Ain't no damn wolf

Chapter 18

Ashley's POV
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There's two things in this world I'm weak to.

1)Cats.

2)Food.

Actually, make that a list of three.

3)People crying.

Is it just me? Or when every time someone cries, I feel like the cold heartless bitch who just stands there and awkwardly triesー keyword: triesー to comfort the person and attempts to understand what is going on.

So here I am, in our room, with Jake crying in front of me and blaming himself, while I have my arms wrapped around his waist.

A/N: In case you forgot, Ashley told him about how her parents died and that she was the reason. And it ended up with Jake crying.

He didn't talk for a while, neither did I. The room was silent, the only sounds were of Jake's choking voice and the whirling of the fan blades. I could feel his warm tears dripping onto my arm and his shoulders were trembling.

'Jake.. Don't cry?'

No answer. Just more choking noises.

'Jake please? It hurts me to see you cry. This isn't even your fault, look. The past is in the past. It won't affect the pack, or anyone else. So please? Don't cry?' I pleaded, my arms still hugging him and I had my face buried in his back. Well, partially buried.

Still no reply. Come on, I know tears will blur out your vision, not your hearing Jake.

'.. We can go get some cup noodles? They're good for you?'

Ok, I know I'm not exactly the best person at cheering people up, but at least respond to me.

I sighed and rubbed his hands using my thumbs. Wow, I never really realized how rough they were. Are all boys like this?

'Jak--'

'How are you so.. Ok about it?' I'm getting more and more confused by the second, 'Without anyone to rely on, you had to keep this burden all to yourself even as you grow up. You say you killed them but, nobody ever gave you the chance to explain. You were at war with the whole world, and nobody to aid you!' He spun me around so I faced him. His every word was laced with regret and guilt. His grey eyes brimming with tears, they poured out like there's no tomorrow.

I didn't say a word. Just stared at his eyes while his tears dripped on my face, what did he mean when he said I was at war with the world? Did he think there was some kind of drastic meaning behind this whole story? I killed my parents, end of story. I killed them because my Flügel went out of control, simple as that. Sure it gave my nightmares for about a few months, but that was years ago.

And my neck is hurting. Damn boy, why you gotta be so tall?

'Jake, my Flügel went out of control and took over. By the time I regained conscience, I was outside the house with my parents lifeless bodies sprawled in front of me. There is no drastic explanation,' I explained slowly, making sure he understood every thing I said. Funny how I'm trying to get him to see that I am a monster instead of the typical "I'm innocent, side with me" type dealio.

'Ashley, baby. Sometimes, our wolves go out of control too. I've heard a few stories about newly shifted wolves also killing their loved ones, but they were given a chance! People understood them, they weren't blamed and shun upon like you. You had no other person to back you up! You.. You were alone. And I should have been there for you.' His voice was barely a whisper. My mouth formed and "o" shape, so that's why he was crying. Because he.. Pitied me? Is that it?