Another love

Part Forty - Six

After everyone left, Sarah waited behind to speak to Tommy about his medicine. Tommy groaned as he found Sarah sat in his desk chair, sensing he was about to get told off for something.

"Sarah, if this is about the fucking plan."

"Why aren't you taking your medicine?" She asked as she put the empty bottle onto his desk.

Tommys nostrils flared as his jaw clenched "You went through my things."

Sarah shrugged not wanting to say that actually Mary had given her the bottle "Answer the question."

"They make me see things." He told her as he came and sat down opposite her, crossing his legs and lighting a cigarette as she studied him.

"What kind of things?"

"You don't want to know." Tommy replied exhaling smoke as Sarah stared at him "Things that I don't want to see."

"Would've thought having Lizzie around would make it better."

"Lizzie can't stop the dreams."

"The shovels?" Sarah asked softly.

Tommy looked at her in the eye with a feeling of sadness "Amongst other things."

"She can't stop them like Grace." Sarah phrased it as a question but it seemed like a statement

"I didn't have some of these dreams when Grace was around, and no I don't want to talk about them."

"I had no intention of asking." Sarah told him dryly "what I will say is, I don't give a fuck about your dreams. I just want you healthy. You were out of action for three months, so take the medicine or don't take it, but just remember everything you do comes back on Charles."

Tommy nodded to himself "You don't care about me health?" He said trying to deflect.

Sarah sighed and held her head in her hands "I do care, Tommy. But I'm tired, the last three months I've been trying to keep this together."

"Welcome to my world." He hummed exhaling more nicotine.

Sarah laughed "Pretty sure it's more difficult for me, given the fact I have to deal with you as well."

Tommy snorted "You don't think that I have to deal with myself as well."

"I don't think you know how to, Tom." She chuckled, before sighing "I prefer you like this."

"Like what?"

"Like you. I'm tired of fighting you all the time."

"We've always fought Sarah, that won't change."

"I know, but I just worry." She told him with her voice cracking, unaware that her eyes were welling up "We used to fight but it was ok because we loved each other. Now when we fight I don't know how far you'll end up pushing me until I snap." She said with her head in her hands, as tears rolled down her face. It was like every emotion she'd felt over the last few months if not longer, had all come to the surface.

Tommy just looked back at her impassively, he had nothing that he could really say. He was too numb to be able to comfort her, too numb to even understand.

Sarah sniffled and wiped the tears from her face, quickly putting her wall back up, trying to pretend that she hadn't just had a mini meltdown in Tommy's office. She slowly stood up and stopped at Tommys side "Don't do anything I wouldn't do at the party." she joked

Tommy smirked and stubbed his cigarette out "doesn't leave a lot then really does it."

Sarah laughed and smacked the back of his head before making her way out of his office.