city. It bites down on them and it gets to a point where even life isn't worth living anymore and so they must end it. For their own sanity.

Rose was yet to experience strong emotional pain like losing a loved one. Too young to feel the effects of our mothers death and fathers abandonment, she lives a life surrounded by love. Recently, however, I have noticed the grief growing on her. When I pick her up from school, it starts with her tiny feet running towards me followed by me spinning her in the air. A grin on her face the entire time. But it is then replaced with a frown as she looks at the other children with their mother's. Heartbreak takes over my body as i see my little sister attempt to hide her jealousy.

I was currently on my way to the garrison with isiah when I see rose playing with some children. They are playing tag, running along the streets, kicking mud and dirt all up their trousers and skirts. She was playing with 5 boys and 4 girls. We had previously tried to keep her from playing with the boys but the women of the family sat us down and basically yelled in our faces about how we are ruining her chance of making friends. So out of pure fear, we allowed boys to be apart of her friend group. A woman walks out of her house and ushers 2 of the children inside. They look like twins. Me and isiah stopped to look at roses face fall. But they continue to play the game. Then, another woman walks out and whispers something in her child's ear making the boy whine at his mother. He too is dragged inside. This continues to happen until it is just rose and 1 boy left. His mother comes out and clearly not seeing us, yells

"Oscar. What in heavens name do you think you're doing? Get back inside before you lose your eyes" Oh crap. That's what was going on

"But mam, rose ain't like that. She's really nice" I see rose smile at the woman trying to convince her but the woman nervously smiles back before dragging the boy inside. Before they reach the door, I step infront and isiah steps behind her. As she watches our shadows, her eyes widen and her lips quiver.