Hate Me Before You Love Me (BDSM/Mature)

Chapter 29. You are loved

The first ultrasound was surreal for Peter and Alex. Although Alex has three biological kids, he has never been to an ultrasound before. He never did it when Chloe had Cody, and of course, the two times Emma got pregnant, it was Peter that was there for her. And it's surreal for Peter because this time he did this with Alex and Bella. After Emma, Bella was the first woman that Peter had a serious relationship with. Bella's personality is a lot different than Emma's; she's introverted and very calm. Emma had confidence and charm on her that really good for their previous company.
Alex and Peter told the kids last weekend about the pregnancy. They took the kids to camp and brought Bella with them. They had to explain that Bella is now a part of the family. Bea still doesn't truly comprehend the explanation, but Russ and Cody were happy with the news. They all adore Bella, and Cody even wants to start calling Bella 'Mom'. Peter and Alex understand that no matter how great they are with the kids, they still miss their mother. Especially after Emma passed away, Russ's behavior had changed to more rebellious while Bea kept crying and wanting her mom.
They decided to move to Boston in a month or so. Peter will move there in two weeks, and the rest of the family will follow him two weeks after that. It was arranged that way just to make Bella's pregnancy reach the third month first before the long ride to Boston. Peter and Alex contacted Sean, who happily found them a place in the same apartment building as he was. Peter had asked if Alex would let Sean back into their relationship again, and Alex said he didn't mind, but he wanted to focus on Bella and the baby.
They agreed that in public they would say that Bella is their surrogate, because it's just simpler to admit that than to say what it is. Polyamory is not exactly traditional, and they don't want to explain it in a hundred words or less to someone that they probably won't ever see again. They decided not to tell Bella's family because they would never understand anyway. That's why moving is a good way to hide Bella's pregnancy.
Peter held Alex's hand tightly as they entered the exam room. He and Alex had been through so much in the previous few years that he still hasn't completely forgiven Alex.But he knows that he still loves Alex, and he hopes that the baby will draw them closer. Their marriage is still fragile as it is, but Peter felt that Bella was the woman that they needed to improve their marriage.
The gynecologist arrived with a smile on her face. She prepared the machine and rubbed the gel onto Bella's belly, which still showed very little indication of pregnancy. Alex almost cried when he heard the baby's heartbeat for the first time, and Peter kissed Bella's head, thanking her for bringing him this joy in his life.
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Peter opened the window to his new apartment, the apartment that would be occupied by his big family. It was two units, and Peter had negotiated with the owner to get a connection door between the two units. The kids will occupy the two-bedroom next door, and the adults with the baby will be in the three-bedroom unit. Peter and Alex decided to turn one of them into Alex's work room and the occasional study room for the kids.
But there's only Peter now, alone for two weeks, and it surely feels lonely. His mind started to go to his unhappy place; his fights with Alex that always ate his happiness. Then he thinks about Emma, who slept with Alex behind his back; his two best friends betrayed his trust. That beautiful, sweet one of his, having an orgasm with his Emma.
The knocks on the door brought him back to the real world, and he opened the door. Sean was there, looking handsome and with a big smile on his face. He brought wine and Peter's favorite lasagna. Peter let Sean in, and he had to hold himself back from kissing or doing something else he would regret with Sean.
Peter wonders what his love story would be like if he had decided to stay with Sean back then. Maybe he's happier now? Or would Sean hurt him by asking to add another guy to their relationship? He felt like a hypocrite that now he was in a polyamorous relationship, just what Sean had asked them to be in previously. Peter is still in love with Sean, and he can feel that his dick told him the same thing. Peter had Alex's blessing to do whatever he wanted with Sean, but he felt guilty.
When Sean's butt bumped into his dick as they moved around to prepare the dinner, Peter felt like there was a jolt of sexual arousal on his dick. He wants to bend Sean over the counter and fuck him good. He wants Sean, and it's crazy because he had a pregnant girl waiting to come there with his husband in two weeks. Peter grabbed Sean's wrist and pinned him to the kitchen counter. A kiss would not hurt his marriage, right? So, he kissed the man. Which was reciprocated with another kiss and a whisper from Sean that he wanted Peter so badly.
Sean had texted Alex before, and Alex had given him consent to fuck Peter if he wanted it. The last time they were together, they had a huge fallout because of Sean's relationship with Peter. But Sean called Alex a couple of times after his accident. Alex apologized for his behavior, and Sean apologized too.
Sean sometimes felt sadness in Peter's voice on their calls. Peter is still struggling to forgive Alex, but he also knows that he loves this man who hurts him. It's not easy to be Peter, and Sean understands that. Sean just wants Peter to be as happy as when they were together the first time. But with Alex's accident, he knew that Peter would never leave Alex. Peter was devastated by that accident. It brought his traumatic memories back. The memories for which he blames himself suggest that his call to Emma might have been the cause of Emma's death.
So, before it got too far, Sean stopped it, and it hurt him to see how upset Peter was when he stopped their kissing. Peter did not say anything but "sorry," and he pretended that they were not in love. But they both know that rushing into this just because Alex and Bella were not around is just not right.
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There was blood on the sheets, Bella cried, and Alex held her tightly. Peter called 911 and held onto his tears. They probably lost the baby, the one thing that might have fixed the marriage. Bella has been complaining about pain since a few hours ago. She screamed in agony when she saw blood on the sheets.
The next couple hours were painful for the three of them. It's only a week after they all moved to Boston. Who knew that their story would end up like this? The baby was merely three months into the pregnancy. They knew there was a risk, but when they really had to face the hard reality that they were losing the baby, it's just so much harder when it becomes a reality.
It was a rough night for them, and Bella cried all night about losing the baby. Peter decided to go home because he just couldn't stand it. He had spent way too much time in the hospital this year already, and he had had enough. He wants to runaway from the fact that he just can't have a kid.
When Peter decided to drive home, they had to ask Sean to babysit the kids. Peter wished that he had never tried with Bella, so this horrifying episode never happened in his life. He found Sean in the living room sleeping, so he came closer and kissed his cheeks. He missed Sean. He made the wrong decisions all the time. He should have chosen Sean. Maybe if he had, Emma would still be alive. And if he did, Bella would not be in pain like now.
"Oh.. Pete.." Sean rubbed his eyes.
"Hey.." Peter sat on the floor and leaned his head against Sean's.
"Are you okay?" Sean grabbed Peter's hand and held it.
"No. But that is obvious.." Peter sighed.
"You should sleep. I will take a day off tomorrow so I can help the kids while Bella is recovering." Sean kissed Peter's head gently.
"I want to disappear.. I'm tired of this. I failed everything.." Peter started to sob.
"You are not failing. But, I understand why you feel that way. But let me be real with you. You have three amazing kids that love you, and yes, they are not your biological kids, but people adopt all the time nowadays. Then you have a loving, submissive husband, and you have your shared girlfriend with him. And you have me.." Sean stopped for a moment. "I know that life feels like hell for you, and I agree that you have been through a lot. But, you are loved, Pete. Please.. you have to remember that.."
Peter stared at Sean. He nodded. "I am loved.." He kissed Sean's lips.