Don't Mess With Me

Chapter 76

The ultrasound screen was pulled up as the doctor inserted the wand into Maddie looking for any sign of a baby. Maddies and Bucky eyes were glued to the screen waiting for the small speck of grey to appear. If it was up to Bucky, he would be jumping off the face of the earth right now with how much guilt was pushing into his body from all side like he couldn't breath. "I am not seeing any 4 week old baby in here" moving the wand around slightly looking at every nook and cranny of her uterus.

Maddies eyes drop to the side away from the screen looking at her discard bottoms on the floor seeing the dark dried blood peaking out from the shorts she slipped on before they left. The doctor let them be as Maddie changed into the new clothes they brought her so she didn't have to wear the others.

Both of them were quiet Maddie was still flinching on any movement Bucky made, she didn't want to flinch but she coudn't stop her body from doing it. Bucky wanted so badly to comfort her and tell her how sorry he was but he seen the way she was flinching when he would move his hand out to open to door for her and move her to the side so she didn't hit anyone. He didn't know what to do all he knows is that he killed their kid all because of them.

Making their way back to the room to collect their belongings as T'Challa workers cleaned up the mess and have them moved to another room. Maddie excused her self to the bathroom at the end of the hall while Bucky went in to help pack their stuff up.

The cleaning crew were already there sweeping up all the broken pieces. The bed was completely on its side leaned up against the wall. Packing up Maddie stuff that was scattered all across the room finding the broken EPI-pen underneath one of her shirts. Shaking the shirt to get rid of any pieces off of it.

Maddie walking in a few minutes later just as the workers were tilting the bed off the wall. "Stop!" she shouts putting her hands up making them freeze, Bucky looking over his shoulder to see her staring at the bed that the men were holding. "Buck come here" without moving her eyes to him, standing up walking towards her, "Look" pointing at the bed.

Looking over at the bed seeing what she was seeing, "You didn't do it...it happened before all of this happened" both of staring at the fist size blood spot on the bed where Maddie was laying. The relief that flooded through Bucky knowing he didn't cause the miscarriage but the guilt of still not being able to stop the miscarriage still fogged his entire body. "You didn't do it" her small voice filling his ears looking down at her.

Bringing her hand up rubbing her hand over his forearm trying to comfort him knowing that, that is all he has been thinking about and putting all the blame on him. "What if I hit you while you were on the bed and it caused that" coming up for a reason he did it, "You did hit me when I was on the bed but you hit my arm and it tossed me to the ground...there wouldn't have been enough time, there would've been no time at all" reassuring him.

"Can we continue?" the workers asked "Oh shit ya you can sorry" apologizing having them hold they heavy ass bed. The workers continue to move everything as the couple moved all of their stuff to the other room, Maddie sitting on the bed looking out at the city all moving around not even knowing what happened.

Bucky crouching down in front of Maddie slowly putting his hand on her knees to make her look at him pulling her attention away from the city. Her eyes full of worry, sadness, and fear stung him as he knows he caused all those feelings inside of her, "I'm no mind reader like Wanda but I think I know what you are thinking..." rubbing his thumbs over her knees trying to help her relax " do you want to go home?" he asks never looking away from her face with her puffy cheeks and swollen eye lids. "Bu-"

"Do you want to go home?" he asks again knowing she is going to say something about his arm being built just across the street. Nodding her head so slightly he barely seen it "Okay we can go right now or whenever you like just tell me when"

"Right now...please" her voice barely and whisper and cracking, "Okay, I'll go load up the jet you stay here, I'll be right back" patting her legs pushing himself up kissing the top of her head grabbing their things leaving her in the room. Falling backwards onto the bed looking up at the huge 20 foot ceilings with soft swirls all over. Dragging her hands from the side of the bed to her stomach, "I'm sorry, I really am I don't know what I am doing wrong...I am eating all the foods they say to eat...I am taking all my vitamins...I'm drinking one extra glass of water a day...I'm still doing workouts and yoga to stay active...I'm laying in bed longer and not jumping straight out of bed like I usually do...I'm not drinking anything bad, no soda, no juice, no alcohol, just smoothies full of fresh fruit and veggies and a shit ton of water...I'm taking cooler showers because its not good to take showers above a hundred degrees, I'm not taking baths in that hot water, I didn't once get in the jacuzzi at the resort...I make sure not to wear anything tight around my belly...I don't know what I am doing wrong..."

The sound of a knock on the door pulling her away from her thoughts standing up to open it seeing the workers from the room, "We found your phones" handing them to her "Oh thank you"

"Welcome miss" walking away back to the room. Looking over the phones seeing that both screens were completely smashed with portions of them missing. "Good thing I save everything to the cloud" mumbling to herself walking back over to the window taking in one final view, "Everything is in the jet you ready to go?" walking up to her cautiously  "Ya" turning around handing him his phone, "Tony owes you a new phone"

"Ya and I owe you a new one too, that's the second time I broke it" chuckling a little reminiscing on when she caught him on her phone her first night there and he jumped causing the phone to fly up in the air crashing back down on the floor. Oh how so much has changed.

T'Challa and Shuri wishing them safe travels watching as the jet raised from the pad up into the air flying off into the distance. The entire flight was quiet except for the few words here and there and the talk of what to do with the plates of discarded food that Shuri gave them before they left so they would have something to eat.

As much as Maddie wanted to sleep she was terrified to. Afraid of Bucky turning back into the real life nightmare of this morning. Bucky was completely exhausted from last night, he only remembers the dream and nothing else but his entire body feels like jello. Fighting off the sleep trying to keep his mind occupied by thinking of what Maddie said yesterday about chocolate milk is melted ice cream.

Glancing over at Maddie every once and awhile seeing her spaced out looking out the window watching them fly through the clouds. As Bucky fought his nightmare, Maddie fought hers. She was getting closer to be her mom something she wished she would never be, as much as she loved her mom she was just reminded how much of her mom she really was her by having two miscarriage.

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When I first wrote this chapter it was much longer and then I published it, checked it on the phone and half of it was missing, next chapter has the rest of this chapter.

~Dianne