Blindfold ✔️

Chapter 27: It Hurts Too Much

Taehyung's POV

Jungkook-ah, it's been two years since you left. It still hurts so fucking much, but I can breathe a little better. Do you like the tree we planted for you? I think that it's pretty. Are these daffodils the yellow you like? You like daffodils while I like tulips. They are both gorgeous flowers.

"Tae, it's about to rain." Jin hyung tells me as we stand next to Jungkook's tree.

"Ok, I'll go to the car in a second." I smile and pat his shoulder.

"Oh, Namjoon chose the Pale Moon for dinner. Does that work with you?" Jin hyung asks and looks at me.

"Yeah. They have good food. I love their fried chicken." I smile and pat my tummy.

"Ok, I'll leave you alone. We'll see you there. Take your time. Here's an umbrella." Jin hyung smiles then walks off.

"Koo, none of them have gotten married yet. What is taking them so long? I'm afraid they are waiting because I am still in pain, but I will never not be in pain. I really hope that they're not waiting for me. Should I ask them to make sure? I don't know what to do." I talk to Jungkook and don't notice the rain falling.

"Tae Bear, the umbrella." 

"Oh, thanks." V has been so attentive to me the past couple of years.

"Ok, Koo, I'm going to go. I'll go to the beach tomorrow night. The weather will be nicer tomorrow night than tonight. I will talk to you then." I whisper then walk off.

When I walk into the restaurant, I see everyone happily talking and laughing. Today is a hard day because it's the anniversary, so we all agreed to have dinner together, but I don't think I can do this. Not today. I can't laugh today. Not right now. I can't do it.

I quickly turn around then head back home. Once I am home, I grab the keys to the motorcycle and fly down the highway in the whipping rain and wind. The pain is too deep today. I purposefully left my phone at home because I want to be alone. I need to be alone today.

When I come to a screeching stop at the beach, I jump off of the bike and run to the waves. I stare out at the turbulent ocean and scream. As I scream, I fall to my knees and let the water lap against my waist.

I've tried so hard, but it is just too painful. He was alone. He was broken. He must have been so scared. The pain must have been unbearable. I will never be able to forgive myself for leaving him like that. I can tell myself all day that I went to get help, but in the end, he died alone. He was mercilessly tossed into a furnace. 

Jungkook-ah, I'm so sorry. I've tried to hard. I've tried to treasure the life you protected, but it is just too hard. I'm not healing. I'm still breaking.

As the cold water whips my body, I slowly stand up and listen to the call of the waves. I don't want to hurt Hyung, but I can't take this anymore. He's not alone either. There are the others. they love him and will take care of him. Can I just be with Jungkook? Can I go to you now?

"Tae?"

"I'm so sorry, V. I can't take this anymore. I'm so sorry."

"It's ok."

In a daze, I walk towards the call of the sea. It will be peaceful in the end. As I walk deeper, I hear someone calling out to me. They're begging me to stop. Why would I stop? I don't want to stop. I just want it to end. I hear someone running in the water behind me, but I keep walking. They sound desperate but the sea's call is louder. The pull of the waves is strong because of the raging storm. 

I close my eyes and let the waves crash over me. The cold depths of the water wrap their fingers around me and pull me deeper and deeper. It's cold, but it's peaceful.