Codependent

Chapter 60

"Loki?" I asked in front of the door, but I didn't get a reaction.

Like any other person would predictably do is enter the room anyway, I opened it to see him sitting on the couch, not doing anything, just looking at the windows.

"I didn't say come in," his voice said softly  "We need to talk," I said and I felt Loki's urge to shut me down and make shit comments like 'oh so now you wanna talk?' but he stayed quiet.

I closed the door and felt my palms were sweaty, I walked over to Loki and sat down next to him also facing the window to give him more space.

"I'm sorry for what happened, but, I'm not sorry that it happened, just the way it did," I said and Loki looked to the side to me probably surprised at what I was saying.

"I never showed you before because I was afraid I couldn't deal with it, uhm, not because I didn't want to tell you," I continued and I felt Loki's irritation and anger calm down more. I looked back at him with sad eyes that were still red and puffy from all the crying.

"You could've told me," he said dryly making me sigh "I know, but I couldn't," I said and he just nodded as if he understood, but he didn't.

"Why aren't you listening to me?" I said sadly that he was too stubborn to try to understand me just because he wanted to stay angry, he was calming down but he was looking for a way to fight.

"Stop, I can feel you searching for my feelings," he said coldly and distant looking away again, I was too stunned to speak at his reactions. "You were in my mind, you promised me not to do that anymore," I said trying to get him to listen.

"I only wanted to check in on you in the presence of others until you sucked me into your memory!" he said irritated and I was clutching my fist trying to stay calm, he knew I hated it when someone raised their tone at me.

"And I'm sorry! I am! but you're not listening, don't try and make this a fight when I want to work things out," I said trying to convince him.

"Why don't you get angry, and just tell me everything that ever happened to you?!" he said raising his tone again making my body turn further away from him.

"Can't I just do it while I'm calm?" I said calmly, but I had the feeling that the calmer I was the more Loki was wanting to fight.

"Why aren't you mad?!" he said again standing up and walking away from me, I stood up as well but stayed in front of the couch.

"Why aren't you listening!?" I yelled at him with lots of volumes they could hear it on the whole floor, Loki turned around wide-eyed.

"No, you aren't listening! I only ever wanted for you to share your emotions and memories, but you kept it all for yourself scared of everything, but so was I! and I shared all of me with you!" he said yelling back at me feeling that this was his way of relief.

"I want to!" I said yelling back while stepping closer to him into the room, Loki's chest was expanding so wide I could hear his heart pump on adrenaline if the room was silent.

"Then tell me!" Loki said more determined than angry, we just kept looking at each other while we were standing closer than before both reaching for the words to say, we were both calm again in our presence but out of breath.

Loki took a big step closer and pressed his lips forcefully against mine, this only made my feelings increase and I kissed him back deeper burying my hands in his hair.

His hands around my waist and his body against mine, taking every breath from my mouth, I was gasping for the air I didn't get from the rush in the kiss and moaned softly into his mouth only making him kiss me deeper and more passionately.