Insomniacs (#1)

45. my promise

Funerals were a bit of a sore spot. For all of us standing in my bedroom, right now.

It'd been twelve days since the night me and Luca found Sarah, nine days since Jenny came over to the house to do some checks, seven days since Benji started in his new school. He loved it already.

Today's the thirteenth day since and at midnight tonight, I turn eighteen. Jenny allowed me to sign the guardianship forms yesterday and said she'd authorise them tomorrow seeing as though I was annoyingly impatient.

And although I wasn't Benji's legal guardian yet, he had been beaming over the fact for the past week, strolling up to random strangers when we'd walk down the street and smiling, "Hey! Look, she's my sister. Yup, this pretty one!"

I had to give him a little talk about talking to strangers so much but it didn't lessen his excitement at all. Although Benji was almost finally happy, his trauma still seeped through at night. He started having nightmares. Frequently, sometimes more than one each night.

Jenny had run me through a lot of things before I signed the guardianship forms. Including the details of what I need to provide for him at the very least, until he turns eighteen. Making sure he's enrolled in a school, is registered with a doctor etc but another requirement was counselling sessions.

She found a good counsellor that Benj would need to go to three times a weekz

He'd only gone twice so far and the counsellor, Trinity, had informed me he wasn't very co-operative about his nightmares. She did say it was usual in kids that had just undergone trauma and grief but she hopes with time, he'll open up.
Counselling would be a critical part of his healing so in order to uphold my promise - to Sarah and myself; that he wouldn't have to deal with all his things like we did as kids - I made sure Benji was on time, every session.

And that every time he woke up scared I'd be there to hold him back to sleep.

Other than that, it really didn't feel like an all too massive change. He'd become such an integral part in everyone's lives these past two weeks, the way I lived without him before was already beginning to blur. It all felt so right, so natural.

But the day had rolled up on us: Sarah's funeral.

I was the one paying for the bulk of it, using the saved money Enrico had put in my funds over a long amount of time. Mum wasn't happy with the fact I was spending so much of it but mum hadn't been happy with me for a long time. And it'd certainly been a long time since I seeked her approval for anything.

Amelia and Micah also insisted on pitching in. When I assured them that it was okay, repeatedly, they didn't budge at all. They'd transferred the money before I could rebuttal further.

We had to get to the cemetery soon but here we were: Everest, Luca and Miguel all fiddling with Benji's tie.

"No, you jackass! It's this way." Ev slapped Lu's hand away.

"Slap me one more time, Ev and I'm gonna use this very tie to strangle you." Luca seethed back.

"Lu!" My eyes went wide. He looked back to me sitting on the bed behind him and smiled a tight smile of apology, looking back at Benj, "Sorry, kiddo. I didn't mean that." He paused for a second, muttering the next bit under his breath, "I wouldn't use your tie. I'd use his own."

Miguel snorted out in laughter, Benji's lips tugging upwards as the two best friends invested themselves in a glaring competition.

"I fucking hate you." Luca mouthed.

"We all know you mean sexually fucking attracted." Everest mouthed back, grinning. I dropped my head in dismay.

"Okay- how do none of you know how to tie a tie when all of your ties are done?" I asked.