Sanders Sides Oneshots 🍂

For Them 🥀 Analogical (Logan)

TW: Stress Regarding School, Implied Self-Worth Issues
cw: Angst, Anxiety, Guilt

just take both of them and let me crawl back into my cave-

*~*

It was getting to be too much. He had to admit it. Everything was coming to a close so quickly; stacks on stacks of assignments due at once, large projects quick to follow in their literal paper trails. Finals were so soon and Logan could barely finish his work and just to find time to study let alone take care of himself.

Virgil had tried for well over an hour to pull Logan away from his work to sleep that night, and yet he couldn't get his mind off his grades. Virgil was long asleep by now, leaving Logan to stew in his own thoughts and bury himself in the hypotheticals.

You're gonna fail, you have five essays due just this week, a voice called in Logan's mind as he tried to force himself to sleep. It, obviously, wasn't working. Though to be fair he wasn't working either. Honestly, the main thing that was helping him sleep at night was the absolute exhaustion that houses of work brought him.

He couldn't even tell if the work was worth it anymore. He was going to college for what? A stupid English doctorate? Who the fuck even got English doctorates? Logan apparently.

What was he going to do with it anyway? Write books? There was no guarantee that he was going to land the job as a professor. He could always get rejected and then he would be back at square one with a useless degree not knowing where to go next.

You could always drop out.

Logan looked over to where Virgil was laid beside him. He was curled on his side facing away from Logan and towards the window. The blanket rose and lowered steadily as he breathed, deep in sleep as his soft breaths huffed out against the pillow.

A coil tightened in Logan's stomach, tight and constricting as it slithered up to his throat and threatened to choke him. His chest stuttered as he shifted his eyes to the ceiling where the glow-in-the-dark stars had long died out.

He couldn't. He couldn't do this to Virgil. He had to stay.

They were both banking on Logan getting this doctorate; on Logan getting the job and teaching like his life depended on it- because damn it, it did. He couldn't just waste all of this progress- waste eight years of nonstop work and double shifts and loans- and that was if Logan were to even pass his exams considering how early this was for him to graduate. They were in debt and Logan couldn't back out now.

The degree was so close he could practically taste it- he could feel the phantom fiber of the flimsy paper that he would have to hold onto so tightly. God- that thing would make or break his life. Their lives.

Virgil stirred, his hips rolling to get comfortable; Logan held his breath.

He had to stick this out. If not for him, then for them.

Logan rolled to face Virgil and wrapped an arm around him, sticking his hand under his shirt. Slowly, he trailed his hand up up up until it rested just above Virgil's heart.

It beat, steady and sure as it usually was whenever he was around him. Logan let out his breath and closed his eyes, willing the weight in his chest to alleviate itself.

One day, and then the next.

*~*

take my drabbles and i'll run while you look at them in disappointment and possibly a hint of concern

(requests not open, not surprising anyone)