BEWITCHED 1 (BL)

Part 21

21

Lex POV

"Dàmmit!"

Hindi ko na pinigilan pa si Amos sa mga pagbabasag niya sa mga gamit na nahahawakan niya dito sa sala. Baliktad na ang center table at nabasag na rin ang glass nun. Iyong malalaking vases sa sala ay wala na rin puro na iyon basag. Ang kawawang lampshade naman ay di na rin pinalagpas pa ni Amos.

It was the first time I saw Amos gone this mad. I always saw him as calm, gentle, sweet, and caring man. Not this one. He looked like he lost himself in the oblivion and just wreck everything his hands can grip. He looked like a wild animal in the forest, looking something to be tear off. I almost went deaf because of the glass clatters and loud thuds.

I cannot stop him. I cannot go near him. He hollered profanities that I lost count with as he broke all his expensive and exquisite furniture. He keeps on cursing Adam kahit na wala na naman si Adam dito.

Hapong-hapo siya nang umupo sa sofa na natabingi na. Doon lang ako dahan-dahan na lumapit kay Amos. Hindi ko na rin mapigilan ang pag-agos sa mga luha ko. Nakita ko kung paano niya hinahawakan ang sariling kamao na namumula at may dugo. I don't know if it's Adam's blood o baka dahil iyong sa pagbabasag niya nang gamit.

Amos is still breathing deeply and looks like he is not yet calm after breaking all his furnitures‐things.

Lumuhod ako sa harapan niya. Mabuti at walang bubug doon. Hinawakan ko ang namumula, may dugo, at nanginginig niyang kamay.

My lips are still trembling.

"Please. Please. Calm down, Amos." I whispered.

"I still want to chase after that bastard and kill him, baby." Amos voice is shaking is so much restrain from bursting. I know he wanted to yell, to shou,  but he is holding it.

"Like what I said.. don't be a criminal for me, Amos. I don't deservee it. I'm not worth the fight-"

"You worth it, baby. I'll tell you, baby, you're worth everything. I thought Adam would love you. I thought he was sincere  with his feelings for you. But i was wrong. He is the one who brought in so much despair. I got so nervous and anxious when I court you, Lex. Cause you looked like you never wanted me nor anyone around you. God knows how I anxious I am. And now that you're mine. I can put everything on the line just to protect you. I love you, baby. I love you so much that I think I might have gone mad when I lost you." Amos lamented.

Mas yumuko pa ako habang hawak pa rin ang kamao niya. "Why? Why me, Amos? Alam mo bang matagal ko nang gusto yang itanong sayo. I'm not confident with myself. I'm an orphan. I am gay."

Amos caressed my chin and lifted it. I saw the burning desire, love, and the afflection that i always saw in his eyes when he looked at me.

"I cannot give you a solid answer, baby. I cannot give you a satisfying answer. I cannot give you an answer that you'd like to hear. Because I just found myself drowning into you. It may sound so cheesy, but  I just found myself smiling when I looked at you. Yes, what if you're a gay? That doesn't make you less of a human. You are my rest, baby. You are my home. My love. My everything in this lifetime. And as long as I Iive. I will never get tired of saying, I love you. And I will never get tired of showing you how much you mean in my life. I hope you know, now, how much I want you, Lex. I want you. Like how much I want you for the rest of my life."

Tumayo ako at niyakap si Amos. Yes. He couldn't give me a concrete answer, but what he said was enough for me. It was more than enough.

"I also want you. I also want you, Amos. Kaya nga natakot ako kanina. Sobra akong natakot  sa ginawa ni Adam. Natatakot ako na baka ayaw mo na. Na baka pandirihan mo ako.." I cried like a baby on his neck.