Kill My Mind || DOLLHOUSE Spin-off

5. Alejandro

My body jolted forward as I woke up screaming and covered in sweat. My heart was pounding and I was taking deep heavy breaths. I grabbed onto the bed sheets fisting it in my hands. I closed my eyes but the darkness just made the flashbacks worse.

I turned the lamp on and stumbled out of my bed. My breath was calming down, and I needed a cold shower or something. I was having a nightmare. It happened often. I'm six years older than Bella and nine years older than Matteo. Until Bella was 10 I endured all the torture from my dad, and even then I got the worst of it. I always tried protecting my siblings and it's caused a lot more mental pain then physical.

Before either of them were even old enough to comprehend what my dad was doing my scars were deep.

Most of my nightmare had been of times he'd hurt me. The times he made me hurt others. I hated them they were filled with blood and tears sometimes mine, sometimes those who I loved. When he passed I kicked my mother out, after buying her a big ass apartment for feeling bad, and I threw out his things. Only Bella knew of these nightmare because she used to take care of me when I couldn't calm down. I refused to let her tell Matteo. But now she was out of the house, and Matteo didn't want mafia involvement so he would leave when I had to work or basically whenever we didn't have plans to hang out.

I stepped into the cold shower and shivered as the water ran down my body. The only positive I took away from these nightmares was that I had them and not my siblings. I couldn't handle having to see them wake up in the middle of the night sobbing, and unable to breath.

After a few minute of just calming myself down I turned off the water and stepped out of the shower. I wrapped a towel around my waist and walked back into my room.

The digital clock said 2:48 A.M. I picked up my phone to text Matteo

Me: Want to get some food? Can't sleep.

I waited a moment for him to reply. I chuckled at his contact name that I gave him prior to his growth spurt when he was about 5'5. Now he's 5'10 and a half and he punches my shoulder when I don't add the half.

Tiny Teo: I'm driving, and I want Chick-Fil-A Meet me at the car in 5.

I went to my closet to put on boxers,  gray sweatpants, and a blue gym shirt that was tight on my body.

Matteo was leaning on his Porsche convertible. We each had two cars and he wants to start collecting. "Ready to go?"

He looked up at me and smiled as he put his phone in his pocket. Both of us got in the car and as soon as he turned it on he put the music on. He put on Eminem. Bella had scolded him on his music taste and they settled on him being allowed to listen to late 90's early 2000's rap.

"Why did you want to get food so late at night? You high?"

I glanced at him. I knew he smoked on occasion rather than drink and as long as he did it responsibly I honestly didn't mind I just preferred he didn't tell me. Maybe I should ground him or something considering he's only 16 but he's not going to school high, and he's a good kid so I let it slide.

"Nope. Just couldn't sleep. Why are you up?"

He shrugged "It's summer break and I did my homework no need to worry about sleep." I chuckled. He started to speed up since no one was on the road and I gave him a dirty look telling him to slow down.

We pulled up in front of Chick-Fil-A. I tried to have it yesterday but they were closed "Do you ever feel bad about eating here? Because they're homophobic." I asked him.

He shook his head as he turned the car off  "Gray told me it didn't matter as long as I was aware it's homophobic. He then proceeded to hit on one of the male workers. Then he hit on his female co-worker." I chuckled

Gray did that a lot. He'd flirt with a guy and then go flirt with a girl. They usually both gave him their numbers. I could never do that. I suck at flirting the only reason I landed Abby was because she asked me out.

"I should tell him we're here." I sent him a photo of the outside of the restaurant as Matteo and I walked in. About a second later I got a call from him

"Spicy chicken sandwich" is all he said when I picked up

"Huh?"

"It's what I want. You can't send me a picture of food and not get me some."

"I brought you food yesterday." since Gray has been in physical therapy for a week now i've been seeing him so much. Adam said he might need a little bit of help and to Gray that meant I became his personal servant.

"Please i'm injured. Don't say no to the injured" I sighed and walked up to the counter

"Can I get a spicy chicken sandwich, and a 12 piece nugget."

"Oh and fries!" Gray yelled

"And fries."

...

Matteo said he wanted to go to bed so he dropped me off at Gray's and told me to uber home. I can't say it's been one of our more exciting night out adventures but both of us were sleepy.

I rang the doorbell and as if he was waiting there for me he answered right away "Food! You know I don't have any cash is there any other way I can give you a tip?"

I chuckled and rolled my eyes "I'm coming in to eat with you." I pushed past him and he muttered something about me being no fun.

"So why were you up so late?" he asked. I bit the inside of my cheek subtly. Mafia men weren't meant to show emotion around anyone but family. I tried my best but I was an emotional person and Gray really brought me out of my shell. I was typically quiet. This emotion, though, was something I didn't want to talk about. He didn't need to hear about my nightmares.

"I wasn't Matteo woke me up. Said he was bored. Why were you up?"

"Gym." I frowned at him. He wasn't meant to be physical like that for another two months and he knows not to run. But I did have to admit his gym was well built. He was well built. He was the tallest in our friend group and I happened to be the shortest guy. Not that 5'11 is short it's just that all the guys are over 6'0. But Gray had nice abs and definitely looked like he worked out. "I wasn't doing anything crazy just some weights. It's been bothering me I can't go back to the office. I had to have someone else deal with the ones who hurt me."

Going back to the office was code for killing people in the basement. Now that Gray was the head of the Italian mafia he did have to work. Before that he basically just killed whoever wronged them. He was good at that. As head of the second most powerful branch of the Italian mafia, the De Luca mafia, I can hire people to do my killings. My dad used to do it for my dad but I couldn't anymore. I just handled the business now.

"Let's eat this on the couch. They play the Marvel movies on showtime at three A.M."

He chuckled as he led me to the couch "Why do you know that?"

"I'm up a lot at three A.M."

...

I was laying on the couch. My stomach always hurt after Chick-Fil-A. Iron-Man two was playing in the background. I heard it shut off, and Gray get up. I could barely move I was so tried but I couldn't sleep.

I felt something be placed over me. It was a soft blanket. I had my eyes closed. "Night Ale." Gray had said but I didn't hear him walk away "You suck for having to be so handsome and unavailable."

I tried not to smile but as soon as he walked away I did. I never had two nightmares in a row so it was safe for me to fall asleep at some point...I just didn't know when