Complicated Desire

Chapter Twenty-Two

Kade cooked dinner in Matt's kitchen, while Matt continued unloading the truck filled with all of Bianca's earthly belongings. The women sat in the living room, Kara and her mom sharing a bottle of wine, and Bianca sipping at her martini.

"Your dad was home," her mom spoke seemingly out of nowhere.

Bianca sat up from her slouching position. "He hadn't gone into work?"

"Nope. He looked like he hadn't slept for days. I've honestly never seen him like that, so distraught. I know he regrets what he said to you. I could see it in his eyes before Matt kicked him out, but now it seems like it's really sunk in. He knows the damage he's done can't be repaired with an apology."

"It can't," Bianca agreed. "Have you decided what you're going to do."

Her mom shrugged, then took another sip of her wine. "Kara and Matt have offered to let me stay for a while, and I'm taking them up on it. I turned in all my vacation days at work, which buys me about a month off. After that, I'll see how I feel. There are few things in life that are unforgivable, but moving past this is an entirely different story. I'm not sure yet if I'll be able to.

"I know your dad regrets every word he said, but the fact that he was able to say them to begin with... If our relationship stands a chance at surviving, I'm going to need more than his regret. I trusted him to love my children and I unconditionally, and your father broke that trust."

"I just want you to do what you think is best for you, mom," Bianca reassured her. "I feel the same as you do about Friday night, but I know he loves me. It's respect that he has to work on, and I get that it's hard for him to respect this decision. But even then, I'd hoped he'd respected me enough to show some amount of acceptance."

Bianca hadn't realized Kade had left the kitchen until she felt his strong arm wrap around her and pull her against his firm chest. "The pain will pass, Bianca. Most of his words were spoken to you, but those words and that anger were directed toward me. He knew no amount of his anger would faze me, so he went for you."

That probably was true. Kade remained completely calm that night, while Bianca stood there a silent mess. She appeared the weak link, and her dad thought breaking that link would break the relationship. Instead, it broke the family.

All because neither she nor Kade would bend to his will.

The feeling of his lips on the top of her head caused Bianca to lift her chin in hopes of something more. She needed it. The entire weekend was spent in despair. Now, with the dawn of a new week, Bianca just wanted to feel something lighter.

He obliged, but not without a few moments of hesitance. Kade's lips grazed hers twice, then came in to capture them just as his hand came up to cup her cheek. As Kade seemed forever in control over his emotions, the kiss never deepened into anything too intimate, and ended all together once the patio door opened.

Matt's glare could be felt before Bianca even looked over at him. Kade hadn't looked at all. Instead, he backed away from her chair and walked back into the kitchen.

"I can handle it," Matt mumbled, more to himself than anyone, then repeated the words. "I can handle it."

The baby monitor came to life with cries.

"I'll get it," Kara and Matt both seemed to say in unison, fleeing from the area in the blink of an eye.

It was then her mom stood, speaking over her shoulder as she walked toward the patio. "And I think I'll go unpack some of your things."

Kade didn't speak until the patio door closed behind her mother. "It seems our displays of affection still make them uncomfortable. Still, they're taking it far better than I could ever hope."

She made her way into the kitchen area and wrapped her arms around his torso as he kept busy at the stovetop. "I think they feel like they have to balance the scale. My dad was mad enough for everyone." When Kade had no response, she laid her cheek against her back. "You have something to say about that, don't you?"

Kade let out a slow breath. "I know you told your father to stay away from you, and if that's what you truly want, I'll respect that. But I think there are things you need to say to him, and I don't want you to regret leaving those words unspoken."

"It will be awhile before I'm ready to even think about that," Bianca admitted. "Right now, I wouldn't even be able to be in the same room with him without screaming. There's been too many words said in anger as it is."

Kade set something down on the counter, then turned in her grasp, sliding his hand in the back pockets of her jeans. The sweetest smile adorned his face as she looked up at him. "I can say it a hundred different ways, but I don't know if there are any words that exist to describe how in love with you I am. After a week of having you in my life, I know I want you there every day for the rest of it."

"You better not be proposing to me right now," Bianca teased.

He just shook his head. "Just didn't want to regret leaving those words unspoken. But I hope you understand that I do intend to marry you someday."

"You want to make me my brother's mother-in-law, huh?" The idea that once filled her with guilt and caused her stomach to turn now just filled Bianca with amusement.

Kade's eyes pinched shut and his smile vanished. "God, that really is the worst way possible to look at it, isn't it? Can't blame your brother one bit for still being salty."

"Can't hide from reality, baby."

A low chuckle shook his torso, and Kade pulled her closer. "If it gets me you, I can handle us being a Jerry Springer episode."

"You already have me," Bianca told him, leaning up to kiss him once more.