Part 31 Enjoy <3

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by lydiaisamazing

by lydiaisamazing

                                    
                                              Do not let your happiness depend on people who are only temporarily in your life 
                          They will take your smile with them when they leave 
                          And you will end up hurt every single time.

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                          When you feel like you can’t breathe anymore 
                          Blast your favorite music as loud as you can and turn on all the lights 
                          Everything that’s bright and loud will help chase the darkness away 
                          Jump. Scream. Draw all over your body. Smash some plates. 
                          Ground yourself. Remind yourself you’re still alive. 
                          
                          The world won’t slip through your fingers as long as you keep breathing.
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                          Choosing recovery will be the most difficult thing you ever do 
                          Because it means you’re choosing to live 
                          
                          When you still want to die.
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                          My scars are fading 
                          
                          But so I am.
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                          Anxiety feels like 
                          Being too scared to live 
                          And too scared to die 
                          It’s like standing on a trail 
                          With enormous mountains looming in front of you 
                          And a deep gorge behind you 
                          It doesn’t matter which step you take 
                          Because they are all equally terrifying 
                          But do not forget 
                          
                          Only one will kill you.
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                          You are sitting there next to me crying while I am lying on the bed with a drip the only thing keeping me alive.
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                          The rain is my best friend because I can cry infront of people why fake smiling and they don't notice and sometimes I need that. I need that reminder that I am always alone. No matter how many friends you've got. No matter how many people tell you they love you, I will always be alone when it comes down to it. I will always be thrown away like trash.
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